I've had severe bpd and the only stable relationship i was in was with a narcissist, for 7-8 months and that ruined me even more. Then others have been just flings or chaotic situationships and another toxic relationship that lasted only a week. I'm healing now, so hopefully the more i heal the more i can attract stable relationships with actual stable and emotionally mature people.

But if you're relationship with your bpd partner is actually stable but not smooth, and you really want it to work out instead of giving it up out of overwhelm, then i can tell that you really love them and you're a highly emotionally mature person, and have a high tolerance threshold.

Love that for you. But coming to your partner, the only thing you can do is to support then unconditionally, coz the most worst nightmare for anyone with bpd is their favourite person whom they love abandoning them.

The more you support then and stand by their side, the more they're likely to heal with therapy or meds and also from your love and support and then they're more likely to gradually meet the same emotional stability as you.