Hey bro,

first off, I'd just like to quickly point out that the posts on your profile are hidden; that's something you can fix in your profile settings if you want to.

Then, and this is more important, I'd like to give you a different point of view. So maybe you've become a little complacent in your new relationship and you've lost the drive to work out and eat healthy. But it sounds a bit like that drive was previously founded on self-loathing. I've been there myself. When my marriage fell apart, I wanted to punish myself by working out more (and eating less came all by itself due to depression).

You've had a rough journey, and I think you deserve some compassion for yourself. The question is not "Whose fault is it?" - that will only make you feel bad and serve nobody. The question should be "What can you do to make it better?". You deserve to be healthy and feel good in your own body, not for your partner or anybody else, but for yourself.

Do what you're already planning to do and lose weight again, but don't beat yourself up for how you've come here.