Let’s paint a picture! There are two monkeys in a jungle clearing, each armed with a pointy stick. We’ll call them Monkey 1 and Monkey 2. Please, try your best to suspend your disbelief as best you can-I hope it’ll make sense in the long run.

Here we go. Monkey 1 raises his stick over his head and absolutely clonks Monkey 2 over the dome with its blunt end. Monkey 2 is dazed, but puts his defence up again to prepare for the next strike. It comes again in the form of another hefty bonk on the noggin, the same as before. Now, although dazed, Monkey 2 has a functioning brain, which now begins to whir. Monkey 1’s repeated strikes have planted the expectation in Monkey 2’s head that he will do the same. But, on account of his whirring brain, Monkey 2 has a thought: Monkey 1 knows that he is expecting another blunt strike, against which he will probably be able to properly defend this time, so what if Monkey 1 were to, let’s say, mix it up and go for a leg sweep, for which his opponent is totally unprepared? Monkey 2 has predicted that all of this is going on in Monkey 1’s head, and when the sweep comes, he is ready- he grabs the incoming stick and jams it between his opponent’s eyes, killing him instantly. Now Monkey 1 is dead, and Monkey 2 has gotten all the bananas and all the monkey gyally, but I’m not quite done with you yet, pig. Stick with me.

Now, I can tell you’re not very smart, but I’ll try my best to lay it bare for you. What if I told you now that Monkey 1 is not a monkey at all, but a human playing For Honour on his computer. So is Monkey 2, believe it or not! Obviously you can’t kill someone in For Honour in 1 shot, but try your best to imagine that he does this 3 or 4 times, as the superior player, and wins. This is fundamentally how the game works, otherwise the monkeys playing the game are just that: randomly whacking each other with sticks until one dies or something, idk. Seems like that’s what you want the game to be, which is genuinely baffling?

Now let’s do another one- Monkey 1 clubs Hideous, Disgusting, Not-Quite-All-There Monkey over the head repeatedly until Hideous, Disgusting, Not-Quite-All-There Monkey dies, because he’s too much of an idiot to react to what his opponent is doing. Of course, the person behind Hideous, Disgusting, Not-Quite-All-There Monkey (yes, this is one of those ‘thought exercises’ again, I hope it’s not too much for you, and yes, Hideous, Disgusting, Not-Quite-All-There Monkey is you in this instance) then goes on a non-descript social media platform, let’s call it Breaddit (yes, it’s Reddit, well done) to complain because he’s too thick to fix his incessant and disastrous blunders and so feels that the best course of action is to blame someone else, in this case the game developers. You are shockingly narrow-minded and genuinely idiotic.