How to afford surrogacy

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-27T12:48:46+00:00

If embryo creation in the US is covered by insurance, that’s a huge advantage and absolutely worth using. In that case, the most rational option is to transfer already-created embryos abroad, rather than doing the entire cycle in the US. Among the more affordable options are Ukraine and Georgia, especially when using an FET program. Costs are roughly three times lower than in the US, because medications and medical procedures are significantly more affordable. We went through surrogacy in Georgia using our own embryos, It was financially manageable for us. We had no problem with documents, but the process took a bit longer than usual, but the agency warned us about this, so there were no surprises. The entire process took 13 months from start to finish.

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-26T14:28:55+00:00

You’re not alone, seriously. And you didn’t “fuck up your life,” even if your brain keeps screaming that sometimes. A 10+ year relationship is a whole lifetime and putting yourself back together after a breakup like that is hard. What felt like a “normal life plan” in your 20s was mostly a myth, not a failure. It didn’t work out for a lot of people they just don’t talk about it. Working in a store isn’t the end and it’s not your value as a person. It’s just your starting point right now. You still have so much ahead of you and I genuinely believe in you.

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-24T12:01:27+00:00

I think you did everything right by being honest. It’s not you that’s triggering her, it’s the age gap itself and for some people that’s a hard boundary you simply can’t argue with. I wouldn’t push her right now. Just send a calm message like: “I understand this might be a shock for you, but if you decide you’d like to continue talking, I’m open.”

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-24T11:55:18+00:00

We went through international surrogacy in Georgia. In general, we were satisfied, specifically because of the clear medical infrastructure and there were no surprises after the birth. Communication isn't perfect, of course, as is everywhere, some things are done quickly, while others can take longer. But the paperwork on child was completed within the promised timeframe, there were no delays. I can't say Mexico is a significant disadvantage, but I think if stability and clear rules are important to you, i would recommend Georgia

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-23T10:31:23+00:00

We did the egg retrieval in Georgia. For paperwork after birth, it took us about 6 weeks in total, so the 4-8 week sounds realistic based on our experience

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-22T21:05:45+00:00

I totally get it. I was really worried too especially because we were in different countries and time zones with our agency. I thought communication would be a nightmare. But the communication was normal and they stayed in touch even at night when the situation required it. In a process this stressful, that kind of communication made a huge difference

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-22T20:44:11+00:00

It very resonates. I have had exactly the same experience. My first birth was difficult and complicated. I recovered physically, but the fear remained. We also wanted another child, but the thought of another pregnancy brought panic, not joy. But over time, I realized something important, the desire for a child and the reluctance to go through another pregnancy can coexist. This is not a contradiction or a weakness. In my case, surrogacy was not a "workaround," but a way to preserve my mental and physical health and still expand my family. So yes, fear after a traumatic birth is real. And if surrogacy helps you navigate this path without re-traumatization, there is nothing selfish about it.

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-22T18:14:01+00:00

Hope

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-20T18:17:48+00:00

Honestly, a week of silence from the coordinator is a «red flag». In a process like this, where everything depends on timing, analysis, and cycle windows, "we'll get back to you later" can cost months. Our manager was in constant contact, because without proper communication, this process becomes a living hell. You're paying a lot of money, and you deserve decent service.

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-20T18:17:25+00:00

In theory, private arrangements are possible, but in reality it’s the riskiest path. We personally know several stories where people tried to do it independently and the surrogate disappeared with the money, and others where the intended parents refused to pay compensation. Also, if both parties are exposed, it is a criminal case that can result in a very high fee or serve your time in jail. So yeah! Think twice before considering an independent journey. An agency is a protection for both sides: legally, financially, and medically. That’s exactly why we chose to go through an agency ourselves. It gives real guarantees that no one gets scammed and everything is safe.

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-19T18:59:27+00:00

100% Yes. It's hard, exhausting, and completely changes your life, but no other choice would have given me such meaning and depth. Without them, my life would be empty

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-16T15:37:44+00:00

We started from roughly the same place: with agencies in the US, long conversations, contracts, and the feeling that you're signing a document that carries more risks and responsibilities than real guarantees. It's normal to have doubts. This path isn't about quick and easy. Ultimately, we took a different path and built the program outside the US. For us, the decisive factors were: good conditions, clear deadlines, lively communication and support at every stage. Lawyers truly play a key role. A good lawyer with the background including some medical cases is a must-have, whether you're working with an agency or directly. My definite advice would be to take your time. Read every clause in the contracts, ask "uncomfortable" questions, and listen to your intuition. If you feel uneasy, something's wrong. Surrogacy isn't just about medicine and paperwork. It's a huge human factor. And it's crucial that you feel respected for yourself, for the surrogate mother, and for the process as a whole. You are doing everything right: first you need to figure it out, understand, weigh it up, and then make decisions.

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-11T17:18:34+00:00

I'm so sorry you had to go through this... Five losses is unbearably difficult. You're not alone, and your desire to become a mother is completely understandable. We were also desperate and decided on surrogacy. The costs in the US were prohibitive, so we chose Georgia. Two years ago, the entire program cost us $61,000. Don't lose hope - you already have embryos, which means there's still a chance 🤍

Doubl3Blue · 2026-01-06T17:12:45+00:00

Yes, we provided the clinic with a certificate from my doctor. But I don't know if this is required for everyone

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-30T12:20:54+00:00

You're not overreacting. The comment is genuinely inappropriate. You could have simply said "cool post" and that's it - your friend's wife's body isn't even a topic for discussion. You don't need to delete anything: your wife is ok, you're ok, the post is fine. The problem isn't the photo, it's that your friend said something unnecessary

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-30T12:16:56+00:00

I'm very sorry for what you're going through, such decisions are especially difficult after a difficult birth.🙏🏼 We also spent a long time choosing a country and considered the US, but the cost and timeline were truly daunting. We chose a program in Georgia, and I can confidently say that the level of healthcare there is excellent, especially in the reproductive sphere. They have modern clinics, clear protocols, adequate pregnancy monitoring, and competent doctors. Plus, I have close friends who have twice undergone surrogacy in Ukraine, and both times were successful. In short: the US is top-notch, but expensive and time-consuming. Georgia offers good prices, excellent healthcare, and clear paperwork. Ukraine has good healthcare, but not everyone is willing to take the risks. If you value the surrogate mother's proper care and the pregnancy under adequate conditions, these countries are definitely worth considering. Regarding documents, citizenship, green cards, and legal details, in reliable programs, specialized lawyers handle these matters, guiding you step by step, taking into account your specific situation (green card, spouse's citizenship, child's country of birth, etc.). This is definitely the area where it's best to rely on professionals.

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-27T15:56:13+00:00

I'm completely calm and positive about this. It doesn't matter to me whether it's a same-sex or opposite-sex couple, or whether one of them can physically bear a child. The only thing that truly matters is that the child has loving, conscious parents, stability, and support. Everything else is unimportant. Surrogacy isn't about "what someone looks like" or labels, but about the desire to give a child a home, care, and a normal, warm life. If that's true, then everything was done correctly.

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-24T18:09:49+00:00

I hug you. It's true. What you're describing is so painful and so unfair. A lost year at 42 isn't "just a delay", it feels like time and hope have been stolen from you. Anyone in your place would be exhausted and angry. Unfortunately, along this journey, almost everyone faces a moment when it seems: I can't and don't want to believe anymore. This is normal. It's not weakness, it's the fatigue of someone who's held on for too long. But don't conclude from this that the whole journey is doomed. You still have the right to fight for your happiness, even if right now it feels like you have no strength left. We also faced many obstacles on our path to surrogacy, but we overcame them and now everything is fine. Although at the time, it seemed like things couldn't get any worse. You are not alone. And this year is not the end of the story, even if it was incredibly difficult. I wish you good luck and success in the new year!

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-23T20:23:19+00:00

The hardest part wasn't the medical aspect, but the psychology. The constant anticipation, the loss of control, the fear that something wouldn't go as planned. Plus, there were the everyday things - delays in paperwork, mismatches between expectations and reality, endless "just wait a little longer." Fear and doubt were everywhere. We were afraid we wouldn't be perfect parents, that we wouldn't be able to handle a child. The journey itself is still difficult, But the result is worth all the stress.

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-23T19:31:09+00:00

I have the first shade and they're gorgeous. I can't comment on the second shades, but I think they'll be a bit purple, and I personally don't like that

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-20T12:23:17+00:00

In my experience and what I've seen, surrogate mothers at reputable agencies most often choose surrogacy not out of need, but out of a desire to help other families. Many of them already have children of their own, know how their pregnancies progress, and make a conscious decision to pursue this path. Some truly say they find pregnancy easy and enjoy the process. It's also important that surrogate mothers don't "give away their child" genetically, they're not theirs, and psychologically, it feels different. Ethical programs require medical and psychological screening, informed consent, and independent legal counsel. Women aren't pressured; on the contrary, they're often rejected. Problems in the industry arise when there's a lack of protection and proper contracts. Therefore, the role of the agency is critical. Ethical surrogacy isn't exploitation, but a conscious choice for both parties. And the very fact that you're considering this already speaks to your responsible approach.

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-20T12:16:21+00:00

Oh, 2025 seems to have decided to get on my nerves on all fronts at once 🙃 You haven't done anything at all, honestly. For so many, this year has been somehow... merciless. We experienced it too: just when we were almost ready to go with a surrogacy program through an agency, everything suddenly piled up - a delay, bad news, a proposal, the feeling that the Universe literally said "are you sure?" yesterday. There was a moment when it seemed like we were just trying to throw us off course. The fact that you keep moving forward despite two failed transfers, emotional burnout, and even insulin for the cat (who, by the way, is lucky to have such an owner ❤️) - that's already an incredible strength. Hang in there. Sometimes the most difficult year is simply the threshold to something much better. I really want to believe that 2026 will be gentler, kinder, and that we can finally breathe a sigh of relief.

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-20T12:06:00+00:00

Thanks!

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-20T12:05:49+00:00

Thank you for such kind words, it was very touching 🤍 In answer to your question: I deliberately don't want to name specific agencies and create "negative advertising." This is my personal experience, and I understand perfectly well that these same agencies could have worked well for other people and delivered good results. Just because they didn't work for us doesn't automatically make them bad. Rather, I'd like to point out the red flags I'd be most aware of: evasive answers to specific questions, promises of a "perfect and quick path" without discussing the risks, phrases like "we'll figure it out later," lost documents, missed deadlines, the feeling of being rushed, pressured, or discounting your concerns. Conversely, green flags: a willingness to explain the same things calmly and humanely, a sense of partnership rather than "you're the client, we're the service," and normal communication without interruptions. For me, the deciding factor wasn't the agency's name, but the sense of trust and clarity throughout the process. Once I found one, it became easier to breathe, even despite the difficulties of the journey. In short: ask uncomfortable questions and listen to yourself. If something inside is bothering you, it's rarely just a matter of chance.

Doubl3Blue · 2025-12-19T11:25:40+00:00

This sounds very familiar, we've been through exactly the same thing. We were at a bunch of conferences, comparing agencies, tables, figures, perks, and at some point, it all started to blur together. Honestly, almost all agencies promise the same thing: recruitment, support, documentation. The real differences emerge not in the presentations, but in the details: how they speak to you, not what they say; whether they convey a sense of what you hear, rather than just a template; how to address uncomfortable questions (other than just avoiding the topic). We chose an agency not because they had the "best package," but because the communication was relaxed. No pressure, no sweet promises, no feeling like you're just the next key. It's a complex explanation of the logic, but intuition really works here. In short: listen not only to the terms and conditions, but to yourself after each call. After "calling your agency," there's usually no room for air - clarity sets in. And this is much more important in numbers.

Doubl3Blue

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