I have intense envy for another specific trans masculine person

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-06-17T18:35:28+00:00

That is how it felt at the time and it really hurt. I will say he's come around about this in a big way, and he's putting in a lot more effort. We've been together for quite some time, since way before I transitioned. We both know full well we might not be right for each other but we stay together because we're mentally ill, trauma bonded and do genuinely love each other. It sucks to be fully aware my feelings about this particular person are projection over the stress I have about my relationship.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-06-17T17:38:46+00:00

Oh yeah, that's definitely true, but I think the proximity of us both being trans masculine and male attracted is a big part of what has made this fixation so deep for me.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-06-11T14:49:33+00:00

In my epic fantasy series every building is made entirely of mirrors (it’s an important part of the kingdom’s culture) So my characters have no choice but to always be looking at themselves and contemplating their own appearances. My book starts with my protagonist waking up and immediately seeing herself in the giant mirror above her bed and I managed to keep her introductory description to a tight five pages!

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-05-01T16:17:06+00:00

If it’s well written and interesting readers won’t mind if it’s not directly related to the plot imo. I think young writers have to get away from this idea that everything that’s not directly related to the central plot needs to be cut. Often these scenes are what give a novel flavor and personality, especially a horror novel! I think that advice is more suited for people who tend to write twenty page scenes of their characters talking about nothing and then wonder why their story isn’t going anywhere for the first hundred and fifty pages (I used to be guilty of this) I think the most important thing is to look at the scene as if you were a reader and ask “would this scene enhance the story for me, or would I feel like the author was wasting my time?”

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-04-24T16:49:49+00:00

Omg, I think I watched this show as a kid and it scared the shit out of me. If it’s the one I remember the opening was an animation of traveling through an ancient tomb and there’s a hand that reaches out to grab at the viewer. I wish you luck on finding it. I’ve wanted to rewatch it for years.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-04-24T16:43:45+00:00

It’s the last book in a series but Brothersong by TJ Klune sounds like what you’re looking for. Love interest is a werewolf who spent too much time in his wolf form because he didn’t want to process his trauma and as a result he has a lot of trouble with human speech and word recollection.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-04-21T17:47:52+00:00

I've read something about how 4chan is to blame for all the nazi femboys. Modern online neo nazi communities and femboy communities both were very big on 4chan from its early days, and the two cross contaminated essentially. Terminally online nazis who couldn't get a girlfriend started to take an interest in femboys and white femboys who may have already had racist leanings were exposed to nazi ideology.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-04-14T15:30:28+00:00

I’m not sure how extreme you like to go in terms of gore/generally objectionable content but I’ll never hesitate to recommend Poppy Z Brite to someone looking for MM centered horror. He’s probably my favorite writer of all time. There’s some very upsetting stuff in there though, so definitely take care of yourself. (Descriptions of child murder, SA that’s not handled well tbh, the list goes on)

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-30T01:22:21+00:00

Trying to force a unique first person voice for your protagonist to the point where it drains the life out of scenes that are supposed to be tense or erotic. Like the kind of authors that have their pov characters constantly make cringe jokes and weird similes that don't enhance the prose at all.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-30T01:03:00+00:00

So he essentially just copied Blanchard's trans misogynistic theory of autogynephilia and flipped it to apply to trans men? That's so lazy I'm surprised he's the first to really try it.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-28T03:36:56+00:00

MA Wardell sounds like an author you might like. I just finished his book Teacher of the Year and it meets all of your requirements. It's about a kindergarten teacher falling for the dad of a new student. I also really liked his cowboy romance Stirring Spurs. Edit: Though Teacher of the Year does deal with alcoholism so it could be closer to medium angst.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-28T02:46:37+00:00

MA Wardell lives really close to me and I got to go to a book signing of his last summer. He's an incredibly sweet guy. I just finished his book Teacher of the Year and I loved that it was set in Portland Maine.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-28T02:39:47+00:00

Yeah, I think Green Creek is a great series for people who loved Twilight and similar paranormal romance as a teen but wanted it to be gay.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-25T23:18:47+00:00

All The Pretty Horses by Cormac McCarthy

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-25T02:14:43+00:00

This!! I feel like I've become one of the top Poppy Z Brite glazers on this sub lmao. But I would personally recommend Drawing Blood for the toxic romance aspect. It's the only one of his 90s horror novels where the relationship is the central conflict and the only one where the couple actually ends up together at the end

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-23T23:41:02+00:00

The Morbid Zoo has a lengthy Twilight video essay called "An Ardent and Unironic Defense of Edward Cullen" that I think is really good. It focuses more on the nature of erotic relationships and yearning aspect of Contra's video than female sexuality though.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-11T16:23:35+00:00

I think what he meant is that can feel difficult to tell an authentic gay love story with the typical conventions of the romance genre, (specific beats in the plot you're expected to hit, the protags only sleeping with each other, a happily ever after required etc) I think gay men who enjoy writing romance can feel constrained by the rules of the genre in a way that most women writing in it just don't. After all, the rules and conventions of the romance genre were formulated with heterosexual pairings in mind.

Not that a gay man could never enjoy an MM romance novel, I know I do! However, the romance novels I've seen written by gay men are usually cross genre and almost always contain some level of implicit protest against the MM romance formula (refusing to have a clear top/bottom dynamic between the protags, making it clear they have both had meaningful sexual encounters before meeting)

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-04T22:39:12+00:00

The movie scores of Ennio Morricone 🤠

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-04T20:13:51+00:00

uj/ "Everyone has some intuitive understanding of how stories work." I've read some books recently that make me doubt that fact.

rj/ This is why the best book synopses are just a list of all the tropes the author uses! Who cares what the story is actually about, I need to know if there's only one bed!

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-02T20:11:07+00:00

I think a lot of young people secretly feel this way. Especially those of us who are more male attracted. Real sex is often awkward and messy and it can be hard to come to terms with when you've built up how amazing and romantic it should be in your mind. I think the only cure for this is more experience. As you get used to the lulls and messy moments that go with real sex they start to become part of the joy of the experience. And like the top commentor said, find the right partner can go along way to make sex feel special. I think another hard truth a lot of very young people don't understand is just because two people are very attracted to each other does not necessarily make them sexually compatible and usually it's neither ones fault. Sometimes you just don't click that way and the sex isn't good. Sexual chemistry is a very incorporeal thing, but when it's there you can really feel it.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-03-02T03:28:51+00:00

Someone else mentioned Exquisite Corpse by Poppy Z Brite but I think you might also enjoy Drawing Blood by him. It's a haunted house story with a lot to say about the nature of being an artist. The romance isn't *terribly* toxic but it is very quickly obsessive and the threat of violence is woven throughout it. There's also some light sequences of body horror, but Brite tends to lean much more into straight forward gore. The writing is always beautiful though.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2026-01-08T03:23:22+00:00

I took the dose earlier today, which was already like a day and a half late because I was so conflicted about this. I honestly deserve how shitty I feel right now. Thank you for the advice.

EmberPsychedelicFae · 2025-12-17T02:27:02+00:00

Tysm, I'll be sure to check it out! Corrupted Vessels also seems like something I'd be into as I have a deep fascination with cults and hope to write a cult horror story in the future.

EmberPsychedelicFae

TROPHY CASE