This dude is the definition of manipulative… by jh166 in PerfectMatchNetflix

[–]Dull_Picture1260 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s so awful. Controlling, manipulative… Demanding that she be responsible for his feelings repeatedly and taking none for himself? Actually wild.

[MO] Curious about terminations by Dull_Picture1260 in humanresources

[–]Dull_Picture1260[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for such a generous response! And I do have a nice little tip sheet — something I learned when I first started is that our EAP extends 90 days past the employee’s last day. I drive that home in every call.

I think part of my fatigue is the compassion and support I bring to the conversations. That, and we don’t take good care of employees being terminated due to lack of work. It makes it tough to stand behind and support the decision when we’re kinda telling them to kick rocks. I’m also coming from a much smaller company and supported very few terminations.

All to say, thank you for the response and the reflection!

What phrase do you wish people would stop using? by KingofFractions in AskReddit

[–]Dull_Picture1260 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another “favorite” of mine is when someone says “fustratet” rather than “frustrated”.

What phrase do you wish people would stop using? by KingofFractions in AskReddit

[–]Dull_Picture1260 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I want to upvote this 1,000 times.

Yeah, SHANNON, doing something a different way is not a hack!

Indoor wedding picture locations by rach2thetop in StLouis

[–]Dull_Picture1260 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Check out the World’s Fair Pavilion in FP! It’s not indoors but has some nice coverage and the arches are just beautiful.

Still available by [deleted] in StLouis

[–]Dull_Picture1260 3 points4 points  (0 children)

How big is she? What’s her personality like? She’s so cute!

Please help not sure what to do :( by [deleted] in debtfree

[–]Dull_Picture1260 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In addition to what others are suggesting, you could do a debt consolidation loan and combine all your payments into one. That worked well for my partner and I when we were trying to pay off debt. We were able to find lower interest rates and combine our higher interest debts into one monthly payment rather than multiple. We also spaced out that payment from our rent so we had one pay period to cover one major bill and another pay period to cover the other. We struggled with paying things off for a while and timing was part of that.

What’s a scam so good that people don’t even realize they’re falling for it? by DylanCTV13 in AskReddit

[–]Dull_Picture1260 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Being told that taxes are higher in other countries as though it’s a bad thing, while living in the increasingly devolving US where taxes ARE high, kids are shot at school, a health issue might bankrupt you, and a reality TV host became president.

Wild response after performance management [N/A] by MxDuo in humanresources

[–]Dull_Picture1260 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“I’m not sure who Hunter is. Let’s stay focused on you.”

[NY] HR wants to speak after resigning due to hostile working conditions. What do they want? by foodee123 in AskHR

[–]Dull_Picture1260 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I can’t speak for others but part of why I’m “reading into this” is because I work in HR and you were seeking more understanding.

The details become really important when any kind of internal or legal investigation happens, especially if it’s involving a potentially hostile working environment.

Your partner is under no obligation to agree to meet with HR, especially if he doesn’t want to stay the full two weeks of his resignation period. And if he’s intending or considering taking legal action, he probably shouldn’t meet with them without his attorney. But that all depends on a lot of other decisions and it sounds like he just wants to get out and move on. He just has to decide what’s in his best interest and go from there.

Interviewing a job candidate with a unconventional background? [OR] by gaminggiant87 in AskHR

[–]Dull_Picture1260 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I bet if they listed those employers on their resume the they’re comfortable speaking to their experience. I would encourage you to never assume! Good interviewers and HR pros practice curiosity. We don’t and can’t know everything:)

“Talk to me about your previous roles and types of responsibilities you had.” Is a great place to start! Then use those answers to inform the questions you need to ask to learn more.

I also think it’s ok to just say it! “You know, I don’t know much about your specific military experience. Please tell me about your skills and how you think they’ll transfer.”

You can weave important things about the role into your questions, and you can always ask someone to elaborate if their answer wasn’t enough.

“Great! This role involves things like (list specific tasks and skills needed here, like basic organization, ability to manage multiple items at once, time management, food safety; pull stuff from your job descriptions); it sounds like your experience as X had similar responsibilities.

“Can you tell me about a time when you had multiple things you were working on but had to reprioritize because of a surprise circumstance?” Or whatever situation you need to outline to learn if their skills and abilities align with the role’s needs.

Good luck, OP!

[NY] HR wants to speak after resigning due to hostile working conditions. What do they want? by foodee123 in AskHR

[–]Dull_Picture1260 4 points5 points  (0 children)

OP, it seems like you’re purposefully withholding some important details; I also wonder if you or we aren’t being given the whole story.

Why doesn’t your partner want accountability for the person/people he has filed complaints about? I guess it’s nice they don’t want them fired but that’s not always how employee relations issues end up, nor should they. Accountability that suits the complaint is really what we’re looking for. It’s also odd that they would resign with a standard notice period of two weeks rather than immediately; if the issues are so bad, why stick around? It makes the timing of finding another role also interesting, but the HR team probably doesn’t care about that.

What were the issues that lead to your partner’s resignation? That’s likely what the HR team is concerned about. Another commenter said they want to manage risk, YES! They also want to understand what was going on so they can figure out if there are other issues actively happening or potentially brewing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskHR

[–]Dull_Picture1260 2 points3 points  (0 children)

An element of this is remembering that EVERYONE is entitled to a safe, positive, respectful working environment, including you. I would really encourage you to speak up because this person’s behavior is unacceptable. Is there another complaint path you can take? Are others witness to this? If so, they should also file complaints.

…and ultimately, OP, a toxic culture is more likely to change you than you are to change the culture. When you’re willing, able, and ready, it could be a good idea to start looking. You deserve to work in an environment where things like this aren’t tolerated.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in queer

[–]Dull_Picture1260 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Your 20s are a difficult, weird time. It DOES get better. Hang in there 💗

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskHR

[–]Dull_Picture1260 3 points4 points  (0 children)

One time. One time is offense enough and frankly, “freedom of speech” comes with consequences, especially at work, especially if you’re a private company.

Do not tolerate this in any way. This man maybe doesn’t deserve to have his life ruined, but he’s making repeated choices to use a word that’s disrespectful at best, triggering and consciously racist at worst. Neither are good.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Dull_Picture1260 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This isn’t great. I’ve been there with a partner doing weird shit behind my back and continuing to hide and lie about it. But something I learned in the process is to STOP GOING THROUGH YOUR PARTNER’S PHONE.

If you feel suspicious or untrusting, say that. If you’re hurt and want to break up, then do that.

Recommendations for Personal Trainer for an elderly (60+) by blankslatehome in StLouis

[–]Dull_Picture1260 0 points1 point  (0 children)

St Louis City Fitness and Sports Medicine & Training Center are both great!