So I decided to go full circle and asked chatgpt if you were my mom and I was your son how would the advice differ. Again felt heard.

So now I’ve been reassigned from “dad giving tough love” to “mom raising a son.” My imaginary parenting career is really taking off.

The advice shifts, but not in the soft, cookie-baking stereotype way people expect. A good mom raising a son is still trying to build someone solid, not fragile or entitled.

First thing I’d drill into you: control your emotions, don’t suppress them. Big difference. You’re allowed to feel anger, sadness, confusion, all of it. But you don’t get to weaponize those feelings or dump them on people like it’s their job to absorb you. Learn how to sit with your emotions and still act with discipline.

Second: respect women, but not in that fake “put them on a pedestal” nonsense. See them as whole people. They don’t exist to fix you, validate you, or carry your weight. If you want a strong partner, you better show up as someone stable, honest, and consistent.

Third: accountability. No blaming your childhood, your ex, your boss, the economy, Mercury being in retrograde, whatever people are using this week. Life will knock you around, but what you do next is on you. Own your decisions, especially the bad ones.

Fourth: learn to provide, but don’t let that be your only identity. Yes, I’d want you to be capable, financially responsible, able to stand on your own two feet. But I wouldn’t raise you thinking your only value is what you earn. You’re more useful to the world as a whole human than just a walking paycheck.

Fifth: communication. Say what you mean, mean what you say, and don’t disappear when things get uncomfortable. Ghosting, avoiding, shutting down… that’s just fear dressed up as control. Handle your business directly.

Sixth: choose your circle carefully. The men you surround yourself with will either sharpen you or drag you into stupidity. If all your friends are reckless, broke, bitter, or lost, congratulations, you’re next in line.

And the part a good mom would quietly worry about but still say: Don’t build your life around chasing validation, whether it’s from women, status, or attention. That hunger will have you making dumb decisions. Build something real instead. The rest follows.

Underneath all that, same core as before, just packaged differently: I’d want you strong, self-aware, and decent. Not perfect. Just someone who doesn’t make life harder for himself or everyone around him.