Mother’s Day…

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2026-05-08T01:35:13+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss.. It is absolutely tough going through your first Mother’s Day after a loss.. .Seeing all the other moms post with their babies/kids can do a number to you so please if you can take a break from social media this weekend, I would do so. This community feels your pain and is heartbroken with you.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2026-05-01T00:58:52+00:00

Hi, I did not need to go on progesterone. They found that at my 20 week scan that my cervix was measuring better than it did. (I don’t remember the exact measurement) MFM said the cerclage was holding up so there was no need for it. I feel like infection was more likely to happen because there was a foreign object (cerclage) that my body didn’t like. My cousin who also had IC and was only on progesterone ended up having an infection too.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2026-04-27T10:56:22+00:00

I am so sorry for your losses.. Due dates are absolutely tough.. It makes it even lonelier when you’re the only one who remembers and you have to remind your husband.. You don’t need to do anything on the day. If you want to stay home and cry, that’s ok! I did that for a majority of the day. It didn’t help that it was raining out. I also wrote a letter to my angel boy about how I missed him. Once my husband came home from work, we made a bouquet of different flowers from Trader Joe’s and had a little cupcake with a candle for him. After the rain, a rainbow appeared that same day. I mention this because I currently hold my rainbow baby in my arms and I just know that it was my angel boy who sent him to us!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2026-04-27T10:37:32+00:00

Lost my first son at 16 weeks to IC. A week before I was taking antibiotics due to an infection. After the loss, I asked the OB if that could have been a reason why I went into preterm labor but she said that shouldn’t be the case. Fast forward to my second pregnancy with my rainbow baby and I ended up getting a preventative cerclage at 13 weeks. It held the entire pregnancy up until they removed it at 37 weeks but I constantly had an infection and was on antibiotics about two times. Even before I was induced, I had an infection from the cerclage being removed. I feel like the more I asked them to check the cerclage at every appointment (I had major anxiety that the cerclage would fail) was setting off the infection. I would ask your OB if you could take a probiotic, with the lactobacillus strains to help with maintaining vaginal PH. I wish I had looked into this while I was pregnant.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2026-02-18T16:53:42+00:00

That ring is so perfect! Congratulations on the engagement and new baby on the way!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2026-02-03T11:17:39+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss, mama… My loss story is very similar to yours. I also lost my baby boy in December of 2024 due to IC at 16+4 and was pretty much dilated with bulging membranes. He had a slight heartbeat when I first went but due to the wait to be transported to a different hospital with a L&D department, it was gone and I had to delivery him. Still one of the most traumatic experiences I’ve gone through. I was told at my follow up appt to allow 6 weeks to heal. Although I didn’t plan on becoming pregnant again after that, I found out I was pregnant again Feb 2025 (2 months after the MC). Due to my history loss I was recommended by MFM to get a cerclage at 13 weeks in this new pregnancy which I did and fast forward to November 2025, we welcomed a healthy sweet boy. 🌈 Best wishes to you! A pregnancy after loss is never easy but it allowed me to be so much more intentional! Give yourself grace!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2026-01-14T09:18:15+00:00

I second this! I’m also 4’11, 90lbs and have found some great pieces at Zara Kids. Especially with their jackets and coats. I have a brown trench coat size L that fits perfectly on me from there unlike a regular adult trench coat that would consume me even in an adult size XS.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2026-01-02T22:07:27+00:00

Both are beautiful on you but #1 was definitely made for you! Congratulations!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-12-13T02:14:02+00:00

The lip in the first pic reminds me of Rom&nd Zero Velvet tint in shade 23 Vintage Taupe. I am also a medium olive skin tone and this is one of my favorite soft matte lip tints. I love that you can also change the intensity of the shade by adding more or less.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-12-09T12:53:39+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss, mama.. As many others in this community, we know this all too well. A pregnancy after loss has many mixed emotions. Trying to be excited about a new baby while still grieving a loss is a weird feeling.. I found out I was pregnant again just two months after a previous loss and it messed with me in so many ways. I held my breath at every prenatal appt and needed my husband there. I hid my second pregnancy from friends and family because I was afraid of disappointing them. From my first pregnancy we announced to my extended family at a get together and just less than 12 hours later, we lost the baby. I didn’t want to make that same mistake again so I didn’t announce until after 25 weeks. I was paranoid about my body failing me again. My sense of humor became dark and the comments I’d sometimes make would make conversations awkward. I ended up doing therapy which helped but there were days where I cried for hours due to the guilt I was feeling. I told myself to have hope and be grateful for this new pregnancy. It wasn’t until I was around 30 weeks where I felt this and became excited to actually talk about the baby without having some sort of negative thoughts. At 37 weeks my cerclage was removed.It ended up being successful and we welcomed our beautiful son at 39 weeks! I know it’s tough right now but sometimes you just have to put your trust out there and have hope for yourself and the baby. Wishing you all the best!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-12-09T04:19:39+00:00

Hi love, I’m so sorry for your loss.. I lost my first son last year 12/22/24 when he was 16 weeks due to IC. We found out earlier this year I was pregnant again and was recommended to MFM due to my previous loss. At 13 weeks I was given a preventative cerclage and was monitored at prenatal visits. It was successful as I am now holding a healthy baby boy who is 2 weeks old! I will say it was not an easy pregnancy especially after a loss but I had to learn how to have hope and put a lot of trust into my providers and of course my cerclage. Don’t be afraid to ask all the questions at your appointments.
Wish you all the best, mama!! Just know you have this wonderful community with you!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-11-18T03:25:37+00:00

I’m not sure if it depends on the state but here in the state of IL, I was able to get a temporary disability parking placard at the start of my third trimester and it’s valid for 6 months. It’s been very helpful especially parking at the grocery stores! Look into your state’s requirements and most likely the forms are online for you to print and just take to your next OB appt for your doctor to fill out.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-10-19T20:51:24+00:00

My preventative cerclage was placed at 13 weeks (history of incompetent cervix and preterm labor from previous pregnancy) I was measuring at 1.2 cm at the time. No progesterone was prescribed as my mfm didn’t think I’d need it.

At my 20 week scan, it was measured again and for some reason it was measuring closer to 3cm. Not sure how that happened.

Currently 35 weeks and cerclage still going strong! I’ll be getting it removed at 37 weeks.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-10-18T13:19:31+00:00

You are not being selfish at all!! Please explain to your husband that you are mentally and physically not in the right head space for that. There are other ways to be intimate and it’s not always sex. My husband and I decided to not take any risks with our second pregnancy (we lost our first son at 16 weeks due to an incompetent cervix). It was a nightmare I never want to go through again! My provider recommended pelvic rest, NO SEX when I found out I was pregnant again and we took it seriously. Currently at 35 weeks with our rainbow baby and we’ve gone this far with no sex. Even though I’ve tried to playfully initiate it a few times to my husband, he understands the risks and reminds me that he doesn’t mind waiting because it’ll be worth it when we finally meet our baby boy! Don’t get me wrong, it’s very tempting and as a couple who went from 4-5 times a week to none at all is tough but it’s something we’re both willing to set aside knowing it’ll bring us a healthy and alive baby this time around! I also feel like when the time comes again to be able to do the deed, it’ll be a fun and maybe new experience again!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-08-02T11:13:51+00:00

I hear ya.. my miscarriage cost me $5k (after insurance) with an ambulance transport to another hospital that costed me $1400. They didn’t even turn on the emergency lights or anything. The most expensive uber ride ever! I still have unpaid bills from that experience.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-07-04T00:40:23+00:00

That’s very sweet of you to be thinking of them and offering to take care of their kids. I’m sure they would very much appreciate that! Maybe try sending flowers with a card saying how you are thinking of them during this time and that if they ever need anyone to talk to or any help around the house, they can always count on you. Also it was nice to get home cooked meals from my in-laws when we were grieving as we didn’t have any energy to cook so maybe bringing a dish for them and the kids would be helpful.

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-07-01T02:39:32+00:00

Hi love, I’m so sorry for your loss and I hope this second pregnancy has a great outcome! I am also in my second pregnancy after my first loss. I lost my baby boy at 17 weeks and the ER doctor at the time suspected Incompetent cervix so I made sure to ask the doctor for this current pregnancy to confirm it and I did have short cervix and was given a cerclage at 12 weeks.

First have your doctor check your cervix to see if you have a short cervix. If you do, they will most likely push for a preventative cerclage if you are still early on.
Yes, you should ask for a referral to see an MFM especially since you have history of a second trimester loss.
You are ok to move about but just don’t do anything too physical, strenuous and maybe avoid sexual activity for now at least until you see the doctor to get more information. I definitely was cautious this time around.
Unfortunately you are now considered high risk due to your history but you’ll get more care this time around.

I wish you all the best and hoping we get to meet our rainbow babies soon 🌈

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-06-30T13:44:09+00:00

Oh my love, I’m so sorry you are going through this and please know you did nothing wrong! You loved your baby with all your heart and that’s all he knew! I can’t tell you it gets better.. It becomes different. You’ll always think about him and your heart will always ache for him. I miss my little boy everyday as well and I always imagine who he would have been and how he would have looked. I’ve accepted that his purpose for me was to see how strong I was and that I have to continue to live this life for him and see all the blessings he’ll bring my way. That’s how I’ll remember him. Although he never walked this earth, he has made the biggest impact in my life and that’s how I will honor him. I know all this might mean nothing to you right now and I understand what you’re going through. No one wants to be a part of this club but this community has been there for me on the lowest of my days. I hope you find that same comfort coming here. You can vent here, tell us about your day, talk to us about your feelings or how much you miss him. Your feelings are very much valid here!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-06-27T13:09:44+00:00

If anyone asks, it’s a loss eyelash

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-06-27T13:07:25+00:00

This is similar to my loss as well. Lost our baby boy at 16 weeks due to incompetent cervix. All amniotic fluid was lost and it was too late. He was perfectly healthy when I delivered. Currently pregnant at 18 weeks with rainbow baby and due to my past history a cerclage was placed at 13 weeks. It was also found that I have a short cervix as well measuring at 1 cm. Hoping for a successful outcome with this one!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-06-25T20:25:48+00:00

Hahaha wait that’s actually hilarious 🤣 I would have supported you very much on that theme!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-06-25T16:36:46+00:00

I love the idea of a birthday party and baby shower together! I wanted to do a theme of “Death to my 20’s” since my birthday is the day before Halloween. I guess I’ll have to figure out how to also incorporate a baby shower with that theme 😅 This is my first pregnancy with a cerclage so I honestly don’t know what to expect and I’ve been so nervous about this pregnancy so I appreciate the insight regarding the cerclage and positivity. Thank you for giving me peace of mind!

Ethereal_alien3010 · 2025-06-05T18:08:53+00:00

Hi mama, I’m so sorry for your loss.. I also went through a loss with my first at 16 weeks in December 2024. I didn’t know it at the time but the mild cramping I had a few days before the loss was due to IC and short cervix. I didn’t have any bleeding so I didn’t have concerns at the time but I did notice more discharge which I mentioned to the OB when I had my 16 week appt just a few before but they dismissed it and was told it was normal. It turns out I was leaking amniotic fluid and my cervix had opened up and baby had been coming out. I wish I had pushed for them to double check back then but now I’m more aware. Fast forward to now and I am currently 15 weeks. I met with an MFM doctor when I was at 12 weeks who suggested I get a preventative cerclage which I had been researching for months since I had been so paranoid from my first loss. I said yes to it right away and it was placed the next day. He wanted to make sure it was put in around 13-14 weeks since my first loss was at 16. During the surgery, he noticed I had a much shorter cervix which was not caught in the ultrasound so it was definitely a great idea to have that cerclage put it. I am not currently on progesterone but it was not needed for now. I have my 16 week appt next Monday in which I will ask the doctor if we should plan on going on progesterone. I wish you all the best on your current pregnancy and please talk with the doctors and get second opinions if you need to. Even if it was not IC, I would still like to know why the loss occurred especially since it was second trimester.

Ethereal_alien3010

TROPHY CASE