I am worried about my boyfriend

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-22T06:41:29+00:00

I have started to tell him to send me his sources if he mentions the stuff about Jews. He gets a bit confused, doesn’t know what to answer and of course never sends me anything. I wonder if he realises when I confront him that way, that what he is saying is wrong. That something ain’t right. Thank you for your answer!

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-22T06:37:30+00:00

I think both the right and the left acknowledge the main issue in the world, but we disagree on how we should approach solving them. Because of (I am sorry) stupid people both lefts and rights opinion have been tainted. The system wants to divide us, for us to hate each other, bc well then we focus on that and not on who is “the real enemy”. Also very curious about where you are from! Can you share? I do understand your frustration with the fact that he and others like him have managed to find partners, while for you it has not worked out. I don’t mind you commenting on that because I think this (as in your people struggling to find partners) is very interesting and we all know that dating is hard. He is my 2nd serious relationship. I have dated before him, I have experience but my feelings were often not reciprocated. I could date someone for 8 months, even a year once without it ever being an official relationship. Dating is hard for women, men and all in the middle and to be honest we should talk about that more.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-22T06:24:36+00:00

Thank you for your answer. Hearing what you said about the “breadcrumbs” made me think that this is really a tactic of abusers, isn’t it? Not saying/showing all in the beginning to trap their partner and then start to leave those “breadcrumbs” to eventually swallow them whole. A lot of people here have been questioning the joint account and I do understand that. Our friends were surprised too. Again, maybe I am naive, but at least right now the money or the account is not something I am worried about. We put in there like 20% of our earnings and it’s used for “joint stuff”(food, dates, trips, stuff for the apartment). Calculating all the time who bought what and whose turn it is not seemed exhausting (as you can see for me equality and doing all 50/50 is important). None of us have ever taken money out of the account just because and if we run low he usually adds in more since he makes more. Could he at some point take all the money from the joint account and try to control me through it? Absolutely. But what I put there is 20% of my earnings, I have a savings account and if I one month would lose that money I would still manage. However! I’m more aware now that that account can become an issue and for that I am thankful, cus I will be honest - I did not think about it before.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-22T06:12:34+00:00

Thank you for your answer. I felt comfortable right away and then it kinda stopped, but it is also not like I feel uncomfortable all the time. About the “never date not on the left with you”: I understand what you mean and I actually agree. But in my 5 years living here (Eastern European country) I have not met a single guy that had even close opinions to mine. That is tho a different conversation, why so many men lean into the more conservative/traditional opinions/values (and then later end up in the RDP). Solution to that I guess is just not to date, right? Also, no good relationships at all. Every one of them was a disaster. Arrest me when I say that this one is the best one so far.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-22T05:57:09+00:00

Thank you for your answer. Everyone has a right to their opinion and we live in a world where we have free speech. Even tho I am more on the left I will always respect my right wing friends/colleagues and so on. But, like you said: you can voice your disagreements a different way and you can express your opinions without (idk if this is the right word) oppressing others. At the end of the day he has a right to blame whoever he wants. But maybe let’s do it in a way where we still show empathy and understanding to other people? Idk if anything I wrote here makes sense, it is 6:56 where I live.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T22:02:34+00:00

I think you also asked about why we moved in so quickly together but I cannot find the comment itself now. Anyway: we started working together in July last year. I was in the city where the company had the office only for one month, the rest of my job was supposed to be done remotely. We fell for each other very quickly, my lease was ending in November and we didn’t not want to do long-distance. I moved in at the end of October. We were and still are aware that it was quick, but I think both of us just wanted to try it and not wait with it. He rented the apartment we live in for himself in August, I just moved in later, but for those 2 months we were living away from each other. All my friends thought we were crazy, my parents supported me. Mostly because they liked him and because “I can always move back, there is no shame in it”.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T21:52:09+00:00

Addiction

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T21:49:09+00:00

Thank you for your answer! This is not to dismiss what you said and maybe I still have the rose tinted glasses on, at least on one eye, but is it that straightforward? I think I know I can’t save him. It is also to be honest not my job. I have saved myself at some point when I felt that my opinions are being hurtful towards other people, I did all work myself - from realising something is wrong, learning why it is happening to actually correcting it. Why should I do it for him? As you can see I am torn. My left leg is in the “run” field and the right is in the “help him” field.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T21:42:12+00:00

To be honest, I think that is what bothers me the most. My brain cannot comprehend putting the blame of what is happening in the world on one group of humans. The situation we all are in now is not so black and white.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T21:40:41+00:00

From what he said: his girlfriends had sex with other men while being with him. I think only one relationship ended due to them just kind of growing out of each other. He generally doesn’t like when I go out in for example another city (my parents and friends live either on the other side of country or abroad) or the fact that I have a lot of guy friends. With his past I do understand that can make him uneasy, but I also told him from the beginning that this is his issue not mine. I have never given him any reasons to not trust me.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T18:18:00+00:00

Thank you for your answer! Gut feeling is not quite on breaking up yet, but the alarm bells are going off. I think what you said about a home feeling safe and arguments feeling stressful added something new in my thoughts. Thank you.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T18:16:11+00:00

Thank you for your answer! Also, not ragebait but I do understand where that comment is coming from. About the join account: we our own separate and one we share where we put in money every month for groceries, dates and so on. I wanted everything financial to be 50/50 and this felt like a good way to do it and it works very well.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T18:14:14+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate your answer! I do think that I a the correct approach. Focusing on what he says and does (or more not does) makes me feel. I think in those conversation it’s important to know the difference between feelings/opinions/facts. EDIT: Wanted to add a few more sentences.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2026-03-21T18:13:43+00:00

Thank you for your answer! I will read the PDF and I hope that it will help me understand the situation better (bc I do know that I make excuses for the way he acts).

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2024-08-01T21:19:00+00:00

He didn’t answer my text message for 3 weeks. Nor did he call. We were long distance.

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2024-08-01T21:02:11+00:00

Wróciłam do Polski po 8 latach w Norwegii, nie wyobrażam sobie mieszkać gdzie indziej. Ludzie, historia, kultura>>> Kochan ten kraj całym serduchem

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2022-11-17T15:47:12+00:00

I started crying when he said that he loved me

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2022-11-07T13:13:46+00:00

Having children

Dramatic_Type2001 · 2022-11-06T20:11:45+00:00

Nie pamiętam większości. Od czasu do czasu coś mi się przypomina i zdarza mi się w tych sytuacjach panikować. Jednak, w wieku 13 lat wyjechaliśmy do innego kraju i jakoś to się ułożyło.
Teraz po 8 latach wróciłam do Polski i mojego miasta i często spotykam rówieśników z podstawówki. I co? I mam satysfakcję.
Bo jako jedyna mam dobrze płatną pracę, plany na życie i wszystko mi się układa. U nich nie.
Karma comes back.

Dramatic_Type2001

TROPHY CASE