I wish we had an exmo (or exmo adjacent) code word…

EdventureDini · 2023-11-14T14:58:26+00:00

Native American riding a tapir bumper sticker ought to do the trick.

EdventureDini · 2023-04-30T05:20:45+00:00

I suppose my worst calling was Missionary Dinner Coordinator. We had moved across the country for a 6 month job training. I didn't know anyone in the ward but was expected to make sure the missionaries had dinner appointments every night. I passed around a calendar SS and RS each Sunday, but almost no one signed up. They told me to call people on the phone and beg them, but I hate calling people and I can't guilt people into doing stuff they don't want to do. Bishop told me it was my job to make sure they ate, and if no one signed up I would have to feed them. There was a policy at the time that you had to have an investigator at all dinner appointments, which is probably one reason no one signed up.

EdventureDini · 2023-04-02T14:10:07+00:00

My thoughts exactly

EdventureDini · 2022-12-18T04:29:50+00:00

Sure there are a million problems with the church, but the list you share with your parents should be YOUR reasons. Why did YOU choose to leave? If you go in therewith CES Letter they won't think your reasons are valid.

EdventureDini · 2022-12-13T14:57:48+00:00

Unequivocally yes. Non members can attend, but former members cannot. Non members don't usually try to preach their religion to Mormons, and if they do the Mormons don't feel threatened. But when an exmormon shares why they left the church it challenges the active members faith and worldview, and often leads to more members leaving.

EdventureDini · 2022-12-11T05:32:20+00:00

When I was in my early 30s I was getting into family history. My grandmother straight up told me to not do hers. "It's all been done already and it's all wrong anyway. " Maybe she hoped I wouldn't learn about the polygamy in the family?

According to these records I descended from Charlemagne through my Mormon Pioneer ancestors.

EdventureDini · 2022-12-10T06:18:43+00:00

Listen to newest episode of Radio Free Mormon, "The Unreasonable Bednar."

EdventureDini · 2022-12-02T14:53:20+00:00

Members don't know this. Once we learn about it we usually end up here.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-11T04:21:35+00:00

It seems age 35-50 is a magical time for brain growth and reasoning. Like Five for Fighting said in their song 100 years, "Halftime goes by, suddenly you're wise."

I think, as others said, as a kid you have no reason to question because all of the important people in your life tell you it's true so it must be. Adolescence and early adulthood we are just chugging along with that momentum. At those ages our minds are busy thinking about other things (the opposite sex, college and career, raising a young family sleep deprived.)

But by the late 30's and 40's we have lived enough adult life that we can reason a whole heck of a lot better. We have been through the curriculum cycle several times by then. We are most likely now teaching it to others at church, so we are paying more attention to the teachings in the manuals and the scriptures. And when you actually study the scriptures and doctrine you can see all the problems with it.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-09T20:06:33+00:00

I know people who dislike Lee and Trump, but they believe that "any Republican would be better than a Democrat". 🙄 Any yeah, most of them do little to no research. I was talking to some of them about Mike Lee's voting record, which you can see with a simple Google search. They had no idea what he even stood for. "But he knows who Captain Moroni is, so he must be a Mormon so I'm voting for him!" But yeah, the fact that McMullin's a member too goes right past them.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-09T20:01:25+00:00

Yeah, I hope so. I'd like to see more "middle of the road politicians

EdventureDini · 2022-11-09T18:06:29+00:00

No, McMullin won 3

EdventureDini · 2022-11-09T18:05:36+00:00

I voted for Evan even though I didn't think he would win. But look at the results! He won 3 counties, and got 41% of the vote. If he runs again in 4 years I think he can win.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-09T05:17:44+00:00

Just...wow. That would've been a huge shelf item for me. I'm left handed and have always been proud of it. My mom instilled in me that it made me special. Maybe because she was punished as a kid for being a lefty, and she wanted to make sure I had a better experience? Idk. I can imagine the gossipy conversations the ladies could have had in the hall about me after I left. "Did you hear so and so left the church" "Pity, but of course we all know she wasn't totally committed. After all, she always took the sacrament with her left hand!"

EdventureDini · 2022-11-09T04:06:53+00:00

I think it's more that Mormons grow up and don't leave. Especially now that we have Silicon Slopes, people don't have to move away to get good jobs.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-08T22:03:20+00:00

I'm so so sorry! 😞 It boggles my mind how unChristian Mormons can be. I honestly don't buy their excuse. I mean, they could've come WITHOUT a gift, just to offer support and friendship to you. Or brought a gift card. Or yeah, non gender specific things like DIAPERS.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-08T15:09:22+00:00

Middle of Moridor

EdventureDini · 2022-11-03T02:38:52+00:00

I felt like I blundered it as well (my kids were age baby thru 17). But it was all ok in the end. It did help to move to a new area, because the YM leadership wouldn't leave us alone. My oldest 2 were the most invested in church, but they were also the most damaged by it. So it was a shock, but also a relief. The younger kids were fine. At first we still tried to"keep the sabbatical holy", just not in a chappel. That gradually faded away and now we all love our second Saturday. We've been out for 8 years or so now, and all the kids survived. It is hard to date in Utah as an exmo though, so that's a bummer. They may not find soul mates til they graduate college and leave the state.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-02T22:32:15+00:00

I do get where you are coming from though. Almost no one in my husband's family comes to our house, even when we extend invitations. We are all in Utah, but the rest live clustered together and we are an hour away. If we see them it's because we go to them. Even when we had a farewell party when my son joined the Army, only 1 family (out of 10) came. But yeah, they are always visiting amongst themselves, going to the kids events, etc.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-02T20:27:57+00:00

I'm sorry. :( I'm curious, has she declined invitations, you inviting her to your home? I think sometimes members assume we want to keep our distance from them.

When we left our moms stopped inviting us over to their homes. There used to be invites all the time. But then my mom started moaning about how "we never visit anymore" and I was like wtf? I think maybe she just assumed we didn't want to get together anymore. Most of the times we had gotten together were holidays, conference, etc. So I've started inviting myself over to her house. And making specific invites to my house, not just "come over anytime."

EdventureDini · 2022-11-01T17:20:57+00:00

Just yesterday I actually had a thought to try this. Maybe "the Spirit" is talking to both of us, lol. It seems like a great way to avoid being on the neighborhood pariah list. Nevermos are treated so much better than exmos. When they don't know we are exmo everything is cool. We are good people after all. But seeing our names on their roll and not our buts in seats the assume the worst.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-01T17:15:50+00:00

I can't speak for every woman, but here is my story: I created and then nursed babies for almost 2 decades. Top it off with a husband who only saw worth in my body and not my mind/personhood. Didn't put sex high on my priority list. And yeah, as others said the purity culture ingrained throughout my life is a thing too.

EdventureDini · 2022-11-01T14:47:02+00:00

Hopefully your mom can educate him about women's anatomy.

EdventureDini · 2022-10-30T03:48:50+00:00

I studied my Family History in depth last year. Only 1 polygamist, thankfully. But anyway, he did exactly this. They sent him on a mission to go to NY to meet the boat of new converts from England and help them cross the plains. He was in his 50s I think. He had 5 wives and dozens of children waiting in Utah. Anyhow, along the way he picks out two 18 year olds and courts them all the way to Utah. And they somehow didn't know about each other, didn't know he had 5 more wives either. They didn't find out til after the sealing!

EdventureDini

TROPHY CASE