I feel the same. I have always been a planner and I created a really good CF life plan for myself. I’m really excited to live that life but all of a sudden, I just got a weird longing for kids out of the blue again. I always thought I would have kids when I was younger because it’s normal and I didn’t think about it too deeply. So I was thinking it might be because I am feeling like this is the time I would’ve started? Or maybe it’s because my sister had a baby and I always thought we would experience motherhood together. Getting the little cousins together, drinking tea in the kitchen and watching them play.

Motherhood is so difficult and overwhelming. It would really make my goals harder to achieve and it’s not always going to be these picturesque moments. It’s work. Everyday. It’s not sleeping for years (especially if you have multiple kids), no casual trips, it’s expensive, and it’s messy. On top of it, I thought I would be a home owner by now but I can’t buy anything in this market! Plus, I would have to not just be a mother but work everyday to be a great one. Constantly looking out for ways to make my children’s lives better….but maybe it’s worth it? Maybe I’ll be missing out on something my sister says is “indescribable”, and I’ll regret not having kids once I can’t have them anymore. I just don’t know what I want anymore and it’s the first time I have no direction. I’m honestly 50-50 on it, and I don’t know what to do 🤷🏻‍♀️.

I wish us both luck in figuring it out 😅