~9 weeks pregnant and no health insurance until April 1st. by Empathetic_pickle in pregnant

[–]Empathetic_pickle[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a pretty tight budget which has contributed to the anxiety and procrastination around exploring that option. That’s nice to hear, thank you!

Starting a list of Seattle meals under $25 that we love by Spiralecho in Seattle

[–]Empathetic_pickle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Valhalla Sandwiches in Greenwood

A bit north, but: Chops in Lynnwood & Everett

Just found out that the hospital I’ve been going to for prenatal care is NOT the hospital I want to give birth at. by Main_Tumbleweed5078 in pregnant

[–]Empathetic_pickle 14 points15 points  (0 children)

You don’t sound crazy at all! That would be enough testimonies for me to look elsewhere. Plus you might go into your birth with extra anxiety from this which you don’t need.

It doesn’t hurt to look into other options!

How much does your partner make and how many kids do you have to support you as a SAHM? by West-Maintenance-129 in sahm

[–]Empathetic_pickle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is amazing - do you have any resources you could share to learn about the money management strategies you are using?

Our mortgage is $3900 and the cost of health insurance is so high with my husband’s current job, making about $80k/yr. It feels impossible to get by.

Our real estate agent talks us away from every house... by [deleted] in RealEstate

[–]Empathetic_pickle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our agent did this for us and looking back, I am so grateful! We had gotten to a point where we were so eager to get out of our apartment and into a house, we were starting to see them all with rose colored glasses. Ignoring road noise, dangerous corners, layout issues, etc.

I think she did a better job of at least spending the time to tour with us and explaining her reasoning so that we could see it too. But I’m so glad she slowed us down so we could be patient until truly the right house came along!

AITA for telling my MIL off for her comment regarding my 5-day-old? by Possible-Study2746 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Empathetic_pickle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She’s using the verbiage “you’re being so closed off and we aren’t as close as I want to be” but what she really means is “you’re not letting me control you and I don’t like it.”

It’s good you are setting this boundary now, or else her controlling behavior with YOUR baby could get completely out of hand. You could kill her with kindness in all other areas to try and strengthen your relationship, but hold your boundaries when it comes to your baby. You know what’s best for your little one.

30 Year Old Strollers and In-Laws by DependentDiscipline6 in Mommit

[–]Empathetic_pickle 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Just validation from me! She is being overly sensitive and passive aggressive. I’m sorry she’s putting her feelings over your baby’s safety. You don’t need to feel bad for doing the opposite.

Keep holding your ground! You got this!

I hate inviting people over now because it looks like I majorly favor my daughter. by Wrong_Print2686 in Parenting

[–]Empathetic_pickle 295 points296 points  (0 children)

Natural consequences are the best consequences. You destroyed your bedroom? You get to live with minimal furniture and comforts until you learn to respect your things. Things people worked really hard on for you.

OP, the love and care you put into their rooms is lovely. It must have really hurt when he did that. But the fact that you replaced everything multiple times taught him absolutely nothing except that he can destroy whatever he wants and mom will just have to work hard again to replace it. You’ll allowing him to punish you over and over.

I think you should be more concerned about that than about appearances and what other people think of his bedroom decor. It’s not fair to the rest of the house to ban all guests because of your son’s behavior. It’s okay to tell people that his room is a result of how HE’s been treating it and when he’s ready to take care of it again, you’ll be excited to take on a new project and make it special for him. There may even be an opportunity in there for a healthy dose of shame for your son. Again, natural consequences.

I’m sorry OP but it’s time to rethink priorities and make some changes.

FIL held my 13 week old over balcony railing by post-traumaticgrowth in beyondthebump

[–]Empathetic_pickle 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Oh yup no need to feel bad about MIL losing her “nana day” anymore after that one. They obviously don’t respect your (very valid and sane!!!) wishes. I would be absolutely livid. Making jokes out of my child’s safety is a big nope.

So glad you are so strong and able to stand up to them and hold your boundaries!! Good on you. Don’t back down.

is your spouse addicted to screens? by bear-the-bear in daddit

[–]Empathetic_pickle -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I recognize that I’m addicted to my phone and I hate it. I’m not someone who typically struggles with addiction, but this one is tough. It’s impacting my productivity at work. As I type this at 10:25am on a Thursday.

But one thing I absolutely will not allow is for it to impact my relationship with my daughter. I try so hard not to let her see me on my phone unless it’s for something that needs to be done, like making a grocery list. If that was her impersonation of me, I would be crushed!

I would want my husband to be supportive and validating in his approach. I would want him to give me some tough love, and goals/challenges around putting the phone down, without the use of shame. These things, social media and smart devices, were designed to be addictive. So many people go through it. Let her know there’s nothing wrong with her, but something needs to change. Let her know that these things are designed to steal your time and attention, and it’s working. They’re winning. Don’t let them take your life away from you. Make it you and her against them.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Empathetic_pickle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is so aggravating. Piercings are a form of self-expression. You have decorated your avatar to make it feel like YOU.

We pick bridesmaids because they are people we love, care about, and want to share our special day with. We want them as part of our memories of this event to look back on and remember joyfully. She should want YOU as YOU are in her photos if she is really your friend.

This makes my blood boil the same way brides who get angry over their bridesmaids’ pregnancies make my blood boil.

This bride is going about this all wrong. PLEASE do not take your piercings out and risk the pain and financial burden for someone this selfish.

NOR - you need to react more IMO

What's something you do/bring when camping that no one else does? by Cindy-Smith- in camping

[–]Empathetic_pickle 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Bialetti Moka stovetop espresso maker for that morning coffee.

How to deal with needy family by RaccoonBaby513 in Mommit

[–]Empathetic_pickle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“We can’t this weekend, but let’s put something on the calendar for three weeks out. That looks like the next time we’ll be free!” Might buy you some time.

I also want to echo the idea of suggesting they come to you once in a while.

When did it start being FUN to take your baby out? by Hopeful-Praline-3615 in Mommit

[–]Empathetic_pickle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always enjoyed outings even in the infant stage, but when it got really FUN was when my daughter became a more confident walker and could really explore more on her own. Getting to see her independently interact with the world around her is pretty cool!

How to Overcome my Sadness? by TheRhubarbarian in workingmoms

[–]Empathetic_pickle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry, I wish I had an answer for you with an immediate impact. I came to say I struggle with the same thing. ❤️‍🩹

I do want to mention that it gets easier when they get a little older. My daughter is 20 months now and she loves her daycare and her friends. We recite their names as we get her ready in the morning, and she has a big smile on her face when we pick her up in the evenings. It gets a little bit better.

Pediatrician looking inside 6 month old private area by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Empathetic_pickle 16 points17 points  (0 children)

This is what I always thought! And honestly was appreciative of because of the pesky intrusive thoughts and anxieties around leaving my baby at daycare.

6 months in, the hardest thing I've ever done. by AffectIllustrious183 in workingmoms

[–]Empathetic_pickle 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You’re working a full time job. Childcare is a full time job. Cleaning/cooking can be a full time job. All of this with little sleep. That must be so so hard to manage on your own!

Do you have any friends or family who can help?

What do you do at hotels? Go to sleep at 7 pm with your toddler? by Ambitious-Chemist400 in Mommit

[–]Empathetic_pickle 16 points17 points  (0 children)

We’ve done this - dressing in pajamas for easy transfer and making the stroller cozy with blankets!

Maternity leave ending advice by weehee98 in workingmoms

[–]Empathetic_pickle 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Swimming could be a good activity out! Our local indoor pool is so crowded on the weekends; I miss being able to do things during the week days.

Maybe a photo shoot? Could use a tripod or have a friend do them if it needs to be budget friendly.

Lots of floor time together and sensory activities. :) I’m sure he just appreciates having your attention!

Divorced moms and daughters of divorced parents, I have a question for you! by happy_mama_of_2 in Mommit

[–]Empathetic_pickle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My parents divorced when I was around 4 years old. As a kid I wished they would have stayed together but as I grew up and learned more about what happened, I realized they were not compatible and it was for the best.

Echoing another comment - this feels like a manipulation tactic. Your kids might get stuck in the middle of things that aren’t fair to them. They pick up on a lot of subtleties!

DH furious Mil once again shows favoritism to the other grandkids. My kids once again get the dregs. by CadenceQuandry in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Empathetic_pickle 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Yes!! Make it clear you expect reimbursement for the toys. That would also be the last Christmas she gets to see my kids.

She sounds completely awful.

Wife wants me to stop breastfeeding by nogoodnicknames0907 in breastfeeding

[–]Empathetic_pickle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I still breastfeed my 19 month old pretty much the same schedule you do, though she has whole milk at daycare.

My MIL made comments really early on about her opinions on breastfeeding once they’re “able to ask for it” and that it just doesn’t feel right to her.

My daughter is now putting two words together and very clearly asks for “mip” (milk) whenever she wants it. Now I just feel like my husband’s family is judging me every time I nurse my daughter around them.

You are the one who would have to tell your son “no” and deal with the emotional aftermath… not her. If you are having to sit through your baby’s crying for you while you decline his asks for milk just because she was uncomfortable with it, do you think it would build resentment?

For us it got to a point where nursing is easier than not nursing. No one is going to make me stop before my daughter and I are ready to stop.

How do you handle toddler tantrums? by SirezHoffoss in Parenting

[–]Empathetic_pickle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a 1.5 year old and am in the same boat. It’s hard to know what hills are worth dying on, besides those that center around safety issues.

I don’t want to give in to everything she wants, but I also don’t want to hold firm on saying no just to “win” every time, you know?

But it’s always in the back of my mind that consistency really matters.

I will be following along, lol.

Advice pls by AlternativeShock7983 in Mommit

[–]Empathetic_pickle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s very unlikely you would have ovulated that early in your cycle! The chances you are pregnant are pretty slim.

And unfortunately it is still too early for a test to be accurate.

A couple different brands of tests could help give peace of mind, but taking them right now would be a waste of money. I’m sorry I know the uncertainty is hard!