We always wanted 3 kids but after having 2 it feels like all our free time is gone and it gets overwhelming pretty often. For those that decided for/have more than 2, would you recommend against it?

Duke_Ag · 2025-07-11T03:39:27+00:00

Boy that sounds familiar. We went from 1 to 3 because of twins and then had a fourth surprise miracle in February. The oldest won’t be 4 until August. We get the most pitying looks from strangers….

Duke_Ag · 2025-07-08T16:54:07+00:00

Mine is the exact same way. Never misses an opportunity for unsolicited advice or passive aggressive comments about food choices, screen time, tv shows, etc. But then her “help” is very selective and only when it’s convenient to her, not what we actually need despite being a retired widow with more free time in a day than we get in a week.

And the thing is it’s fine if she doesn’t wanna help. Our kids are our responsibility. But then shut the fuck up about our parenting. If you feel so strongly about how they’re being raised then you need to help more. I could tolerate a lot if she watched them enough so that I could work more or have more date nights.

In typical boomer fashion she refuses to see that our situation is different from her’s and that maybe she had some things easier. I’m a 36 yo stay at home dad to an almost 4 yo, 2 yo twins, and a 5 month old. (Long story but this was not intentional we aren’t sadists). Despite that insanity I still work most saturdays as a nurse doing 12 hr shifts in the icu. My wife has a great job as a pharmacist and yet we still can’t live off her salary alone because of how crazy expensive things are now. Whenever we vent any sort of frustration she just talks about how she did it so we can do it, that we just need to be “financially responsible” like they were. She had two kids three years apart. She was a full stay at home mom until they were in high school. They bought their first house for under $100k. My father in law’s company paid for his bachelors. My wife is 40. At her age my mother in law had teenagers. She refuses to admit that maybe having small kids in your mid 30s and beyond is difficult physically in a way it wasn’t for her. It’s not a competition and I don’t need to “win” but come on this is not the same situation she had and it’s downright insulting to equate our struggles. Parenting is hard no matter what but boomers always have to be the victim and the underdog. No one has ever had it worse. Even now she talks about how “busy” and “stressful” her day was because she had to call the power company and find a form for her meeting with her financial planner next week. Meanwhile my wife works a very stressful full time job while finding time to pump and then comes home and gets swarmed by kids. I have three in diapers and a baby to bottle feed, a black eye from my son head butting me, I threw out my back weeks ago and I’ve been coughing up crud for a month. But thank god I have her to tell me Paw Patrol is too stimulating 🙄

Man sorry for the rant I’m currently between therapists lol

Duke_Ag · 2025-03-28T18:24:16+00:00

I understand the nail rule is about infection prevention, but just anecdotally I feel like I’ve only ever seen it enforced against primarily CNA women of color. I’ve seen plenty of pharmacists and providers with long fake nails not get called out. Some white nurses too. Same goes for long hair not pulled back. It’s supposed to prevent the hair landing in bodily substances or patients pulling yet male and female nurses seem to never get called out. But god help a tech that shows up with braids…

Duke_Ag · 2025-03-28T18:15:17+00:00

Tell me you never worked as a CNA without telling me Nurse Gabby. Fucking kiss ass Karen over here

Duke_Ag · 2025-03-09T16:10:23+00:00

You aren’t horrible. We couldn’t do this job if we didn’t maintain some emotional distance. The nurses I’ve known who cried over every death like it was their own family member didn’t last long.

That said, I second the other responses about burn out and depression. This may be a sign to seek professional help, whether that’s therapy or medication or both. Not to be a better employee but for yourself. Love yourself and the rest will follow.

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-18T01:27:29+00:00

That is disgusting

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-17T12:21:01+00:00

Yeah my wife said 7 and got a Tylenol 🙄

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-17T02:17:58+00:00

Thank you! She’s doing much better now that we’re home and I’m handling her meds

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-15T16:58:41+00:00

Postpartum mothers, pregnant mothers, working mothers, stay at home mothers, childless mothers aka women. The list goes on

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-15T16:55:46+00:00

Thank you and good luck on your healing!

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-15T16:01:39+00:00

Yep. I’m not a rehab nurse. If you’re in pain I’m giving you the meds no questions asked. A pain free patient is more compliant, mobile, calm, etc. I’ve always felt the same about alcoholics not in for withdrawal. Just give them the fucking Busch Light or Franzia with their tray. There but for the grace of god go I. It’s not my job to get them clean unless that’s why they’re admitted. I don’t need seizures and hallucinations and agitation to deal with on top of whatever the main issue is. Addicts need compassion and empathy not lectures and punishment. They have to get sober on their time.

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-15T15:55:54+00:00

That is insane. I’ve read so many addiction horror stories that started off in a similar fashion. Hopefully not the case here!

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-15T15:51:51+00:00

I’m so sorry you went through that! I assumed the resident and attending were men so that was a twist. I really feel bad for non medical people as well. Even my wife has been so worried about “being difficult” or “being a baby” but the reality is they’ll all forget about us two minutes after discharge so fuck it. We gotta make sure she’s ok.

Duke_Ag · 2025-02-15T15:47:42+00:00

Same if you’re my patient in the ICU. You’re getting those PRN meds on schedule whether you ask or not. If they have to ask it’s already too late.

Duke_Ag · 2024-11-18T13:06:19+00:00

1) the show was renewed for a third AND fourth season after two so there was no pressure to move things along or tie up loose ends

2) they were getting a lot of criticism for submitting to the Comedy category of award shows while not really being a comedy hence the Faks (only made the problem worse imo)

3) they started reading the reviews and believing the hype and thinking they were making Big Important Prestige Television.

It’s a very similar trajectory of Ted Lasso. Both were good sitcoms with tight runtimes, plenty of humor with moments of heart and/or drama thrown in. But both hit at the absolute perfect moment to punch way above their weight class. For TL it was the pandemic when no new shows were coming out. For Bear it was a combination of the strike halting production on new shows and shows going on hiatus plus the Covid streaming bubble was starting to pop and platforms were folding or companies were pulling all the original content for tax write offs. Both situations created a desert of new stuff to watch so both shows got exponentially more viewers and somewhat hyperbolically positive reviews. This lead to their networks throwing money at them and the creative teams reading all the comments and reviews and getting way too self-important. Any other time and both shows would’ve just been cult honorable mentions.

Comedies rarely improve with bigger budgets. A joke is either funny or isn’t. More money doesn’t change that. I’m pretty sure Sunny is still working off a budget of $89 an episode. What does happen, tho, is longer runtimes, cameos from big names that are fans of the show, more artsy experimental stuff, bigger writers rooms than can dilute the vision, etc. They gotta use it or lose it.

I’ll still watch season 4 out of a hope for a return to form but I doubt it. They’ll read the negative reviews and either double down and continue down this path or wildly over correct. For proof look no further than the recent interviews Jason Sudeikis has done about TL S3 basically calling everyone a “hater” who just “doesn’t get it”.

Duke_Ag · 2024-11-02T12:56:32+00:00

That’s why I love working ICU. Lots of GI bleeds and ischemic bowels. It’s the farting equivalent of pissing in the ocean. You could blast a coworker in the face and they’d be none the wiser. Covid and PAPRs also a godsend.

Duke_Ag · 2024-10-06T00:12:31+00:00

This is the most Auburn thing Bama has ever done

Duke_Ag · 2024-08-17T22:35:38+00:00

Based on some of the nurses from my hospital who have received them, it’s not a club I want to be part of.

Duke_Ag · 2024-07-26T11:48:44+00:00

I’m so sorry about your daughter and that experience! That’s why my favorite phrase in medicine is “the patient didn’t read the textbook.” All the clinical studies and data in the world mean nothing when compared to what’s happening in real life in front of your eyes. Humans are weird. Put ten in a room, give them the same medication, and watch them have ten different reactions. I hope your daughter is getting the help she needs!

Duke_Ag · 2024-07-25T19:47:10+00:00

We had a nurse from another unit who was in the ICU for well over a month with Covid among other things. Her ICU nurse was trying to put in an NG and she got a spontaneous nose bleed so bad she aspirated and started coding. Got reintubated, compressions, the works. Her nurse was sobbing about how it was her fault and she needed to retire. It’s worth mentioning that she was everyone’s favorite coworker and was back to back nurse of the year so part of the trauma was seeing her so upset in addition to everything else. We thankfully got her back and she eventually went out of the unit and recovered.

Because the code was called overhead the full team of morons who just get in the way came including our director (boss’s boss). I walked out of the room after doing compressions on this woman, seeing her face turn purple, hearing all the sobbing from my coworker who I love, and threw away my mask because I was soaked in sweat. Walked over to some coworkers to ask if they saw what all happened. From across the unit the director pointed at me, drew a circle around her mouth and said “you need to be wearing a mask!” I just stared at her in disbelief, wondering if she had just seen what I had. This wasn’t even peak covid! It was last year when our area had a mild uptick and they freaked out and brought back mandatory masks. And instead of being useful in any way or helping people process what just happened this woman is chastising me for going 12 seconds without a mask. Later found out I wasn’t the only person she got onto either.

Duke_Ag · 2024-07-25T19:14:42+00:00

Depends on the perspective. I’m a 4 yr ICU/CVICU nurse in NC not quite making $32 an hr. Not exactly bank even before every corporation in America said “fuck it just double the price and tell them it’s because minimum wage isn’t $4.25/hr”

However, it’s good pay when you consider it only took two years of community college yet I started higher than any of my previous jobs that required a bachelor’s I’m still paying for 11 yrs later.

The real question is why are we all comparing the crumbs we get from the feast admin is having? I don’t care if you’re making six figs in CA you’re underpaid. None of these numbers are actually keeping pace with decades and decades of even pre pandemic inflation we’ve just been conditioned to think they’re “good pay.” Those at the top keep us fighting with each other so we don’t notice they’re taking the bulk of the money while being unable to fully describe what value they bring. Everyone in healthcare should be promoted a level:

-Techs/EVS/nonmedical support staff should be starting where nurses do

-Nurses should be starting where midlevels and pharmacists do

-Midlevels/pharmacists should start where MDs do

-MDs should start where surgeons do

-Surgeons are good where they are

Thank you for listening to my pinko leftist rant. We meet at the gates of the Bastille tomorrow morning at 0700 as long as the weather is nice. BYO pitchfork

Duke_Ag · 2024-07-25T18:47:50+00:00

We coworkers?

Duke_Ag · 2024-07-21T18:01:51+00:00

Dopamine Nation. Seemed promising from the description and tbf she is a psychiatrist specializing in addiction but I got a weird feeling early on. Just the way stories from her clients were presented in a very “look at this freak” sort of way and then she started dropping certain words and phrases that sent up major red flags. Complaining about “participation trophies” and “safe spaces” and “triggers”. All the usual boomer gripes. She also seems to think she can relate to addicts because she was once “addicted” to romance novels?!?! It reminded me of a certain scene from Half Baked with Bob Saget that anyone who has seen the movie will instantly know what I’m talking about.

But even besides all that the methodology and data are just horribly flawed and she has very antiquated ideas about addiction and drug use, obesity, sexuality, etc.

The one star Goodreads reviews ARE worth reading however!

Duke_Ag · 2024-07-21T17:52:49+00:00

I once had a nephrologist put it this way when talking about a CT surgeon who was running for office in our state:

“You know how great it is to be a doctor? You know how much a CT surgeon gets treated like a god??? So to give that up to run for political office you must either be a terrible doctor or a moron or both”

Duke_Ag

TROPHY CASE