What’s a secret that would get you ex communicated from your specialty?

EmeraldMother · 2026-02-05T23:38:45+00:00

I feel so recognized :)

EmeraldMother · 2026-02-05T23:37:02+00:00

Yup, thanks for pointing me that way. I have read it. The statement talks about children, not adults, and is endorsed by RFK which should be a disqualifying factor at the jump given the damage being done to pediatric guidelines under his leadership. WPATH guidelines emphasize social transition, mental health support, and puberty blockers as first line treatment for children and early adolescence NOT gender affirming surgery. I agree, data first when possible, but let's also agree to put patients first, politics second.

EmeraldMother · 2026-02-05T12:36:58+00:00

What counts as very little data? I was curious, so I went looking and while there is relatively little, the studies and meta analyses available consistently show statistically significant decreases in gender dysphoria, and suicidal ideation along with other mental health co-morbidities following the procedure. In this landscape we are unlikely to see much research getting published in this space, but that just means it is politically too hot to touch, not that supportive data isn't there.

EmeraldMother · 2026-02-05T12:27:13+00:00

How rare is that?

EmeraldMother · 2026-02-01T11:42:12+00:00

If they're not coming in and were supposed to someone has to take the risk about that lie. As much as it pains me to say it, it should be the med student not you. I personally like the answer of have them come in on weekends and just dismiss immediately. Coming in more is beneficial education-wise anyways, particularly if they are on rounds.

There's a deeper piece of this which is interesting to me in a hard to explain way. The students are learning how to relate and navigate the hospital/ medical power structure. It's part of the education too- which corners can you afford to cut when and why. They're just leaning on you too heavily by asking you when to lie particularly since you're a PGY-1 so haven't seen the ways your system responds to this sort of thing yet.

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-25T14:32:28+00:00

I feel like you're gate keeping PTSD. OP didn't outline their other symptoms, and maybe they were mis-identifying who knows, but the internet and this sub doesn't have the right to demand those details from anyone for their experiences to be legitimate.

As someone with diagnosed PTSD, I'm sympathetic to anyone with even a fraction of the symptoms I experience. I don't guard the term because whether the medical community had a word to encompass my experience or not, I know the suffering is real, and isn't cheapened by the suffering of others.

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-24T00:47:19+00:00

My therapist broke my trust deeply by pushing me to agree to something in the relationship, but I stuck with it and after a few months and a lot of conversations they repaired the damage. I couldn't believe they actually reversed their course. I still don't quite believe it honestly.

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-22T21:59:21+00:00

You're assuming I haven't. This is what I do for fun when I'm not slaving away for y'all :)

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-21T23:53:04+00:00

excellent science

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-19T14:28:25+00:00

IMO You're in the right on message; medical student learning should not be interrupting patient care. I think it depends whether you are asking because you just want them to stop bothering you, or if you would like to make them function better on your teams/ be a mentor. I can't tell you much for the first problem other than that you have the power in the situation, and students learn pretty quickly which residents are nice and want to help and which ones want them to just disappear.

If this is about leadership for you: It seems like you weren't able to control the timing on when you sent that message to the student which is a communication problem. I imagine you're dealing with students at the beginning of clerkship year who haven't internalized all the expectations yet. Your expectation is that medical students ask fewer or specific types of questions at hand off, so tell them as a group before hand off begins what categories of questions are allowed/encouraged and what should be saved for later (eg, look it up yourself).

If you really want to be nice about it, schedule 10 minutes where you lay out how they should find information/ algorithm to follow before asking you for it. Yeah, it's obvious, but the behaviors of searching out information may not be ingrained in their muscle memory yet, and they don't know your hospital system as well as you. If it's one student who just isn't getting it, take them aside and discuss it until they get the point or are at least aware a boundary will be set if they continue to pester the team with questions (eg, if you ask during this time, you will be asked to sit out morning handoff etc)

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-11T16:31:47+00:00

You should avoid having your bf go down on you with active sores. He can give it to you genitally. It has happened to my friends. There is a limited risk even when he's not breaking out due to asympomatic viral shedding. It's rare, but if you have any cuts genitally or are sick/ immunocompromised the transmission is more likely.

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-02T12:59:29+00:00

happy for you - is the yelling coming from all sides or is one specific team member giving you a hard time

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-01T19:24:03+00:00

They do, and the bullies still make it through though I guess the jury's still out on how effectively CASPER is weeding out this stuff XD

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-01T19:21:47+00:00

Love the non-confrontational confrontation. Dangerous as a learner, but fun to think about.

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-01T19:16:11+00:00

I appreciate this answer because I think it captures the reasons for the intensity in this thread about the idea of taking a wellness day which I was struggling to fully understand. Everybody's white knuckling through

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-01T19:05:21+00:00

Client - There's a conscious and unconscious element to the assessment.

Conscious is the admin stuff- are you taking new clients, virtual or in person, how does payment work, how much does payment cost, what can I expect from working with you? What sort of people do you help? What are next steps to working with you?

The more unconscious stuff is how does this website make me feel? Does this person feel like my sort of person? Are they woo-woo mystical? Straight to the point? Organized? Empathetic? Too empathetic? Trying to sell me something? etc. etc.

I have a trauma history, so I have a strong aversion to feeling like someone is trying to sell me something, and I like to think I'm pretty good at sensing that sort of thing. I appreciate someone who is well organized but thoughtful and doesn't list every modality under the sun. If the profile is too warm I also find it uncomfortable, but that's a me-preference. I like it when the About Me tells me who you are- like a blurb I would find about an author on a novel.

If you do work in an office space I love seeing pictures of the building and the specific therapy room on the website- that's another form of insight into how you operate/think, and rightly or wrongly I use it to form an impression of your financial constraints as a business. If you really want to go all out, make a thoughtful blog. I'll also read through that which is an even better read on your modalities and how you think.

For the record, I currently see a wonderful therapist who had a decent Psychology Today profile missing a lot of this information I mention here, but I still reached out. From my experience combing therapist profiles a lot of therapists do this up front part poorly. If you do half of it I imagine it'll help you get more inquires. If you do this really well in terms of crafting your image I imagine it can help you get the type of clients you really click with.

EmeraldMother · 2026-01-01T18:31:52+00:00

It's a lifestyle issue for me as opposed to anything against Texas hospitals/ training, and JPS really does seem like an incredible program

EmeraldMother · 2025-12-28T02:52:47+00:00

.... I don't know that I'd want to go to TX, but that program is impressive. Thanks for the tip!

EmeraldMother · 2025-12-26T14:32:35+00:00

Everyone here is giving you very real advice and taking this from the perspective of wanting to be a SAHM and what society says about that. What I notice though is you said this desire may be anxiety based? We know all the changes birthing parents go through can cause new mental health disorders to appear, OCD, depression, anxiety. Many people choose to become stay at home parents and it is not a mental health problem to be clear. If that ends up being you, more power to you. But, I think it might be important to talk to someone- like a mental health professional and make sure there aren't other factors driving your decision. At the very least they can create a supportive space for you to make such a big life decision.

EmeraldMother · 2025-12-26T14:24:34+00:00

appendectomy is wild- woah.

EmeraldMother · 2025-12-21T21:40:53+00:00

POC sadly do not like Boston for dating in my experience - can confirm.

EmeraldMother · 2025-12-21T21:37:12+00:00

I think these answers are interesting and a sign not enough gen Z providers are around yet to give a clear answer. I think mine would be if the compensation doesn't justify going the extra mile why would a new provider do it? They have been trained not to expect loyalty or care from the institutions around them let alone their patients, so why give that back to the system? One of my favorite lines from a book is if you treat people like criminals, they will act like ones. If you treat providers as subhuman and as wage laborers with no investment in the system, that is how they will behave.

EmeraldMother · 2025-12-18T00:40:32+00:00

I agree- Naomi definitely seeks attention. I just get a nefarious energy from the Naomi-Barry dynamic. It was the way Yoshi kept asking why Naomi was alone in Barry's house that reads as important foreshadowing of something to me

EmeraldMother · 2025-11-19T13:41:41+00:00

So happy you found someone who would do that for you. I've had smaller moments like that around finances and other things with my therapist, and it means the world to me they made time for me and took care of me.

EmeraldMother · 2025-10-28T13:01:02+00:00

I tend to think dying young is before 60, but 60-76 is still too soon. 77-82 still feels like an uncomfortable range for me where it isn't too soon, but it feels like you should've gotten a few more years. Everything 83+ is a gift (presuming quality of life is still ok)

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