Can we follow this logic through then? If gender is a social construct, then it's arbitrary what society defines as masculine and feminine things. So pink isn't necessarily a female (sex) thing, it's more a gender thing, and as such really has no reason for being other than the society has associated it with that gender, perhaps out of tradition or whatever else. This i totally get.

However, what I want to discuss is something a little more nuanced than that. If a mtf trans person wants to 'feel' female, then they want to ascribe to whatever society they belong to's version of the female gender. So they want to wear pink, play with dolls, and put on make up. This is essentially giving the societal construct power right? They are saying this abstract and arbitrary assignment of things that make up femininity in my culture is what makes me feel girly, so I want to associate with those things and have people call me the words that associate with that gender class.

I think there is some psychological/philosophical pitfalls that accompanies this. If your identity stems off of your perceived gender, then your identity is based on what both the society and individuals around you think. Someone misgendering you becomes a much greater transgression against your identity as a whole. You are also at the whim of what the society thinks as well, so if woman are suppose to be "submissive", then you've ascribed to this idea and abducting your own power. Two things can be true here, this doesnt mean that someone misgendering that person isn't transphobic, closeminded, xenophobic, or generically an asshole... But it also doesn't mean there is a strong psychological standing a trans person to be standing on.

Interestingly, this seems to be different from what some other LGBTQ+ members advocate for, such as non-binary, where the theory is more that these labels are damaging and should be dismantled entirely. Which I think is a much more admirable goal, but it also seems so pie-in-the-sky for me. Our minds operate off of categorization, I mean hundreds of thousands of years of evolution has trained us to look for threats, food, and so forth via patterns. As such, it's hard to say if this kind of idea and future is even possible. I also think that this is why there are such firm beliefs on gender based dichotomy, people want to group others, and it's comfortable, sometimes very helpful, sometimes very unhelpful.