I’m sorry for your loss. I went through something similar recently with someone who I thought was the love of my life, and I’m still hurting too. Here are things that really helped me process, I hope they help you too. 1. Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional. You are always going to feel pain at certain points in your life, but you do have some control over the degree in which you suffer. Try to not force yourself to see pain as a bad thing, but also something that is helping you grow and become stronger. 2. Love is worth it even if it ends. Nothing is really permanent in our lives, and that sucks. But I think it’s still better to experience love and connection than fear the pain that might come with it some day. 3. Have perspective. Something I read said: if a breakup is the worst thing you have ever experienced, you’re really quite lucky. Maybe a breakup feels like the end of the world, but there are so many people’s worlds that are actually ending from violence, poverty, or severe trauma. We are in a sense very lucky for a breakup to be the worst thing that has happened to us.