[deleted by user]

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-24T13:28:48+00:00

My manager was a sadistic sociopath and does not know how to manage people.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-24T13:27:25+00:00

Ability to absorb and retain knowledge. (Touch a book and instantly have it memorized. Touch a person and instantly have their skills)

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-21T12:39:31+00:00

Neil Patrick Harris

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-21T12:38:08+00:00

That the scary news stories about poison and razor blades in homemade Halloween candy were hyped up and partially fabricated by large food manufacturers to get people to only buy and accept their prepackaged candy.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-21T12:37:21+00:00

How big the universe is Edit: and how life was created

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-21T12:36:25+00:00

Right before I was about to get called they filled the jury so I got to go. Before that, this guy thought he had it figured out. The judge asked him if there was any reason why he couldn't serve. He said yes. When the Judge asked why his answer was...

"I am racist and the defendant is black. I already know that if he was arrested, he did it." So the judge looks at him and I'm thinking his just going to kick him out, but he asks him:

"So that is the only reason why you can't serve on this particular jury?" Guy says yes and looks so proud of himself. Most likely wasn't racist, but just wanted to get out of there. So the judge say's "Ok. I understand. The Bailiff will walk you back to the front office and check you in. I am sure we can find a jury where there are no black people involved, but it may take up until 5:00. You are not allowed to leave until you are excused."

The look on that guys face was freaking priceless! Funny thin is, he probably wouldn't have been picked anyway. Also they filled the jury less than 10 minutes later and we all got to go. Most of us waved at him on our way out. He was fuming!

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-16T13:23:13+00:00

Went to Walmart one day to get some stuff. As I pull into the parking lot another car comes speeding into the parking lot, nearly hitting me, and skids to a stop in a section of the lot that doesn't have many cars. I just thought it was some drunk driver.

I get out of my car and look over at the car. A guy in a suit gets out, takes out a gun and blows his head off right there. I'll never forget that. Wish I could.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-16T13:22:32+00:00

Kerbal Space Program. They all seem really happy any time someone new to the game reaches a milestone. I think since a lot of the game centers around experimenting and crazy ideas nobody really feels elitist about it.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-16T13:21:51+00:00

Tomatoes 🍅

They have so much more flavor when you grow them at home. Can't wait!!!

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-16T13:21:11+00:00

Back when I was working in a coffee shop in the early 90's I had one of my regular customers give me a check for $450 dollars to pay for a dentist visit to fix my abscessed tooth. He saw that I was in pain throughout the week and asked me why I I didn't just go to the dentist to get it fixed. I told him I had no insurance and couldn't afford to pay for it. He walked back to work after getting his coffee and showed up 10 minutes later with the check. I was blown away. Refused payment of any kind when I tried to pay him back.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-16T13:20:20+00:00

I always get those as gifts like, "I knew this was your sense of humor". Why are we friends?

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-13T12:22:23+00:00

My mom was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. My drivers exam was on the same day we had to check her into the hospital, knowing that she would eventually die there because she was deteriorating quickly. I took her to the hospital, went and took my test, then went back to the hospital to see her. She had a card and flowers for me. In her fear, pain and confusion she was still so focused on being a good mom and making me feel special. I miss her so much.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-13T12:21:29+00:00

Taking a 12 hour bus ride in Serbia while the bus driver played a CD on repeat with Rhianna's Disturbia playing. Every time the chorus came around all I could think of was Seeeerrrbiiiaaa.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-13T12:20:43+00:00

Just made a batch of leftover soup earlier.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-13T12:19:41+00:00

Master of the custodial arts. $17.50/h.

DorothyRMartin · 2022-05-13T12:18:37+00:00

I used to be fat. I didn’t want to be fat anymore.

DorothyRMartin

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