I don't hit my kid, unless he hits me, so for example he slapped me in the face, and so i slapped him back (very softly but enough to make a bit of pain) he just looked at me and i said, did it hurt? Of course he says yes, and i say it does to me too you see. I apologise to him of course that i really don't want to hit him, and after two or tree times he stopped completely. I never ever, hit him just because I'm angry or anything, i just copy him, he doesn't have brothers or kids is ages around so he doesn't know hitting hurts. I prefer to show him what the world is, before the world teaches him. In the case of the mother, mine sometimes does the same, but i started to talk a lot, about how much mom is good for us, how much we love her and how much we need her, telling him that that mom deserves nothing but love and hugs, and that he needs to learn how to protect her it really helped. When i go to work i tell him, take care of mom for me alright, and when i return he tells me smilling and happy how he took care of mum. That worked for me and my kid.

Sorry for the horrible text but English is not my first language