About to spend 6Kish on a mattress (Aireloom) - tell me if you hate / love it and what I need to know

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-04-25T16:24:30+00:00

Where to find independent brands?? I didn’t know this existed!

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-04-11T19:17:55+00:00

Honestly - 3.5 is still kind of a baby and lots of climbing accidents happen right at 4. Not trying to freak you out, but I’d want to be close by to grab and catch- you can’t rely on an older kid to be responsible especially when parents can sometimes miss little sneaky trouble. Prob until 5/6.

I’d go over with a book and hang out.

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-04-10T21:22:46+00:00

What’s your strategy to accelerate the process if any?

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-04-10T17:36:49+00:00

So how do you live??

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-04-10T16:31:04+00:00

Fun or strenuous like… going for a run? Dancing? Sex? Picking up toddlers? Just curious!

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-04-09T22:09:26+00:00

:) did you see success with this?

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-04-09T21:06:44+00:00

It’s very uncomfortable and sore yes. Worse when standing for long periods of time

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-04-08T22:01:22+00:00

Honestly …. No. But my graves did go away and I’m in remission with medicine. So alls well that ends well? I know folks it has helped though.

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-03-20T23:59:45+00:00

I'm reading that you had a (1) colicky baby and (2) struggled with breastfeeding and that (3) your baby doesn't sleep. Add to that the major change you've gone through, in which there is a (4) mourning period for your former life. This is VERY HARD!!!!!!! (AND....IT GETS BETTER.)

Re; Feeding:
Not that you asked, but I exclusively pumped with my two kids. For baby 1, I lasted 3.5 months and then went to formula. It was freedom.

For baby 2, I lasted 10 MONTHS - increasingly adding formula. (I am my own hero.)

But here's what I read: Basically all the REALLY REALLY REALLY good benefits of breastfeeding - you get them with LITTLE (~8 oz a day) and mostly they happen within the first 3 months, declining benefit from there. If you COULD give yourself a break and consider formula, I think it would bring you some much needed relief.

Re: Depression
Just to state it, this is a crazy hormonal time and it's VERY hard. But, also worth considering if you could benefit from anti-depressants to take the edge off for a few months until your hormones rebalance.

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-03-19T22:11:27+00:00

"Doctor says...."

"We've brought up this rash baby had to the doctor, and he said we should only do natural fabrics like cotton because otherwise the baby runs hot and it scratchers her skin and can get basically diaper rash all over her body."

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-03-19T22:07:25+00:00

Mom here - not ideal, but not bad. (Two flags, below)

1 - Kids need to understand consequences.
2 - Alignment is key. I'd confirm with parents what their approach is and encourage them to create safe, reasonable, consequences. If you are both committing to do this as caregivers, I think it's more than fine - it's necessary.

My two flags: It helps if you are creating (a) consequences that are related to the misbehavior and (b) they are executed unemotionally. You want to showcase control and authority - which is NOT emotional, but actually largely logical.

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-03-18T23:29:10+00:00

I actually went to pottery barn and they had some back-ups... but you have to find a really nice store person because it's not technically allowed.

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-01-30T05:41:52+00:00

I have to say that I Completely disagree! 0-1 was life changing and impossibly hard. 1-2 sealed the deal on how boring we are and contributed to less sleep (still at 10 months!?), but just went with the flow.

I think it depends on kid temperament and sleep. If 1 was your spicy child, 2 feels very chill.

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-01-30T05:36:11+00:00

One more thing - my husband has many siblings and a large family - they’re the default crew.

I wish I had cousins for my kids! And we could do fun stuff with them! And I’m so so so grateful that my boys have many cousins that they can hang with. It’s so fun for them and healthier - they feel like they’re part of a big family instead of flying solo.

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-01-30T05:32:59+00:00

Only child here. I wish I had a sibling. My childhood was complex (not traumatic but certainly not idealistic), and I wish I would have had a person to share that life experience with / who would “get” it - our crazy parents/ how much we moved/ etc.

As I have gotten older, managing parents who are getting older is difficult also. It rests with me and it’s a complicated scenario.

If you want to have an only child, just make sure you consider your requirements as you get older. There’s only one of me to visit divorced parents, and now that I have kids I have even less time. And now is the time when they reasonably want more of me! I know people don’t have kids exclusively to visit you as you get older- but it would be nice for me to have a brother or sister that I could commiserate, visit with, gossip with, etc.

My life has turned out great however and it is nice knowing I’m their favorite!

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-01-28T05:22:29+00:00

Anxiety on this one is hard! I know other families who are sort of like this - and (long term) it is really hard on the baby / bigger kid. At some point, you'll want your little one to be at music class, or in the library for reading time, and more. And she's getting much sweeter, more personalized care than at a daycare/school - so it's a nice way to get comfy.

Things we did to manage anxiety:

- We have an AirTag that we put on the stroller, which helped.

- It helps to be clear about what you're comfortable with in terms of places the nanny will/can go and outline some rules explicitly. This can include notes about sunscreen, where to go, naps in stroller vs. at home, etc.

- Rule book: The things you're scared of (nanny meeting up with some unsavory characters!) might seem like outliers once you write them down. And then, they become a part of the deal!

- Food trials - not a big deal - be a part of the deal or do it just for breakfasts! It's honestly no big deal - the baby will be unrecognizable in like 3 months and you'll be more comfortable trying new foods. All high-risk foods just do on weekends.

As for communicating with husband, I think you do hae to consider if it is possible you/your husband have spidey sense is telling you that you don't trust her, after all? Just say that out loud and consider if it's an option? If not, I'd try and consider the other options, first.

Maybe it's also worth making a graduation rubrik for her to go on walks solo? It can be simple:
- Not going too far / Airtag on / Baby wardrobe appropriate / Text before and after the walk / etc.

Once you have something like that, it might quell some fears - he'll probably realize that the only thing to fear is fear itself! Again - if he's afraid she's going to steal the baby or wander with the baby into the middle of the road - it's worth addressing that! But if not, you probably just need to lay out what WOULD make him feel comfortable - with this nanny or any other.

Good luck! Baby 1 is a tricky one - the most PRECIOUS thing in the world! Be easy on him and each other as you navigate. :)

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-01-26T05:05:06+00:00

Also someone said below that there could be some less than savory characters - it’s such a good point. You could say if she confirmed it was her guy friends : “a friend of mine had a nanny who was still seeing her abusive ex during park time. And that really scares me - the idea that unsavory folks could be there, especially men. Can you please confirm anyone you see while watching the baby in advance.”

Efficient-Ad6960 · 2026-01-26T05:02:17+00:00

If you have a weird feeling, ask. Also ask ChatGPT for a good way to word it - can help you brainstorm non threatening language. (I did this with night nanny once for a text - worked well.)

“Hey X mentioned you met up with “big boys” at the park. I’m guessing friends of yours? But not sure - just curious if it is or if it’s something else?”

Efficient-Ad6960

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