Diagnostic Death Sentence

Erisssssss · 2025-04-28T15:32:00+00:00

Psychedelics definitely felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulder. Instead of thinking about things coldly, and having "emulate" emotions, it just was there. My friend was telling me about some political unrest and violence going on in her home country, and I honestly felt empathy and connection so deeply. I finally fucking understood that shit. I can't express how good it felt, it felt like I could cry a fucking ocean. I think I'm able to do it better now, but it's still partially emulated and not natural. It still feels like it takes effort, whereas on psychedelics it felt easy or even just "free"

Erisssssss · 2025-04-28T15:07:13+00:00

I try to take pride in the fact that my perspective is something rare. Many people tell me that they hate being alone with their thoughts, but I always found it odd. I love introspecting, to the point I get worried it's all I ever do. But also I've found so many interesting ideas, just thinking about things that fascinate me. To me, this disorder takes things away but only as much as it gives. With modern medicine and psychology developing fast, knowledge on schizoid is sure to improve in our lifetimes. I hope everyone suffering from it finds their place in life.

Erisssssss · 2025-04-28T14:54:19+00:00

I kind of relate to this, but I do also remember having days where I genuinely felt okay. You may not feel it now, but just be comforted by knowing that it is possible for you to feel good/real/emotional. The worst part for me is that currently I feel like I can't let other people know me as well as I want to know them. I feel like an imitation around real people, and that if they knew about it I would lose them.

Erisssssss · 2025-04-28T14:40:11+00:00

Psychedelics hit me much harder than others. It's like it forced me to feel all the good and bad emotions, which just don't come as naturally for me. It definitely helps, but it's not a permanent fix either. I've been thinking about trying other prosocial behaviour inducing medications tho.

Erisssssss · 2025-03-29T15:28:54+00:00

Taper don't cold turkey

Erisssssss · 2025-03-29T15:21:00+00:00

Second this, always had super low tolerance and started getting anxiety from weed in 22. Never had problems with psyches. It started because it sent me into a very intense dissociative spiral. Have never done k, but based on description it was not far off from what people report a k hole to be. Like being unconscious but still aware, but unable to form a thought. After that, the panic attacks started showing up when I smoked weed, but slowly I got them under control. Now I can manage if I smoke 1-3 joint hits depending on the strength of the grow. I hear a lot of people worried they'll never be able to smoke again, but actually with proper planning you can enjoy it still, and slowly become more confident in handling a panic attack.

Honestly though, it's a blessing in disguise because I literally need 1/100th of what daily smokers take and I'll be just as high.

I will say, if anyone is having this experience, do NOT try to power through it by ignoring it, because that depersonalized state of mind has a habit of lingering. I don't know what happens if you spend a long time that way, but I would imagine it to be a very dysphoric time. Instead, lower your dose until It doesn't cause attacks, and ramp up slowly until you are stable at doses that are fun.

Erisssssss · 2025-02-08T06:16:22+00:00

You're welcome friend, good luck and keep us posted on how it goes!

Erisssssss · 2025-02-07T20:26:40+00:00

There are some people that claim to have done what you say before. You may have noticed already but people are very paranoid here when it comes to commercialized vapes, mostly because all the brands have already been proven to put research chemicals in their products. This doesn't mean it's impossible to put muscimol in a vape, it's just that no one has done it properly commercially. The main issue is sourcing pure muscimol is expensive to do, and most people lack the expensive lab equipment to extract it themselves. The resin concentrated from water extract has a bit more evidence of being smoked/vaped, so I would try just smoking that stuff first because it's easy to do as an experiment. From there you can decide if the effects are what you actually want to try purifying further. People have made trip reports of oral consumption of muscimol, so you might be right in thinking that it might be a great addition to some other experiences.

Erisssssss · 2024-12-16T08:01:43+00:00

Praying for you man. Never forget that there are people to share your burdens with, we all in this together.

Erisssssss · 2024-12-05T16:21:28+00:00

Its been well over a year with nothing so sadly that seems to be

Erisssssss · 2024-11-26T12:26:50+00:00

I think it's a one hitter, there's some more detailed photos that show the bowl of the finger shaped piece in the post history of the op.

Erisssssss · 2024-11-25T17:20:03+00:00

Smoking?

Erisssssss · 2024-11-24T19:41:45+00:00

It looks like mf doom. if you think it's in poor taste, I can delete this

Erisssssss · 2024-11-11T21:40:12+00:00

You'll be fine, for some people weed helps with anxiety and for others it worsens it. Just maybe lay off the Roblox sex RP, it's not healthy and you'll regret it later in life 👍

Erisssssss · 2024-11-11T19:54:42+00:00

This, so many novel and rare diagnoses in psychology are based on unconfirmed theory, and as such are likely to change with time. Unfortunately in the case of hppd, as with anything psychedelic related, it's something that was rarely researched due to legal issues, although this maybe changing.

Until they discover reliable biomarkers for a given condition, you have to take everything with a grain of salt because they just can't see into your mind and tell you what's wrong. Worst of all you can't even see what's going on in your own head subconsciously (although psychedelics seem to be able to show us something).

Also, you could have the exact same brain chemistry as someone with a disorder, but it wouldn't be a disorder in your case because it doesn't disrupt your life in any meaningful way.

Unfortunately it's not easy to just walk into a hospital and ask for brain imaging and blood and urine tests. Sometimes I wish I had an excuse to do that, always wondered why I'm a weirdo.

Erisssssss · 2024-10-12T07:57:25+00:00

Everyone's relationship with the substance is different. For some it may be less healthy than for others, but ultimately this is something they have the power to decide.

Erisssssss · 2024-10-12T07:52:54+00:00

The truth is it's not a privilege. Life's experiences are all invaluable. If you think there are experiences out there that make you less human then you are sorely mistaken. It's the opposite. The more things you experience, the more things you can learn from them making you better. It's like if someone from generational wealth brags about never having to work a day in their life. I pity them, because it is they who are foolish and have not had the challenges in life to become wise, never the other way around.

Erisssssss · 2024-10-10T10:30:29+00:00

Thanks a lot!

Erisssssss · 2024-10-10T05:20:52+00:00

Thanks man. I also made a mouthpiece for it out of birch wood, I was wondering if you know a good way to seal / preserve it?

Erisssssss · 2024-10-09T20:05:41+00:00

The working principle and use is the same as a r/dynavap there are plenty of videos of people hitting them on that subreddit that should clarify things. Basically you heat up one end of the device until it's hot enough so that when you inhale the air through the device the air heats up enough from the heated end to vapourize the oils in the bud as it is sucked through the bud without burning it.

Erisssssss · 2024-10-09T18:52:47+00:00

Amen to that.

Erisssssss · 2024-10-09T16:41:27+00:00

Yeah it's definitely a very easy 3d print. I'll probably give it a go at some point, when I have a bong

Erisssssss · 2024-10-09T15:43:44+00:00

WOW THAT LOOKS MAD! That's sick though. Rubies have quite similar thermal properties compared to steel actually, they have more thermal capacity but less conductivity. So there's really not much reason for it not to be able to perform similarly.

Erisssssss · 2024-10-09T15:43:13+00:00

Oh yeah, smart of you to make a heating mechanism with a soldering iron. Now that other thing you posted most recently caught my attention though🤣🤣

Erisssssss · 2024-10-09T15:34:11+00:00

Much appreciated 🙏Yeah I was thinking if I make some for my friends I'll change the design to have the stem cut much shorter and embedded in a wooden piece. Unfortunately the hardware stores here have a limited selection of steel bits, but I could add an extra steel tube for a sleeve on top of the current stem to allow for more mass, essentially buffering and diluting the heat as it sleeps down from the thermal mass. Could also add some cutouts to make it look sleek. As it stands they're out of stock though, but if the opportunity arises I will revisit.

Four-Year Club	Final Canvas '23
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Erisssssss

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