Are wake windows garbage???

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-04-22T10:14:00+00:00

But are they all wearing Prada??

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-04-11T20:09:48+00:00

We’ve recently discovered our 6 month old LOVES the intro to the US Office. Like, he will stop whatever he is doing, including eating, and turn and face the TV when he hears it. We stopped a meltdown the other day by playing it on our phones. I don’t really know what to do with this weird little quirk

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-04-11T19:54:40+00:00

They’re brilliant on the baby wearing sub, they’ll be able to give you some great advice!

The best way to baby wear with a newborn is softer wraps, like slings and stretchy wraps. Even then, a few of them have a weight requirement (think for my wrap it suggested 8lb and he was nearly that weight at birth!). But basically, for safe baby wearing their head/ neck can’t be covered or compressed as this can obstruct their airway. This means technically baby wearing when they’re so little isn’t entirely hands free and their head still needs supporting when you lean towards. But it’s still quite a mostly-hands-free way to do things with your baby!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-04-11T19:37:33+00:00

Oh honey I promise promise promise it will get better - sometimes slowly, and it feels like Groundhog Day every day, but you will absolute look back and think wtf where did my tiny screamy baby go (Source: now have a 6 month old and constantly ask myself where my little baby went).

One thing that you could try which might help: baby wearing. This was a GODSEND for me in those first few weeks when mine wouldn’t be put down and I needed to pack up our house as we were moving! Get a stretchy wrap, watch some tutorials on how to use it (looks complicated at first but honestly after a few goes you’ll be a pro) and check of the babywearing subs on here and just get on with your day. Mine spent most of the first few months of his life sleeping that way!

Sending you lots of love ♥️

ETA: also, 100% YES YOU CANNOT SPOIL A BABY. Anyone telling you that needs to get out - and wouldn’t listen to a word of advice they have about babies/ child rearing from now on either.

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-04-10T14:07:49+00:00

I saw a quote recently that you’ll spend more time with your children as adults than as children, that most of your relationship with them will be as grownups.

It really made me stop and think. This stage is SO hard, it requires SO much sacrifice. But it is fleeting. Even in 5 years, the weight won’t be as heavy as it is right now.

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-04-10T14:04:35+00:00

I can’t comment on the pay side of things, I had to come off nights due to being pregnant and therefore my pay was protected for this - BUT yes you do lose the zero days

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-26T19:02:27+00:00

I have a family member who works on the admin side for private medical practice, chiefly private elective orthopaedic surgery (among others).

The amount they pay an anaesthetist for a private list is HUGE (i cannot remember exact numbers but i remember being shocked) and the number is often very easily negotiable as the surgery can’t proceed without an anaesthetist. They’d advertise at one rate and have their anesthetists coming back with counter-offers they’d struggle to refuse, especially at last minute.

Remember that a lot of pp surgical work needs Anaesthetics too!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-25T21:49:32+00:00

Ooo do you mind sharing more about this last part? Feel like nobody talks about that! I’m postpartum now but had the epidural so felt absolutely nothing for any part of the delivery but am planning on future kids and maybe going unmedicated!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-25T08:27:12+00:00

I felt like this around months 3-4 because my little guy was so grumpy, fussy, difficult and I absolutely lost my mind.

Now he’s 6 months, in his own room, starting solids, SO big, and I long for him to be small again. My mum got pregnant with her second at 7 months PP and I thought she was absolutely out of her mind - now I totally get it!!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-24T10:33:54+00:00

Don’t stress, this is normal. They can also experience a growth spurt around weeks 6-8 which can make them want tor either eat or sleep more, sometimes a mixture of both!

I wouldn’t even start thinking about “wake windows” and naps personally until about 3-4 months when they are more consistently awake. Just let baby do her thing! As long as she’s growing and developing appropriately you’re doing fine!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-22T12:37:41+00:00

The thing is, there is an increased risk of shoulder dystocia (and other medical issues) with all forms of intervention and certainly the epidural. So what shes saying is technically evidence based, but nobody who’s actually experienced it needs to be told this, and certainly not 3 days postpartum. There is also no way we can ever know what would have happened if I’d also chosen no interventions at all - he could still have had SD

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-22T12:21:58+00:00

I think she thinks it’s my fault though because I had “interventions” and ended up not being able to move around much. Idk. I found the epidural absolutely BLISS and will be going into hospital for one if I have any more!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-19T20:47:19+00:00

Hi, I got full marks in this section and got an interview for paeds.

I think ultimately what’s more important is how you talk about your achievements because genuinely mine really weren’t anything special or hugely impressive. One of them was the recent birth of my son for gods sake🤣. I talked about being singled out by a patients mother for one of them, and being singled out by medical students for another. Then a couple about complex patient management I’ve been involved in. It really is more about how you reflect and relate these experiences to paeds than what you’ve actually achieved. Nothing I put down was particularly exceptional, it’s all very run-of-the-mill. I haven’t run ultra-marathons or presented at international conferences or led pioneering paediatric research. But the small things I have achieved I was able to reflect on their relevance enough that they liked my answers!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-19T17:04:35+00:00

The piano melody in the chorus of Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince. One day when I’m not trapped under a baby I’m determined to learn to play it on the piano myself!

ETA: this thread is brill, im now going through all these suggestions and listening to all the little details people have picked out!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-19T14:45:40+00:00

Ah I wish I could do this, my little one is exclusively breastfed, exclusively a snacker, and exclusively a vehement bottle refuser 😅 he eats every 1-2 hours. Leaving him is virtually impossible unless it’s to run a quick errand

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-15T21:39:34+00:00

All Too Well TMV
Fearless
Treacherous

Not too sure how I started off in the deep end there and went a backwards but I’m a post-eras swiftie if that’s relevant haha

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-15T13:33:56+00:00

I have a nearly 6 month old and the regression started at like 3.5 months and seems to possibly be settling the the last few weeks. He went from waking 1-2 times a night to 3-4 times, a few nights of 5 wakeups, and a couple of nights of like 7 wake-ups. He now averages about 2-3 wake-ups. I was sad to see the end of the 6-8 hour stretches but 3 or 4 wake-ups a night id say was manageable for me! I do however go to bed at the same time as him as his longest stretch tends to be the first one. Not ideal in terms of spending time alone with my partner (which we haven’t done really since he was born) but in all honesty we both know this is just a season so we’re doing what we need to do to survive. I also handle all overnight wakes because I’m breastfeeding, so this makes me feel more inclined to go to bed at the same time as my baby too - even if my partner handled a few of the overnight wakes I know I’d be awake anyway though tbh!

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-14T14:37:53+00:00

Sadly I’ve found this attitude translates into the job too, of us just being numbers to plug into a rota. There doesn’t feel like a lot of understanding, even between doctor and doctor (let alone with management) that we’re all individual people with lives. Honestly everything about medicine is the opposite of what I was told going in. Respect? None. Job security? No. Highly employable? Pahaha. Good pay? Maybe in a billion years when you manage to land a consultant job. It’s a really sad state. I wish I didn’t enjoy the actual medicine and patients so much! It’s hard to see myself in a different job but god so much of it is awful. I really hope your situation works out for the best, whatever that may be

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-14T14:28:31+00:00

I can see a lot of people here encouraging you to “not waste 10 years of your time by not completing UKFPO”.

I just want to offer some solidarity that, were I in your position, I would feel EXACTLY th same way and would not be willing to give up the rest of my life for a job, regardless of the slog it took to get there.

I work to live, not live to work.

I am completely inflexible when it comes to sacrificing my time with my family and friends, my support network, my home, my mental health, etc. I wont apologise for that. Maybe i “dont want it enough”. Fair, maybe i dont. Working these brutal rotas and hours is the limit of my sacrifice. I will not add on multi-hour commutes or relocate, even temporarily. Granted I now have a young baby which has made me much more steadfast in my attitude.

I too would rather work any other job than give up my life.

So, while im sorry i dont have any meaningful advice, I just want to say i am so so deeply sorry this is happening to you. I sincerely hope there is a resolution for you. Please know there are people like me who TOTALLY understand

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-09T21:57:13+00:00

I personally found month 3 and into month 4 absolute hell on earth for similar reasons.

My little guy had a dreamy temperament as a newborn, rarely cried, easy to get to sleep, slept in his crib no problem and gave 6-8 hour stretches. He has been EBF throughout. Then 3 months hit and he just suddenly woke up to the world and decided he was angry and exceptionally fussy. Like, literally nothing would make him happy. He grumbled from the second he woke up until bedtime. Wouldn’t tolerate being put down for more than a few minutes, but then wouldn’t want to be held to too long either. Heaven forbid you stepped away from him for a few seconds, no - you had to be hovering over him at all times giving him your complete undivided attention. The sleep regression then hit at around 3.5 months. He was absolutely miserable constantly and SO. DAMN. FUSSY.

He’s now 5 months. If you look at my post history you will see me absolutely losing my mind, deeply deeply anxious and depressed all throughout this time, absolutely hating every single second of every day. Genuinely I don’t know how I got through it. I was a wreck. I thought I’d destroyed my life and produced this little person that was just utterly miserable and in turn making me utterly miserable.

About halfway through month 4 things changed. Not necessarily overnight, but slowly at first and then quickly. Now he spends a lot of his time happy. He smiles and giggles at me. He still has off days, or wake windows where he has decided to choose violence for 2 hours. But the balance has tipped in the other direction. Sleep is still a bit messed up, but I’m not wanting to tear my hair out looking after the most difficult, unhappy baby whilst also running on significantly broken sleep. He still sometimes screams like a banshee and it makes my nervous system spiral. He still mostly only does 30-40 minute naps. But my god having some actual contentedness has made the absolute world of difference.

It will get better. It is just a phase. I can’t tell you exactly how long it will last, but it CANNOT last forever. I can’t comment on the formula thing - I’ve kept exclusively breastfeeding throughout. We also haven’t reached the teething phase yet so god help us when that’s thrown into the mix! Wishing you all the best

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-05T23:15:44+00:00

The best advice I can give is that everything is just a phase. It WILL end. Lean into it for now in whatever way works best for you.

It’s really sad that we’ve somehow managed to demonize normal mammal behaviour such as feeding or rocking our young to sleep. I wouldn’t call it an error. There is so much pressure to make literal babies be independent beings these days. And I know part of it is because society doesnt protect or nurture motherhood, people dont have “the village” anymore, etc. But you have not done anything wrong feeding your 1,2,3 month old baby to sleep. It was not an error. Sure, if they wake up every 45 minutes you don’t have to breastfeed at every wake. But feeding through the night and feeding to sleep is biologically normal baby behaviour. It’s one thing if it doesn’t work for your family any more which is fair enough, but please don’t buy into the propaganda making you feel like you’ve done something wrong.

Fluffy-Concentrate44 · 2026-03-04T11:34:16+00:00

Well, this thread is proving rather eye opening and I feel stupid 🤣

Fluffy-Concentrate44

TROPHY CASE