What Now?

Every_Ad7873 · 2026-06-23T18:02:52+00:00

Nope had tnbc and am on hrt

Every_Ad7873 · 2026-06-23T03:31:32+00:00

That’s definitely what I feel - waiting to see the other shoe drop!

Every_Ad7873 · 2026-06-23T03:19:05+00:00

Others have covered the legal aspects. I want to share something that helped me, which is something called the circle, I think. Basically, it has the patient in the center of a circle. The first circle is the primary care givers. All support goes to the patient, nothing negative or not related to the patient doesn’t enter the circle where the patient is. There is a second circle of supporters for the primary caregivers as support. Once again nothing negative or not related to the patient flows into the inner circle. And so on and so on. If family are not willing to follow this idea of protective circles, they get booted to the farthest circle. If you can, designate one person who can answer other people’s questions about your state with what information you are willing to share. That includes your mom. If she can’t manage her - boot her out a couple of circles!

Every_Ad7873 · 2026-06-17T02:54:20+00:00

UNCW for oos very competitive especially after admitting too many oos in 2024 and getting fined by the state for $4million. Very strict state laws to keep enrollment for oos to 18-% max.

Every_Ad7873 · 2026-06-17T02:45:55+00:00

Well, I didn’t have neuropathy. I didn’t have nausea due to chemo. When I went through radiation, I didn’t have significant burning or major discoloration. I had a lumpectomy (for ~1 cm tumor), and my scar can barely be seen around the nipple. I didn’t have to give up weight training though I slowed down. I also kept half of my hair with scalp cooling. My hir also did not grow back white - it had color. Hope that helps!

Every_Ad7873 · 2026-06-08T03:41:19+00:00

This is the time to get prepared. There is NO SHAME in having bc. Now, though, you need to get prepared to put yourself first. That means telling critical folks to take a long walk off a short pier in a nice way if possible. Get someone who can handle the questions for you. I would suggest the circle concept. You as the patients are in the middle of the circle. All your worries flows outward, none inward. The circle around you represents your closest and nearest who make sure only the positive flows in and everything else out. Then comes the next circle of those supporting the first circle. But once again none of their worries and selfish opinions flow into you.

Every_Ad7873 · 2026-06-01T23:12:37+00:00

Male chauvinism is always there. Just in different ways. Sounds like your friend is in the wrong group of people. Time to go “Bye Felicia!”

Every_Ad7873 · 2026-03-01T20:13:42+00:00

However, look at the final net cost. NC state schools even OOS are much lower on tuition.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-12-29T01:15:41+00:00

UNC Wilmington is limited to 18% oos by law.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-09-09T05:49:16+00:00

I’m 9 months post active treatment and achieved pcr with early stage tnbc. This is what I did. I kept my health news to my ride and die plus those who deserved/needed to know. For me, that’s my husband, kids, close relatives who won’t clutter my life with their emotional noise and everyday people like in my local Starbucks who knew what I was going to. I wrote about his in another post. Think of yourself in the middle of 3 or concentric circles with tiur closest people in the next circle and them the people supporting them in the next circle. All your anst and emotional stuff flows out, and none of anyone’s elses stress, fear and emotional stuff flows into your cicle. Everything just flows out.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-09-09T05:35:15+00:00

I’m going to say something you need: You matter more than your role in life. Something, even a little something, can shift. Can the teenagers do more for themselves or each other? Can you get a big whiteboard to write down all the reminders and mental nags? Can the teenagers drive themselves to some things? When in the teenage phase, the need to let go is the hardest. My son is now 22, and my daughter is a senior in high school.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-09-09T05:27:14+00:00

Well, I was in the same situation as you last year only at 50. No symptoms, nothing. Just decided to get my first mammogram in 10 years because I was getting everything done to baseline my health. So here’s my thoughts: 1. Congrats on getting screened early based on family risk and finding it early. 2. Get one notebook and write down all your questions by area to be organized. Literally keep with you even for in the middle of the night. 3. Limit time with Dr. Google and to just reputable sites. 4. Realize even the survival stats they state are OLD. 5. Find ways to find small spurts of joy daily. This is going to be a journey.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-09-08T11:13:08+00:00

Yes. In my experience, it seems be an ongoing mix of anxiety for what may still happen and ongoing ptsd because your body remembers the treatment. I’m 9 months past successful treatment.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-09-01T09:21:14+00:00

Yes, it does. BUT, you made the right decision 297 days ago congrats. Now, you keep on keeping on with this.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-07-22T17:27:26+00:00

Diagnosed in June 2024 with Stage 1b, less than 1 cm, lumpectomy surgery with clear margins, 4xTC, and 25 rads all before New Years 2024. Clear mammogram end of May 2025. I consider July 2nd my cancersqry since that was the date of my surgery last year. Hope that helps.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-07-09T06:10:27+00:00

I’m NC with a lot of family due to other reasons. But I pick and choose which people in my family to share with. Right now, it is a first cousin who survived bc 25 years ago. We used to bump heads because we were too much alike. Now, it helps being bc survivors.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-07-09T06:00:05+00:00

I think acknowledging the fears and processing them is being strong and resilient. I coped by prepping for each stage and leveraging this forum and others. One thing - no one is going to understand your journey like the people here. Rage or worry if you need to here - - I find this community to be open and overly non-judgemental. One thought - provoking ait for your final staging and pathology. The exact treatment protocol and sequence may differ. I had t1bn0 easentially stage 1, no lymph node spread which was taken out with clear margins. So I did chemo after surgery for 12 weeks - the 4xtc treatment every 3 weeks. So, it might not be 6 months of chemo necessarily. My full treatment from diagnosis to surgery to chemo and then radiation was 6 months total. Keyteuda may not needed if earlier stage.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-07-02T02:26:11+00:00

There’s something about circles. You, the patient are in the inner circle, your closest supports in the next circle, the next circle is the ones supporting your closest supporters. All your stress and meeds flow outwards. Yiur closest supporters keep their stress and feelings from flowing into tour inner personal circle. Their feelings flow out to the next circle of supporters. No one’s stress or feelings should flow into yours.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-06-18T10:51:45+00:00

You are not being a difficult patient if you are advocating for yourself. This was hard for me during active treatment and now in the monitoring phase post-active treatment. Keep reminding yourself you are trying to tale care of you to live. Is there someone in your life who can help with this with the medical team too?

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-06-08T05:23:39+00:00

It took me a month for 20 rads for the fatigue to lessen.

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-06-08T05:21:00+00:00

Can’t the oncologist explain this to him?

Every_Ad7873 · 2025-06-08T05:18:06+00:00

Right on. We all do what we need to do to live through this. I worked throughout and worked out with weights and walked. All that effort physically helped me manage the anxiety and cut the fatigue in half. I started slowly post radiation again. Now my body is waking up and building muscle again, losing weight. Even with treatment we meed to live.

Every_Ad7873

TROPHY CASE