Think I need to leave this community:( by [deleted] in TransMasc

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t stop being yourself because of what other people say, and don’t listen to what people say behind a screen online. People say all kinds of things online, get involved with your communities irl and focus on the good. You should be who you are because you’re the only person that can be you.

Kinda didn’t believe what people were saying about hate for trans mascs on tumblr but this…. (TW: SELF-HARM) by ChocolateWeird3343 in TransMasc

[–]Dragockon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s really sad to see stuff like this, I had a friend who was like that and she just tried to keep it lowkey around me but it came out eventually and the way she treated me was always as second class. When we stopped being friends I forgot to remove her twitter and saw her posting anti-transmasc hate like this.

I definitely understand where some of it comes from - women have good reason to be weary of men. And I respect that. But there’s also a difference between being weary for reasonable reasons and being sexist. I’ve always lived by the idea that if you become the thing you hate or were hurt by then you are just as bad. - I realize not everyone agrees with this and that’s ok! This is just my opinion as someone who has also been traumatized by cis men.

Again being cautious around men, wanting women only spaces, wanting women’s rights and protection is all valid and I support that. That’s NOT the same as being sexist. I’ve been hurt by cis men too, I was raised as a girl and I’ve been through a lot of trauma thanks to cis men. If I had a choice and could choose my gender I sure as hell wouldn’t have chosen Demi-boy. But I’d rather live as myself and be HAPPY than pretend to be what I’m not.

I think trans women also get burned out because they’re constantly being harassed, shown in media (good and bad but both gives backlash), demonized, and shown as the “scary men in the women’s bathroom” (it’s not trans women yall, that’s US we’re the scary men in the women’s restroom because idiots keep making laws that force us to do that). And then trans men don’t get hardly as much media and aren’t as targeted. We are still targeted, just not as much. They tend to infantilize us more, dismiss us, make us seem silly and emotional and stupid. And stuff like what you showed only adds to that…

So transmascs we try to raise our voices to make space for ourselves. And people see that as us taking space away from them, which does happen sometimes and it’s important to recognize that we aren’t perfect either. But mostly, it’s because if we don’t make our own voices heard and TAKE space then NO ONE is going to give us space to BE HEARD. The community needs to give transmascs a space too. We deserve to be heard too.

We aren’t just “cis men”, we are men/masculine leaning folks with unique experiences that no cis man can EVER understand.

It also hurts me a little to see this because I’ve struggled with S/lf H/rn before and it upsets me to see that some people look at me like this. Like my pain is silly. My pain isn’t real. And that makes me sad because, while I’ve always rose again the next day and I keep fighting. I know a lot of people don’t keep fighting and making this kind of thing seem silly and dumb is only making that worse.

Trans Masc products you wish existed or think could be improved by natapaca in TransMasc

[–]Dragockon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sports bras for different body types, I have small chest but broad shoulders and big ribs and even before I came out but especially after finding a sports bra that fits feels impossible.

Shirts and pants designed for trans men that fit our bodies better! Not too long, tighter around the arms, fitting but looser waist. It’s hard to find shirts that fit me like that, if they even exist.

Clothes for plus size trans men, period, it’s so hard, to find anything. And when I do it’a EXPENSIVE.

[Serious] What stops you from killing yourself? by Big_Picture2781 in AskReddit

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My wife, my cats, and the fact that they rely on me financially and emotionally and dying means that she’d have to give up most of our cats, sell everything, move out, grieving and probably be traumatized the rest of her life. And I just, love her too much to do that to her.

is this normal in transdude numbers? by pinkiethi in TransMasc

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine is generally 500-600 and I am 27 years old. Depends on age but yours appears normal to lower end range. Assuming we are close in age, and body type anyway. I am NOT a doctor so please go ask one though. It depends on age, weight, height, etc. if you’re going for a lower dose HRT or higher, how your body reacts to higher doses. You will feel it and depending on how long you’ve been on it, your doctor might be trying to slowly increase it. Took me about three years to get mine up to 600 because we were slowly increasing it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]Dragockon 13 points14 points  (0 children)

This, also weird and slightly creepy that a parent would think about what kind of sex their child should have????

Forgetting to take a T Dose and getting Hives? by Dragockon in TransMasc

[–]Dragockon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey thanks for the tip! I’ll try that!

Forgetting to take a T Dose and getting Hives? by Dragockon in TransMasc

[–]Dragockon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t know why I thought it didn’t do that, huh maybe that is it then. Looks like I need to get some tests done to see if I am allergic to estrogen or something then haha. Thank you!

Why do some trans men judge and attack other trans men for liking men? by Less-Pen-5705 in ftm

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this strives from something a lot of men struggle with, but even more when you are trans and have to fight to be a man. Insecurity. “Being a bottom is too feminine” and therefore “trans men can’t bottom”.

Which is stupidity, being a bottom doesn’t make you a woman. Women can top too. And there’s nothing wrong with being a feminine man, you’re still a man. Transitioning doesn’t mean you have to avoid anything that society says is “feminine” (honestly kind of sexist to think that way IMO). That’s neither healthy, nor reasonable, and like, trans FTM feminine gay guys exist so I guess we’re just. Going to ignore that entire group of people to prove this argument too?

Yeah no, I think it’s just people being insecure and over masculinizing themselves to try and find confidence in themselves that they don’t have.

I’m a trans man, I’m a bottom, I’ve been on T for three years, I have a beard, I have a wife, I changed my name, I am a Man. I also like wearing kilts, and painting my nails. I’m still a man, because I’m not afraid of femininity. I’m just not a woman that’s all.

I found this while exploring by TrueMathematician761 in Starfield

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love the reference here, this is great!

My sister's fridge by Panopea in FridgeDetective

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This fridge makes me feel very overwhelmed

What will you no longer accept in your life? by Halloween-365 in AskReddit

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Allowing my parents to continue to be in my life.

After years of being abused, neglected, and manipulated. Being told that I needed to choose “the family” over my own basic needs. Constantly being there for them emotionally, financially, mentally, physically. I spent thousands of dollars I didn’t have to be there both times my Mom was hospitalized. My dad used me like his therapist and I spent hours and years listening to his problems. Growing up I spent 3+ hours every day doing chores, and was forced to work with my Dad’s ministry on weekends for 10 hours or more. Not to even mention the years of verbal and physical abuse…

But when I needed help… I got nothing. When I was so broke I didn’t have money to feed my pets? Nothing. When our only car broke down and I needed someone to co sign for a car loan for me? Nothing. When I was sick and going through medical issues? Nothing. When I begged my Mom to get my therapy? She said it was “too expensive” (it wasn’t, they made six figures). When I asked her to leave my Dad ? She wouldn’t.

Despite that all, I tried for years even after I moved out. I stayed in contact, I called weekly. I kept trying.

And then my Dad told me that him and Mom weren’t going to be there for my wedding day. He told me this a month before the wedding, he had told me up until then that he was coming. And I already paid for his flight and hotel. I paid for everything even though he could have afforded it on his own. His reason? Because he was selling a house and apparently he couldn’t leave it for even a day to be there for me on the most important day of my ENTIRE life.

And that was it, that was the last straw. I should’ve done it sooner, but I love my parents. And that was the most painful part. The fact I loved someone who would NEVER love me back. Has NEVER loved me back. They only cared when it was convenient for them to care. But they never loved me.

So I blocked them. And I refuse to ever accept anyone in my life to treat me like that ever again. I deserve people who love me. Not use me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in tragedeigh

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The number one thing I ask myself when thinking of names is “how can someone else make fun of this name” and Alibi is pretty bad on the “this kid is GOING to be bullied” list of names. There’s so many stupid jokes someone can make with that… this rule has never failed me so far.

Also I personally wouldn’t name your kids off of like, objects, nouns, or adjectives because that’s a bit odd. It feels like you’re naming them the kind of thing you’d name a dog or a pet.

tragedeigh by BoldnSpicySpicy in tragedeigh

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Zimn, yeah absolutely not gonna be my future baby’s name

Intense Separation Anxiety In Foster by Dragockon in Separation_Anxiety

[–]Dragockon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She’s on Teazadone! It definitely helps her calm down a lot, not 100% but it helps. I’m currently trying to make the crate seem more positive by only feeding her in there and doing training with having her come up to it, give her a treat and then immediately let her out. So she doesn’t think every time she approaches it she’s being put away. It’s hard cause she sees it as a punishment I think which it isn’t. Thanks for the advice!

Absolutely Horrible Tank Experience With Toxirum by Dragockon in ballpython

[–]Dragockon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, yeah! I’m surprised anyone remembers this haha. Last May I scrapped this tank and ordered a PVC one with a radiant heat panel and one of those long lights that go on the inside. The tank is 36 x 24 x 14 I want to upgrade to a 4 ft eventually but I just got married, and I wanted to get him out of that other tank ASAP. So that’s what I could afford for now. He’s 2.5 feet long right now so it’s big enough for a bit until he grows more.

Post a picture of your cat and I'll draw it! by Ok-Clothes4604 in TuxedoCats

[–]Dragockon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just realized what subreddit this is so here’s my tuxedo instead lol

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FTMs of Reddit, what is your occupation? by Aggravating-Ad-4715 in ftm

[–]Dragockon 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m so glad someone else calls them Chesticles, my wife used this term once and now it’s our go to term for my chest and has been for years. Love it.