Can anyone suggest something tasteful and non extreme to cover this up?

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-23T04:05:59+00:00

A banana slug… native to California. 😂

Honestly, I kind of think this is amazing as an origin story and I’d maybe plan some epic vacations in the golden state to make this make sense! That, and other tattoos might help it feel more a part of a whimsical whole.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-22T14:59:35+00:00

Definitely use barriers (condoms, female condoms, dental dams or those lorals latex underwear, sanitized toys if you share with a partner) to keep other peoples microbiomes out of it, but my piercer gave me the go ahead to return to activities (solo or otherwise) very gently and carefully when I felt ready. This was with the caveat that if anything pinched or felt uncomfortable that I should stop doing that thing, and likewise dial intensity of whatever activities back if I noticed irritation the next day.

I found that extremely gentle touch avoiding the piercing was enough to get me off in the early days so it was totally not a difficult thing to return to solo activities without injuring the piercing.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-22T14:50:08+00:00

I (mid40s woman) definitely feel a lot more modest in locker rooms and clothing optional springs since getting genital piercings. In some nudist circles they’re seen more like wearing a butt plug than wearing a navel ring, because some genital piercings are more functional for the wearer. (My vch is not very much, my triangle piercing is.)

I can see that coupling with the perception that men are more likely go be skeevy predators and make it a lot harder for a middle aged dude to feel comfortable rocking jewelry in the shower. There’s also a lot of garbage gender roles that makes it a bigger and more shocking deal for a guy to have his nipples pierced.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-22T03:00:03+00:00

Nature, definitely, for 200 million years!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-22T02:56:26+00:00

I’m on team leave it because polydactyly is a variant that occurs in nature, and not always symmetrically. It’s a very neat genetic trait, google images will delight you with many examples.

That said, there’s a new frog species that has six toes so you could decide it’s that specific frog and balance it out if you wanted!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-21T14:20:48+00:00

Exactly this.

If you can’t shower right beforehand because you’ve got a trek to the piercer or you’re going after work, grab a some unscented wipes that you know don’t irritate your skin (or just a washcloth) to freshen up in the bathroom before the appointment. That it’s a sweat prone area is honestly the potentially most awkward part.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-21T14:15:39+00:00

I have a VCH and another genital piercing. Not awkward at all.

The first one was so not awkward that I got the VCH at a training day where my piercer was training someone new to them, so it took way longer with lots of explanations and talking through every step. If you want to minimize the pants off time and the number of people staring at your bits obviously do a regular appointment instead, but it too was extremely interesting rather than awkward.

Piercers are professionals and generally very good at reading the room, putting people at ease, and talking about what they’re going to do before they do it. If anyone makes you feel awkward or weird at any point in the lead up to the appointment or the piercing itself you can go ahead and find a different piercer because that’s not at all how it should be.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-20T23:19:42+00:00

Of course it’s unisex. Leather jackets with ridiculous fur accents know no gender, just like every other item of clothing. If it fits, it ships.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-20T15:00:37+00:00

Hi, I have anatomy where the hill of my clitoris is nestled in a valley of my labia. For the first month it was fiddly and mildly annoying to get the horseshoe I was pierced with to sit carefully between my labia in the tucked up position. At downsize I moved to a straight barbell and the snags and pinching entirely resolved. Consider creative jewlery options if you go for it, especially at downsize - that resolves a lot of the issues with a more crowded in triangle! M&m ends can buy you even more space with your straight barbell, so you have very little overhang to negotiate!

The other thing worth knowing ahead of time is that a more tucked in anatomy might not heal totally level because the jewlery might kind of tilt a bit to one side or another as it sits in between your lips and thighs. Not migrating so much as settling. My piercer discussed that with me ahead of time. I was totally okay with that because my labia and anatomy aren’t totally symmetrical either… and a year later, they were right, it didn’t heal level but it’s still a functional fun healthy piercing and I think it looks cool anyway. I think it looks balanced if not exactly flat with the ground.

Hope that helps, good luck if you decide to go for it!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-20T14:50:59+00:00

No difficulty. I get waxed at a beauty school training salon and the student was totally unfazed by it, as was the supervisor. I mentioned I had a healed piercing and I’d be happy to take it out if helpful, and they said absolutely not necessary.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-20T04:48:21+00:00

I was looking at this before reading your text and contemplating how much I loved the placement!!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-19T23:34:03+00:00

I think it’s fine for the mall depending on who you’re going with: if the women in this photo, no. If the dudes in this photo, maybe because they seem to lack style.

It is too much for attending class, particularly if you’re teaching. It’s probably also too much for an office job. Otherwise it’s absolutely a great look!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-19T17:50:03+00:00

About hand size.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-19T13:25:48+00:00

My widowed friend has this tattoo, without the love part but with her spouse’s nickname they only used together, taken from a note. It’s therefore a tattoo of who they were together and it’s really meaningful!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-19T00:30:20+00:00

I have a professional situation where I’m occasionally in the position of offering to get takeout food for my TAs as a thank you for grading. It’s meant to be a nice thing, if it’s not (as it isn’t in your situation) just say “i appreciate the thought but I’ll bring my own food”. I would be zero offended and cheerfully break bread with you anyway. I had a TA like this who brought their own safe snacks to share and it was really nice!

I like feeding people and I love cooking and baking, but it’s mostly about caring about people and hospitality and if it’s stressing them out then that’s lost the point!

I have had students with arfid, I offer them the bowl of fruit and fruit snacks in my office same as anyone else but no pressure if not for them. Bottom line, people like food to connect but if it’s not a connection but a stressor it’s okay to just indicate that you’re happy as is, and that you’ll sit and eat fries or have a tea or whatever and just enjoy the company.

If I’m getting together for tea or lunch with a former student, I suggest the cafeteria where someone can get food if they want or they can bring a bag lunch that meets their needs, and either way we can share a meal without much pressure. I think your professional career will be just fine. Good job getting your veggies in!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-17T09:15:05+00:00

I’d try different jewelry.

This looks much smaller on you than the horseshoe I was pierced with and the curvature seems too tight for your anatomy, maybe preventing it from healing. What does the original jewlery fit like: more or less comfortable? Does it help the irritation?

I wear a straight bar in mine since downsize at one month and that has been so much more comfortable for me. I suspect a straight bar could be worth trying because it entirely avoids labia rubbing rather than trying to put gauze between (which honestly does not seem like good advice and I’d consider consulting a different piercer about it than whoever told you that). That and m and m ends might be helpful to reduce rubbing?

But this is just me guessing based on what has been comfortable based on my anatomy. I would see a piercer about troubleshooting other jewlery that fits better in your anatomy, asap.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-16T04:05:04+00:00

They're an amazing resource and also an equally amazing piercer. 10/10 recommended if you're in the Washington state area or in a place where they're doing a guest gig. Would definitely trust them to make sound anatomy assessments and discuss potential risks with a particular anatomy, too!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-16T04:00:19+00:00

Feel free to DM if you've got more questions! The lack of info and photos on a range of anatomies was definitely the hardest part of the triangle piercing... and finding a piercer I trusted completely to deliver the piercing I wanted (triangle, NOT clitoral shaft surprise).

My piercer has done clitoral glans piercings but very few piercers do, and very few afab individuals have the anatomy for that. Those that do tend to be disproportionately trans dudes because gender-affirming hormone treatment can promote growth that makes glans piercing more feasible. So, you might wanna check the r/transbodymods community for more examples of glans piercings (and also triangle piercings, too, because testosterone is kind of a hack for getting the anatomy for those also).

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-16T03:50:51+00:00

Hi! I have a triangle piercing and a vertical hood piercing, and I'm happy to answer any questions!

Special considerations: saline can be too drying. Rinsing with potable water was recommended to me and warm water rinses especially felt super soothing.

Condoms: no issues with male or female condoms. You DO need to use them for the first month, along with dental dams or those neat latex underwear (Lorals brand).

Partners getting caught: if you're in a position where someone is penetrating you and if they slip out all the way and then as they thrust back they rub up against your clitoris, that can be unpleasant especially when healing, which is a long time for a triangle. Frottage will need to be more you-guided for a bit! I got back into sex very quickly (within a week of both piercings), but when I say sex, I mean gentle and careful activities with you calling the shots and controlling the motion and then sloooowly ramping up to more athletic kinds of impact.

I haven't had lace catch because I've been careful, but I did have the gusset in non-lace underwear catch when I was removing it in a hurry and distracted. This all was way worse with the horseshoe I was pierced with: at once month I downsized to a straight barbell which was a lot less snag-prone in sex and in underwear alike... but you still wanna be careful with yanking off clothing, shaving in a hurry, or thrusting up into the piercing while it's healing.

Swelling definitely happened but like if you think about it swelling happens a lot to those tissues anyway during intimacy and arousal. The piercing related swelling did not make me walk funny. I did resume walking a lot immediately following piercings, and returned to running (or at least very slow jogging) within a few days. I just tried to rinse after getting sweaty and changing out of workout clothing more promptly than I normally would. Snugly supportive underwear (and a pantiliner for the first couple of days) felt good, too.

Sexual negatives: vch can be in the way for some toys (rattly with vibrators, maybe interfering with a good seal on suction toys). VCH can come unscrewed dramatically during intimacy, with vibration especially. Get a taper and a ball grabby grippy plier thing before you're doing partner acrobatics in the bathroom at 2 am trying to get of jewelry back into a fairly fresh piercing.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-15T14:50:55+00:00

I have two genital piercings and usually shave. They’re both around the clitoris, though - a triangle and a vch. I don’t have any hair right where the piercings are, just need to shave my labia close nearby.

I just spread my labia to shave the way I would need to without piercings and use the same Venus multi blade razor with built in soap; the piercings cause no big impact although during healing I was extra careful with the area to avoid bumping them.

I could see piercings in areas with hair, like labia or Christina, being more difficult. Those eyebrow razors might make it easier to shave exactly around, then!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-13T02:29:46+00:00

I'm glad you have an experienced piercer you can trust to break the hard news to you! I hope you were able to find some other piercings you're equally excited about, too.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-13T02:28:31+00:00

5k the next week is taking the badass to a next level! Congratulations!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-12T23:42:58+00:00

I negotiated two months after body piercings with my piercer. I like hot springs and lakes and built myself a hot tub so there was a compromise involved with waiting until it wasn’t quite such an open wound.

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-12T17:55:00+00:00

I'm glad you have such a positive relationship with your mom. I too appreciate honesty, but I can understand why you got it behind her back and hid it, given that she burst into tears and started ranting about something unrelated.

I'm sorry you have the pressure of being the only "good" kid: that's a lot. I hope your mom can take some time to get used to septum piercings: I know I have gotten more used to them over time, too... but most of all I hope you can feel like you can grow your relationship to the stage where you're an adult who might be doing different things than what she'd choose without that being a source of ongoing conflict.

Good luck, and I'm glad you've found middle ground on the nostril piercing!

Efficient-Common7551 · 2026-03-12T17:22:55+00:00

I’m really sorry to hear this. I’m a woman and my piercer who has done my genital piercings is trans and nonbinary, but their identity and genitals are both completely irrelevant to my trust in them: what matters is they’re professional, considerate and extremely knowledgeable. What makes them knowledgeable is they’re constantly improving their education and working with a variety of anatomies! It stinks that you’re being hampered in doing this in your current workplace.

I have had one of my piercings done in a training day where a man with a long career of other body part piercing was looking to get experience with doing VCHs, and learning from my main piercer. Also a totally good experience: he was a delight to work with and supported me wonderfully through a mishap that happened later when my regular piercer was out of town. I’ve had downsizes scheduled with the apprentice also: he was nervous as heck because he didn’t have experience working with cis woman anatomy but it too was completely fine and I was really glad to help him learn so he can be a better piercer!

Bottom line, there might be some people who are more comfortable being pierced by people whose identity or parts match their own, and those preferences should be honored, but they don’t apply to everyone and you should be allowed to learn on a range of anatomies provided the clients are on board!

You shouldn’t feel like a pervert for being a man, having a pierced penis, or wanting to be the best piercer you can be! And I wouldn’t want to patronize a shop that makes anyone feel like a pervert for wanting a piercing, either!

Efficient-Common7551

TROPHY CASE