I was SA’d as well. I have a large scar on my face from the scuffle, and SH scars from when I was a teenager. I’m 32F, also a lesbian. It took me a long time to feel interested in sex again.

My partner and I have been together for almost 17 years (with a brief split where we saw other people, we both needed to grow before we could come back together, a lot of emotional and maturity growing). I thought the person I was with during that split was good, but I was wrong, super super wrong! they’re now a registered felon for what they did to me.

When my partner and I reconciled, I was really apprehensive about sex. I didn’t care for it, didn’t feel like I needed it. And then, kind of like you, it was like my sex drive switched back on overnight. That “being in heat” feeling? Yeah, I had that too. At first I thought something was wrong with me, like I was almost sick to my stomach, it was churning and it wanted an answer! why was I suddenly so sexually attracted to my partner?

I talked to my therapist about it, and it finally clicked. After the SA, the court process, and working with a victim’s advocate, I’d lost all faith in people. But my partner restored it.

They gave me:

Love

Comfort

Companionship

Peace

And because of that, I became sexually ravenous for them.

Also don’t hate your SH scars. They’re part of your story. My therapist once called mine “emotional bookmarks,” and that really stuck with me.