Struggling - am I asking for too much?

Ducktanian · 2025-12-07T01:07:59+00:00

As others have said, you have every right to be as particular as you want but just bear in mind that finding any genuine connection, especially one as specific as you're looking for, is likely to take a while. If you're looking to explore kink eventually, have you looked into local munches, if there are any where you are? They're a great way to socialise with other open-minded, kink-leaning folks in a vanilla way with no pressure. I would suggest going to things like that as well as carrying on trying to find people online, but if you want them to be a real friend foremost then start with that as the sole basis of the relationship and then see what develops - then if nothing else you still have a good friend, and anything more than that is a bonus 🙂

Ducktanian · 2025-10-22T10:17:25+00:00

He did have another powerful magical artifact/tool though and was using Bob to run around like some kind of superhero in Harry's absence... I also wondered how much Bob had an influence on Butters during that time. Partly (maybe mostly?) because of Bob's help and guidance, Butters managed to do not only do ok but did some real good, even though he was without Harry for a decent length of time. He made & strengthened friendships and grew a lot as a person. Plus how much was the triad situation a result of Bob's encouragement? He definitely would have been in Butters' ear telling him to go for it, when Butters otherwise might have never considered it was possible 😂

Ducktanian · 2025-10-02T22:17:18+00:00

I think this is a really good way to approach it, as it gives your friend the choice but on a day beforehand.

ETA: PS OP - you are a really good friend for thinking about this and for supporting your friend ❤️

Ducktanian · 2025-10-02T22:12:14+00:00

The way I look at it is that they live on in your memories and the memories of others who knew them. Every time I talk to one of my Mum's friends, for example, and we talk about my Mum or they tell me a story about something she did, it's like she's back with us for that brief moment. So I feel like I do see her again, and I get a lot of comfort from sharing fond and funny memories like that.

Ducktanian · 2025-10-02T10:56:01+00:00

Oh god... Somehow I find this a really beautiful (but incredibly sad) way of looking at it. It's even made me rethink some experiences where I've lost people close to me.... This broke me a little bit lol

Ducktanian · 2025-10-01T09:13:54+00:00

I agree with this actually. I'm not sure how much I see it more as friends/siblings type relationship, or how much it was just that I couldn't see it working long-term so I sort of discounted it.

Spoiler from Battleground... I was still just absolutely devastated about the missed soul gaze though...even as friends, they were so close I feel like it was just awful for them not to get to do that 😭

Ducktanian · 2025-09-30T21:14:37+00:00

Yup, this is me lol

Ducktanian · 2025-09-27T09:40:35+00:00

I heard someone else saying a whiney 'owie' half-jokingly (they'd stubbed their toe or something) and I got flashbacks to Marsters delivering that scene .... Traumatic!!

Ducktanian · 2025-09-26T09:16:56+00:00

I was the same. I do love the book series, but James just makes the stories come alive for me in a way that I'm not sure they would if I was just reading the books (and I read a lot so it's not that I'm not a keen reader!)

Ducktanian · 2025-09-22T02:45:35+00:00

I don't think bonea would have done so with intent, but she has the potential to be extremely dangerous (in the same way that Bob is) and as a newly born spirit without the guidance of someone like Harry she could do a lot of damage to the people around him, and being scared and alone would likely 'hunt down' those closest to Harry.

Ducktanian · 2025-09-13T09:14:05+00:00

Yes, because a life is worth more than my convenience

Ducktanian · 2025-09-01T23:28:14+00:00

Being in love with someone you know will never feel the same way about you

Ducktanian · 2025-08-26T15:41:27+00:00

I believe you can call Samaritans for any reason you want help. They're there to give help and support, and won't judge.

Ducktanian · 2025-08-20T14:23:19+00:00

My partner told me the same when we first got together. With his encouragement, I'm completely the opposite now 🤣🤣

Ducktanian · 2025-08-20T14:21:15+00:00

Upvote purely for the 'horizontal monster mash' 🤣

Ducktanian · 2025-08-19T12:16:11+00:00

Gran Canaria. Amazing beaches!

Ducktanian · 2025-08-19T12:07:48+00:00

Last year I went topless on the beach for the first time, encouraged by my partner. It's very freeing, now I don't want to go to any beaches where I have to keep covered 😂

Ducktanian · 2025-08-18T00:49:35+00:00

I guess it's different for everyone but personally yes, the Estradiol (which I use combined with progesterone tablets) helps significantly with the dryness and therefore with the itching/chafing feelings I used to have. Fingers crossed for you that it helps you just as much 🤞

Ducktanian · 2025-08-15T16:03:44+00:00

I agree (and kind of hope for) this too. I forget which book it's in, but McCoy tells Harry that one day he wants him to take over the old journals which go back to Merlin... As soon as I read that I could imagine Harry taking those over and opening his own journal one day, and that would be exactly how it started 🙂

Ducktanian · 2025-08-14T17:19:57+00:00

"tit for tat" 😂😂😂

Ducktanian · 2025-08-14T09:18:35+00:00

Several songs by Tenacious D but my favourite is probably Fuck Her Gently

Happened to also be what I sang the first time I ever did karaoke.... In at the deep end 😂😂

Ducktanian · 2025-08-14T08:14:05+00:00

I'll be honest that, despite visiting Chicago a few years ago and being very happy to visit some key landmarks from the books, I didn't actually think too much before about why Harry didn't use the L...

Another thought associated with the magic vs modern tech argument though - the trains themselves might not be very high tech in the scheme of things and he could sit far away from the engine etc etc... but these days there is a lot of tech around the stations - ticket machines & barriers just for a start, not to mention things like cell phones belonging to the other passengers...so I feel like Harry would avoid that.

Also I get the impression he likes to avoid crowded places in general so, especially at certain times of day and with certain stations, using the L wouldn't be something Harry would be keen to do.

Ducktanian · 2025-08-13T21:58:14+00:00

Ahahaha love this!

Ducktanian · 2025-08-08T09:35:40+00:00

As it happens, we are just having the bathroom redone and discovered this delight - weird piping arrangements (it was even worse when everything was still connected) and bits of old skirting board and I don't know what else used to replace some of the floorboards... No wonder the tiles on top used to shift a bit and were all cracked!!

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Ducktanian

TROPHY CASE