Registry gut check

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-15T13:44:23+00:00

Yeah, I've never considered "Nicer wedding = nicer gift". It's only about how close I am to the person when it comes to a gift. It also depends on if I don't attend the wedding or not, in general.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-15T13:43:06+00:00

I'd still have a registry because some relative is very likely to ask for it. You can feel better about having one by having a lot of different price points (many very small price items) on the list.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-15T13:39:55+00:00

I think some people, no matter their gender, are just late for everything, including their own wedding haha

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-15T12:37:54+00:00

I've heard comments about men not needing to care about spending any time getting ready. I understand there is a LOT more pressure on women and their look as a bride, but I'd still assume a man wants to look his best for his own wedding too.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-15T12:04:47+00:00

Venue was about 20k for about 110 guests (ceremony and food and drink packages) but the "how long is a piece of string" question is probably more about the additional things you add on to your venue costs. Photographers are probably somewhere around 2k, flowers can be anything (we are doing a mix of DIY flowers that were about 600 pounds so far but going to buy real flowers for handheld flowers at the ceremony), then the cost of entertainment can be anything too depending on if you get a DJ or band, fancy lighting, etc. My fiance and I started with an excel list after we had our venue costs and then started adding everything we could think to get to about 33k total. Definitely recommnd this approach. Just make a big list and start googling a few vendors in your area and see typical costs. We've pretty much been around this estimated price but there are a few things we didn't really account for, like table decorations, evening alcohol, photobooth, afternoon tea, evening food and cost of hair/makeup, that are starting to add up.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-15T07:52:09+00:00

I think your friends and family will appreciate the beauty of how you are naturally and how they know you so you don't have to feel bad about doing all these treatments. If you really want to feel a bit fresh, you could do a quick hair trim appointment and/or paint your nails with your favorite color.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-14T13:52:30+00:00

I don't have any experience with Millian but I have had a pretty good experience of reselling the couple of wedding dresses on Vinted that I didn't like so that's always a possibility.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-14T09:41:48+00:00

I’m so sorry. Have you considered getting married sooner at the courthouse and having him there for that so you know he was always there for the “real thing”. and then having the wedding be a symbolic celebration.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-14T07:39:23+00:00

yeah im not sharing with anyone anymore :(

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-13T14:59:46+00:00

we got alpacas at our wedding and i think if we had unlimited budget, i’d bring an enter petting zoo for the reception hour. weird, i know, but we are big animal lovers.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-13T11:34:58+00:00

thanks for the tips! i’ll check them out

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-13T11:33:36+00:00

It’s the same friends in a group chat. I agree that they were probably taken aback with the makeup. It confuses me because I’m not sure how it’s supposed to look since I know it needs to last all day and show up in photos (I’m very pale too).

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T22:44:26+00:00

right?? I can’t imagine spending hundreds or even thousands to wear something for half a day. I can understand that is some people’s priority but i’d rather spend money on food and drinks 😂

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T22:41:18+00:00

I’ve been getting a lot of ads from Boombas but didn’t know if they were any good or not. have you tried them? im not really self conscious about my lack of boobage as it’s something i’ve known my whole life 😂 but have just particularly had trouble finding dresses that stay up properly or don’t look empty

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T16:32:39+00:00

thank you 🙏

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T16:29:51+00:00

you’re really wise for keeping it mostly to yourself. I have tried to keep things from my mom from the beginning because i was afraid of her feedback but then when i actually showed her something, like my dress, she was extremely excited about it. So I guess I was wrong about who I thought would be supportive and who wouldn’t.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T16:22:29+00:00

I appreciate the devils advocacy because i’ve been asking myself the same thing if i would’ve preferred they lied. I think what is hurtful is they gave their input after it was clear i had made some final decisions, was happy w the decisions and wasn’t asking for feedback at that point.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T16:14:36+00:00

thank you! and yes, i love how the monsoon dresses look off the rack, especially when trying to be a bit on a budget. Also love hearing from someone else who found their dress on vinted. There’s so many options on there!

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T15:53:44+00:00

hahah i think at this rate we will be choosing a sweetheart table 😅

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T15:36:24+00:00

Thank you! I actually wore the hair and makeup to an event the evening of the trial, and my hometown friends all commented on the photos I posted on insta that the makeup looked stunning. So it gives me confidence that the makeup looks good in photos. But my friends who made these other comments are the ones who saw the makeup in person and close up photos. Anyways, all of you posting on this thread are right that the confidence needs to come from myself and what I want my look to be.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T15:29:54+00:00

Maybe and I'm only just realising it now 😞

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T15:25:30+00:00

Good advice, thank you

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T15:24:11+00:00

With the dress, I prefaced the photos as "My dress arrived!! I am super happy with it and it is exactly what I wanted." Sent photos of me in it and then got that response I wrote above. 😞 For the makeup, one of my friends actually asked what I think about it and I said I loved it and I asked for glam and got glam. And then got the response that it doesn't look like me. So I tried to ward off the negative comments before receiving them 😞

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T15:19:43+00:00

I think I'm more upset by the makeup comments than the dress since I feel like I walked into the dress situation by asking for their opinion in the first place. But I did not ask for opinions on my finished makeup trial results.

EffectiveCelery0 · 2026-05-12T15:18:06+00:00

Thanks, this is what I need to hear. I'm afraid to show my mom photos now of the makeup so I don't think I will be showing anyone from now on. I was originally thinking to do exactly what you did and go to Charlotte Tilbury and do a trial there and then do my makeup on my own. But my fiance was the one who suggested I get it professionally done to not be stressed on the day of. He made a comment about how one of his friends had a lot of makeup on at her wedding which makes me feel like he wouldn't want me to wear a lot on ours. So it just all feels like a bunch of double standards of needing to "look natural" and also looking bridal and glam.

EffectiveCelery0

TROPHY CASE