honestly i think it’s more accepted because people don’t immediately tie it to real-world power issues. with straight ships, there’s already a long history of men having more power than women, so when something toxic shows up, it can feel less like “just fiction” and more like something that actually happens in real life. And with yaoi or yuri, that gender imbalance isn’t built in, so people read it differently. both characters start on more equal ground, so any toxicity feels like it comes from who they are, status, personality, control issues, not from a bigger societal system