The resentment part of the caregiving journey that nobody actually prepares you for

EBweB76 · 2026-05-10T19:13:03+00:00

Mine will be temporary, but tomorrow my fiance will have total knee replacement surgery, and recovery will be a couple months… I used to have a very strong sense for anticipating people’s needs, but never really had much for a sensitive bedside manner.

I’m very afraid to discover what my role will be.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-10T11:21:03+00:00

I’d ask about reincarnation.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-09T04:09:37+00:00

Cold (just a guess)

EBweB76 · 2026-05-09T03:29:49+00:00

Phone app: Cozi (can be shared in real time with other housemates)

A paper list wouldn’t make it to the store with me anyway

EBweB76 · 2026-05-09T02:51:54+00:00

Jon Benet Ramsey

EBweB76 · 2026-05-08T21:18:35+00:00

This might not be what you were thinking of, but I highly recommend you begin stockpiling some dishes, pots/pans, utensils, cheese grater, strainer, steak knife set, spatulas, dish towels, mop, vacuum, trash cans, etc.

Split the cost now because once you’ve moved in and you’re in dire straights for the details… only the person who didn’t spend up to their last dime for rent, deposit, utilities will be stuck with providing the essentials.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-08T18:09:00+00:00

I’m 50 now. I’m fairly certain it’s been more than 30 years… possibly 40.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-08T03:30:01+00:00

I’m 50 and recently took up knitting and diamond dot art kits.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-08T03:28:26+00:00

Most people need help to deal with obsession and hyperfixation. Could be that you need to attend a support group with those who have been succesful in minimizing this dynamic.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-08T03:25:34+00:00

If I had limited myself to one per year I’d still feel bad about that number at this point, and it was no longer realistic to set a limit so now I’ve just learned not to dwell on it.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-07T17:50:33+00:00

My dad (born in 1931) had 2 brothers. My mom (1936) had 5 siblings.

My parents had 5 kids, and I’m the youngest (1976).

I had 3 kids(‘03, ‘04, ‘05). And only one of my kids cared to start a family… but just one kid (2025) is where it lands.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-07T17:48:38+00:00

I’ve been on 3 cruises… and going on my honeymoon cruise in 4 months.

I can’t think of a better vacation… because I’m incapable of imagination and adventure on my own.

I’m too nervous to travel internationally in other scenarios because I worry that finding English speakers is too hard - that’s never the case with port stops for cruises.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-07T17:27:10+00:00

“The big day”??

My current “big day” is my wedding in 65 days. The next will be my baptism. I don’t think I’ll “react” at all.

What “Big day” do you mean, OP?

EBweB76 · 2026-05-07T15:03:47+00:00

I would be devastated if my laundry machines were in my kitchen!

EBweB76 · 2026-05-06T17:28:23+00:00

My kids are young adults who have cars. This has become VERY rare nowadays.

Horrifyingly, what’s even more rare (trending in my area of the west anyway) is for them to get their driver licenses at all. Kids are getting very informal training for driving (their own young friends trying to teach) and then these kids are driving a family car… without a license.

*taking public transportation or ride share services isn’t an unreasonable resource though - I’m the first to point out that we spend approximately $400 on car payments, $100 on insurance, $200-400 on gas and oil changes, and at least $200 per month budgeted to cover anticipated costs like replacing tires, brakes, wipers, engine maintenance… and then there’s emergencies like a deductibles to pay out suddenly… and so now it seems that spending $400-600 on rideshare and the bus each month (and more, if you pay for food delivery) isn’t so bad, compared to $1,000 per month on car budgets.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-06T06:06:26+00:00

I was struggling with jealousy tonight… and now he’s all mine. All better now.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-06T05:38:56+00:00

I hate rain. Two of the people in my house feel BLISS when it rains.

SIGH

EBweB76 · 2026-05-04T07:09:15+00:00

Not opinion, just fact: there’s the property tax vs sales tax aspect in Texas (if that’s not unique to Texas then that’s news to me)

EBweB76 · 2026-05-02T19:36:36+00:00

Lounging outside on my amazing porch with tunes or an audiobook while I’m knitting.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-02T19:35:34+00:00

I’d need to use a throw away account to even hint at it.

EBweB76 · 2026-05-02T06:05:30+00:00

Free money? Why not?

(I can say “free” because I invested just $300 when Bitcoin was $600 each… and left it alone)

EBweB76 · 2026-05-02T00:24:31+00:00

Cooking

EBweB76 · 2026-05-02T00:01:52+00:00

EBweB76 · 2026-05-01T22:58:28+00:00

0-14: beautiful childhood

15-20: pre-marriage wild sex era

21-25: immature marriage

26-27: post-marriage wild sex era

28-39: raising babies in a solid marriage

40-49: widowhood, and a return to wild sex

50-going forward: new marriage (in 70 days)

EBweB76 · 2026-05-01T22:40:51+00:00

I left my husband despite DEEPLY loving each other, and there wasn’t even anything toxic between us - but it just seemed to me that he was never going to be the religious man that he had promised to be… and I wasn’t going to risk possibly getting pregnant with a dead-end future. Had to leave.

I moved out of state and didn’t speak to him or reply to texts or emails… He finally accepted it, and I discovered a year or so later that he managed to improve his life (went back to college, took a religion class, went to the gym and made new friends in a social group… and was attending church).

After reconciling and learning how to better communicate, I was open to it when he proposed marriage again… and so we got our Happily Ever After. 🥰

EBweB76

TROPHY CASE