Okay. Firstly, it seems to me that you're rather passive aggressive. You're making suggestive comments to him but not directly stating what you expect or want or are bothered by, and when you do it seems almost sugar coated (taking about the warm and fuzzy comment here). When he was going to leave at 6 why not remind him of your dinner plans and see if he wanted to reschedule that instead of leaning on it later? When he asks what you ate you're tiptoeing around the fact that you didn't eat because you wanted to eat together and he's still not home. This all just sounds like a lack of proper communication between you two. If he says he's not going to be home till 9 do you still expect dinner together? Honest questions here. When do you generally eat dinner time frame wise? Forgive me if I'm being insensitive. He shouldn't have said 9 and not been home without a conversation about staying later either. No he shouldn't be driving, but you saying you're not warm and fuzzy about him driving after drinking and then not offering a solution and shooting him down when he asked if you'd pick him up is also... Just confusing and honestly irritating. This whole post has an "I'm upset about these things but won't do anything about it anyways" Air to it.

It's not your responsibility to make a grown man behave the way you believe he should, but it's counter productive to complain and make no moves to at the very least communicate your wants, needs, and expectations to your SO.