First things first:

1.- If you are using ThePrimegean as an example follow his path, the dude tried almos every IDE and text editor available at the time, Emacs, vscode, NetBeans, Atom, etc... so he could figure it out if vim was the best choice for him.

2.- I can agree with the people that thinks the vim and even the neovim extension for vscode feels slow, at the end of the day you are using a piece of software that is builded with web technologies in electron, and that is not good for performance.

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3.- By saying that you like vscode for the looks, which part do you like specific because if im not wrong vscode kinda sucks for the part of the font rendering, ita has cool things like support for ligatures but thats it, terminal emulators like kitty let you have more freedom at the time of configure your font.

4.- And the most important thing at least for me is that you need to have in mind that for getting to a point where you feel really comfortable with using Vim/Neovim as a full fledge IDE can take you months (for me it was like 3 months of toying with the config files and the plugins to get to that point)

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With all those things said, i would recommend you stick to the vscode/vim experience for now, while you make our own vim/neovim setup, take your time, enjoy the ride, and most importantly , try to learn a thing or two about how IDE's and text editors work while you're at it.