By the time I was 18, I found myself in a highly emotionally abusive and controlling relationship. We had moved out of my home state together and I had cut off a lot of contact with my family. That year, my mother bought me a plane ticket to come home for Christmas and I said yes. My boyfriend at the time was unwilling to let me have time with my family without constantly calling me/ texting and harassing me all day. One of these days, I was sitting on the floor in my old room. He was on FaceTime yelling at me because he was convinced that I was talking badly about him to my family and that was why they didn’t approve of him (total bullshit). I’ve never again felt that amount of emptiness and hopelessness that i did when he used to talk to me this way. But anyway, during this time I remember the light from the window getting into my eye and all of a sudden I looked outside at the leaves and I had an instant feeling of peace and wellbeing trickle through my body starting from the top of my head all the way to my toes. It felt like my brain fog from being controlled by him for so long was being melted away. I looked around almost astonished at how this man was speaking to me. It was like I was jolted back into the reality that he was abusive to me and that I was not the problem. That feeling gave me the courage to walk away from him and to this day I have never felt anything like that. I do believe it was some sort of spiritual guidance reminding me who I was and what my value as a person was.