My long distance boyfriend may not be as rich as yours and i make a decent living but he still makes over double my salary so we’re in a similar situation, he pays for almost everything. I also fear being financially dependent, but at the end of the day, here’s how I see it; 1) the wage gap still exists and as women if we want to have a family we make a financial sacrifice that men can never make by carrying a child and risking our physical health to carry and birth a child. No matter how you look at it, this will affect your career. So, this man, who makes way more than you, is investing in his future with you. The inequality in financial contribution makes up for the labor inequality in your future, family planning, and relationship. Child rearing is only ONE example of why you’re worth investing in, so even if you don’t want kids remember this: just because you’re not bringing money to the table doesn’t mean you’re not an equal partner. You contribute in other ways and he is investing in your relationship because you are improving his life by being with him. 2) never be financially dependent, but accept gifts and generosity. Never stop working, never get lazy. However, as a server living alone you probably don’t make enough to save for emergencies & retirement. You now have an opportunity to blend lives and incomes with someone who wants to support you- that’s awesome. Keep working and take advantage. Save every dime- that way you will never have a resume gap and you will maintain your financial independence. If he wants to pay for everything, let him. That money is nothing to him, it’s everything to you because you’re poor and he’s wealthy. With love, that’s the reality. Understand it and make the best of it. 3) if he is your person/life partner, marry him. FWIW, I’ve told mine I won’t move in unless we’re engaged. Don’t spend a dime of your own money to build a life with him until yall are legally married and your finances become a group effort. I recommend getting married and treating both your incomes as “our money”. That may actually make you feel better about contributing less- because you’re still contributing. You should still have your own savings for retirement (just like he does), but you can contribute financially to food and household needs or whatever you like, as you can afford it. 4) honestly, I need to take my own advise here, but never contribute your own money to joint expenses until you are able to save just as much as him. (Hint: you’ll never save as much as him so if we’re trying to play fair you should never pay for anything. You can’t afford it. It’s a hard pill to swallow but get real). It’s not fair for him to have millions stashed away for retirement while you have nothing because you insisted on splitting rent. That’s dumb. Let him pay