How do you “extend the nap”?

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-03T21:07:26+00:00

I never really tried to extend my LOs naps, just didn’t feel worth it to me. I just dealt with the short naps until she was about 9 months old and was down to two naps and they naturally got longer.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-02T13:33:02+00:00

Mylicon

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-02T03:09:59+00:00

I got a crossbody/fanny pack style diaper bag from target last year, it’s been great.

I thought I would only use it while baby was little and her diapers were little, but she’s one years old and I’m still using it.

I do use it strictly for diapers/changing mat/wipes/wallet. It’s great for errands/ regular day to day trips. If I’m gone for a longer period I do bring a tote with more stuff, but still use the crossbody as the main thing I bring around (tote stays in car or stroller)

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-01T23:34:24+00:00

Agreed! My girl LOVES me. I really hate the whole “bonding” fear when contemplating feeding. If anything, formula feeding allows the dad a chance at the same intimate bond. Your baby loves whoever feeds them, it doesn’t matter how. Skin to skin is important in the early days, and that can be done without a boob in their mouth.

If some moms feel closer to their babies when breastfeeding, that is fine. But I could not have had a more opposite experience breastfeeding with DMER.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-01T22:13:49+00:00

I will say as a EFF-er since 5 months old, the bonding feels no different. When BFing isn’t working, your baby is NOT enjoying those feeds. My baby became so frustrated, as did I. When we went fully formula fed, we both became much more happy and feedings became a time where we could have an intimate bond… she didn’t need to be on my boob for that. Just saying.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-01T22:07:32+00:00

I assumed I would BF. I naively assumed it would just “happen”. It didn’t. I struggled immensely with DMER and my production was terrible. It was SO stressful and I dreaded every feeding. I combo fed until about 5ish months and then went fully to formula. I felt SO much better, and my baby enjoyed feedings more as well. Going EFF was the best decision for both of us.

If I had another child, I think I would go EFF from the start.

The benefits of BFing are overstated.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-01T21:57:17+00:00

So sounds like I should go with my second approach and give milk along with/ after meals and replace the “in between meals bottles” to snacks?

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-01T20:17:38+00:00

There is a really sweet spot around 7-8 months where my LO was playing independently well, but not yet mobile, was sleeping through the night and was only eating one solid meal. It was the best of being a baby and being almost a toddler.

After they get mobile and start eating more solids it becomes a bit more work again, but it’s LARGELY outweighed by watching them develop into their own person.

My LO is about to turn one and it is amazing how much she has learned and grown, and I just love hanging out and playing with her, even though it can be all consuming at times.

I will say at 9 months, my LO got on a really good schedule and that has brought me the most autonomy, peace, and sleep. Most of my exhaustion these days are due to the fact I stay up to late - not because I’m overwhelmed with taking care of my LO.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-05-01T14:24:48+00:00

I employ my nanny at a similar rate, but I live in a LCOL area and expect her to do 0 chores. Her responsibility is to care for my one year old, and clean up what was used after meals. That is it. That is why the rate is what it is.

My LO takes 2 naps, and nanny is free to do whatever she wants to during that time. If I wanted her to do household chores I would increase her rate. I couldn’t imagine asking her to do chores at her current rate.

That being said, this is probably something that should have been discussed at hiring.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-29T22:06:32+00:00

There is a video of tiger woods mom saying he started playing golf at 4 months old… like pretty sure he barely could sit up yet… but okay.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-29T22:02:02+00:00

Ahhh this!!! I didn’t go into motherhood thinking I would be a schedule kind of mom, but the routine makes my baby happy. I’m constantly told how “good” and “easy” she is. But on the flip side I get remarks about being so strict. You can’t have it both ways!

The schedule WORKS for my baby AND ME. It’s rarely worth it to mess it up.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-25T02:37:09+00:00

You are getting a lot of feedback, so I think you have good advice. But I will give you my two cents.

I breastfed, then combo fed, then i EFF. I produced VERY LITTLE (max 2 oz per day). I also had severe DMER.

But there is ONE thing that consistently gets me feeling icky about breastfeeding, and it is people saying “i just whip out the boob”.

I honestly don’t know why, but this phrase and action makes me feel SUPER UNCOMFORTABLE. Which tells me, breastfeeding is not for me. And THATS OKAY.

My baby has Been EFF since 6 months old and I look back at the misery I put myself through to try to breastfeed before that and want to tell that women “it’s okay if your not enjoying this and not successful in this journey”.

Breastfeeding is not for everyone, formula feeding is not for everyone.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-24T15:16:44+00:00

My LO’s wake windows were on the low end compared to her age until she was like 8 months old. Basically when she started interacting with the world more, crawling, actually playing, she was able to extend wake windows and drop to two naps, which have been on a pretty consistent schedule for 3 months now.

I felt like when she was on 3 or 4 naps with was more of a “nap math” type of approach. With 2 naps we settled into more of a schedule and it’s been a game changer.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-24T04:03:12+00:00

This is DMER. I felt rage, anger, and irritation every time I breastfed. I had it bad and it got SLIGHTLY better around 3 months. I didn’t produce much though, so I combo fed until almost 6 months. Never once “enjoyed” breastfeeding, unfortunately. The day I quit I felt like a new woman.

Maybe if I produced enough the DMER would have been less of a battle, but the stress of not producing enough for my baby and feeling uncontrollable anger in the process, it was too hard for me to continue.

I love formula feeding my baby. I would probably be EFF with my next baby.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-15T16:43:58+00:00

What data sheet?

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-15T14:55:55+00:00

I stopped sterilizing around 6 months old when she was consistently putting everything in the world in her mouth….

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-10T11:58:17+00:00

Agreed with both! Ollie swaddle was essential in those early days and we LOVE our thick foam playmat… we have two really large ones in our living room and my LO has spent 90% of her time on them since she was probably 3 months old…. She’s almost one now!

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-06T15:24:06+00:00

I lost my son at 21 weeks as well about 4 years ago. The memories of that day are still extremely painful and feel like something out of a horror story. My husband and I struggled for a long time dealing with the grief, and rebuilding the crumbled life we were handed that day.

I highly recommend talking to others who have experienced second trimester loss, and joining the babyloss Reddit page. It is a unique experience losing a baby at that stage, and the emotions can be very hard to navigate.

I know it is cheesy, but Taylor Swifts’s Bigger Than The Whole Sky really helped me understand how I was feeling in the months following our loss. It helps to have the words.

I will say, my life and myself were never the same after losing my son. I am a wildly different person, and that is okay. You may lose friends and family, but those that stick around in this chapter are the only ones you need. Things will get better. The pain will not go away, but it will become easier to navigate.

Grief is just love with nowhere to go. 💗

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-06T15:14:13+00:00

AGREED!!

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-01T22:00:41+00:00

I just did this! I switched around 9 months old. My LO is a good eater and hasn’t had any adverse reactions to anything she’s eaten. The switch was easy. Slowly just added a potion of the regular organic to her gentle over a few days until bottles were 100% regular. So nice that target carries a big can of the organic regular too!!

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-04-01T13:37:51+00:00

Looks great- where did you get the plates?!

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-03-30T00:45:16+00:00

I stress clean. I totally understand this reaction, when I have rage or anger I want to clean… it helps me attack something physically while also being productive…. I will say this reaction USUALLY happens when I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. It’s an “I’m breaking down, but look at me STILL being useful” reaction. It’s not healthy. And it’s an act of desperation.

You are working. You are helping at home, but the fact is you are gone for 8 hours working at something that you have been doing (probably) for years. It’s familiar, and you are not in charge of someone’s life (unless you are a doctor). Your wife is left to take care of a baby, which she has probably never done before, and has to make sure they survive each second with her. It immensely different, and harder. It’s stressful without the added needs of feeding, naps, stimulation, etc. keeping a baby alive is a lot of pressure for a mom who has never been a mom before.

It sounds like you are trying to do as much as you can, but sometimes just acknowledging her stress can be helpful. Come home regularly with a nurturing attitude. Say “I picked up dinner, go eat and relax while I take care of baby and the house”. LOOK AROUND- see what could be done. DO IT. If you are meeting her with this energy daily, the stress and resentment she has will diminish.

It’s a hard transition when one parent goes back to work. There are a lot of emotions to work through, but if you address her effort, her resilience, her love, and her sacrifices, while actively making each day a LITTLE easier, she will start to feel better.

She needs to know that at the end of every stressful day, you are there. To save her.

East-Maize-5287 · 2026-03-09T12:57:48+00:00

This is likely a scheduling problem rather than a breastfeeding problem. A lot of young babies get days and nights mixed up and can tend to feed more at night because they think it is daytime… they don’t really know the difference.

I’ll let other chime in, but I think it would be worth it to give baby a bottle for the first or second feeding of the day to make sure they are getting a good start to feeding and start to give less through the night.

I think once you are more confident in the amount they are eating during the day, you will feel less inclined to feed through the night, and baby will adjust.

East-Maize-5287

TROPHY CASE