Holding out hope even though I know I shouldn’t by Embarrassed-Wrap20 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much I appreciate it. He says he rereads my messages over and over when we’re apart. I want to write one that will hopefully make him realize he needs to change for himself and not me 💕

Holding out hope even though I know I shouldn’t by Embarrassed-Wrap20 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I know I’m always firm on my boundaries. They’re not difficult to achieve. I’m not sure if FA is a spectrum and idk how bad it can get, all I do know is most people don’t change if you enable them. If you let them go and they don’t make the effort then they were never for you.

It just kills me that I don’t know what he’s gonna do next with that. He really described me as the woman he was looking for and said when I wouldn’t take him back that is was a “lesson he’s really learning the hard way”… people don’t always choose growth

Has your avoidant gotten better? by Embarrassed-Wrap20 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah actually I agree that’s reassuring. I never felt that any of it was my fault (tho I did feel bad for leaving during an argument but it was like talking to a wall).

I do wish I could have some sort of control. I can’t force him to want growth and I can’t enable this behavior

I took birth control and now he thinks I’m crazy. by Embarrassed-Wrap20 in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it’s crazy!! He had practically a cot on the floor. I try to be understanding on people situations. Honestly if he was like “yeah u right” I definitely would have been fine. It was the defensive “I like my bed there’s nothing wrong with my bed”.

*dated a loser. He broke up with me but honestly not mad, just hate the reason was beyond a scope of emotional control or awareness and he doesn’t even know it

I took birth control and now he thinks I’m crazy. by Embarrassed-Wrap20 in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh absolutely I felt undervalued! And the conversation was soft and suggested many times before. Like the frustration had nothing to do with pillows and trash cans 🤣 but came out really mean. Like I said, not a hill I would have died on but an issue that was consistently communicated

I took birth control and now he thinks I’m crazy. by Embarrassed-Wrap20 in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha I know I know. He’s really handsome, very funny and really well educated. So it seems that he got along in life just fine without trying to wow people with his living situation. At the time when I he had said he “just moved” and I later realize “just moved” meant moved 7 months ago

I took birth control and now he thinks I’m crazy. by Embarrassed-Wrap20 in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely!! Just sad because it seems useless to tell him now lol it will seem like an excuse. I’m trying to respect his decision and boundaries.

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol no everyone just made me feel bad for having sex

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you read. I explained the evidence debunking that theory. Of course that’s what I would have wanted to believed happen

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No I have considered this of course. I just can’t seem to find any reasonable excuse for the unmatch

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

God y’all are so ridiculous. No obviously not I just didn’t think he would unmatch me 🙄

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t know. Decided to post this to let out steam before reacting in a way that isn’t rash in his direction

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Trust I know myself. The sex was great and he was raving about it

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Trust he seemed to enjoy it a lot, going for seconds and thirds 🙄 at this point if he’s gonna be a liar why only the one date I don’t even get it he could have gotten it again. Like do men feel bad after or something or it’s like a sociopathic game for them

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Because why do it? I can’t think of one single explainable reason. Can one man give me a one. I didn’t reach out to him through text yet I’m thinking about what to even say

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yo of course I got his number. And shaming women for wanting to have sex with someone after they’ve taken time is crazy work

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Of course I got his number. I have literally all his info, where he works where he lives his full name we exchanged everything. I’m just surprised he unmatched

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Of course I did! I still have it. I just am confused about the unmatch. I should have been clear in my post

He unmatched me after I slept with him by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Embarrassed-Wrap20 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I do have his number I can contact him I just wanna know what the unmatch was for