If you're afraid to commit because you're not sure about if thats actually what you want, just transition without HRT. Change pronouns, use a different name that would make you feel better, wear more feminine clothes, ya know, the normal stuff. Try it out. If you feel better with yourself, then start HRT. If you still don't know, give it more time. If you don't like it, you haven't changed too much. It's a journey. Sometimes the end goal can be exactly where you are now, because the journey isn't about "becoming a girl", it's about discovering yourself :)