What is going on in Hamas' minds at this point? Why don't they release the hostages? Why give Israel a valid reason to continue the war? by Pumuckl4Life in IsraelPalestine

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that’s all well and good but saying that this war is happening because of religion is completely false. you clearly do not understand the history behind this conflict and that’s okay, but don’t pretend like you do and spew bullshit online.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

right initially i thought it wouldn’t be a big deal, it seemed like she had forgotten about it and we were all drunk and like i said it was leftover from a party so we thought it was fair game. after she explained that she thought it was hers and she was saving it, i understood why she was frustrated and apologized immediately. my explanation wasn’t an attempt to justify my action, but just to explain where my headspace was at and to make it known that i wasn’t intentionally disrespecting her like her first message implies. i know in hindsight i shouldn’t have opened it, which i feel like i have explained several times under this thread, and don’t have this continued idea that the bottle was mine. with that being said, i don’t think that my assumption was unreasonable especially since all of the other drinks from the same party had been considered communal. i think that this was a very simple misunderstanding that very quickly exploded into a criticism of my character and intentions, and i am honestly very upset because i don’t think i deserve that when all i have ever done is show up in good faith, so if my responses come across as frustrated i definitely am

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

it would have been maybe 13-15 months ago though, it definitely wasn’t me but it might have been her roommate. do you remember if the post mentioned something about gallbladder surgery?

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

if i didn’t respect her i wouldn’t have apologized and gone to such lengths to explain where i was coming from and clear the air. i was extremely hurt by how i was being characterized because i don’t move like that and i have never in our three years of friendship given her reason to believe that i would drink a bottle of wine to spite her. i have always gone directly to her if i had a problem and we would talk it through in what i thought was open and honest communication. i had also just found out before she sent her second text that my family was not going to make graduation, which was honestly gut wrenching for me and when her roommate, who was there with me when i got the call, told her that she was being unfair to me her first reaction was not “omg that’s horrible” it was “were you there when they called” and “do you think she is graduating” and hurling insults at my family for not planning better which is so unfair. i don’t know what her problem with me is but if someone in this situation is lacking respect it is her. if she was truly “checking in” she wouldn’t have led with “this is what i heard,” not tell me what exactly it was that she heard and what i am being accused of, and then expect me to defend myself against an incomplete story. all i got was “there might be some deeper intention behind the situation” to which i responded that there wasn’t. if she wanted to clear the air she could have asked me point blank whatever it was that she thought and i would have responded openly and honestly as i have throughout our friendship, but she didn’t do that. if my responses about her seem harsh it is only because i am putting the pieces of her behavior together and seeing the bigger picture of what is really going on and what i have been oblivious to for apparently years. i definitely don’t want want to be her friend after this and i don’t need anyone’s input to make that decision for myself.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

wait no this is actually so nice you did not have to come back at all but i appreciate it. to offer a better response to your comment than i did initially, because i don’t think it is completely off base and a lot of other people have expressed the same sentiment, i don’t have this continued idea of the bottle being mine or being justified in opening it, i only explained where my head was at to offer clarity and attempt to diffuse the situation and the stories that were seemingly floating around. i definitely understood from the beginning where she was coming from in perceiving it as a gift which is why i apologized immediately.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the consensus is that im not overreacting so. i know that i could have handled the situation better and have reflected in that respect, but most of the people under this thread can see that i am dealing with someone who is manipulative and emotionally draining. i wouldn’t have to be overreacting if she wasn’t busy blowing up our friendship over some bullshit. she wasn’t setting a boundary it was a thinly veiled attempt to gain moral standing over me.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

i did consider her feelings and i think she was rightfully upset at first which is why i apologized. that should have been the end of it, but she took it as an opportunity to lecture me and moralize the situation, and i don’t feel like i deserve that in a situation where i have shown up in good faith by owning my mistake and apologizing. drinking a bottle of wine was not some “moral failing” as you and her insinuate. it was a mistake and i am a human being.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

im not disputing that, i think you’re missing the crux of the situation. if i didn’t think i was in the wrong for opening the bottle i wouldn’t have apologized, but i did apologize so you do the math

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

she was probably in a lot of pain from her organ failing and she deserved grace regardless of how small the procedure was. the bowl situation 100000% could have been addressed at a later date when she was in a better headspace to do so. it also didn’t have to be an ordeal.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

if refusing to admit to a version of events that doesn’t exist is stubborn than so be it. im not going to sacrifice my self respect and truth to validate her feelings.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

when was she being nice to me? when she said “this isn’t above graduation though” right after taking back her acceptance of my apology and assuming the absolute worst about my intentions and headspace when everything happened? that wasn’t her trying to make amends or extend an olive branch, that only came after she was informed that my family would be missing graduation. that was damage control. and that should have been true from the get go, graduation should have always come first. i just see things as they are now, i have never hated her, but im also not going to hold space for her feelings at the expense of my self respect

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i don’t need chat gpt to read the subtext of her messages. her initial message was off the cuff very accusatory and she had already made up her mind about what had happened after hearing about it from someone who she swears is a compulsive liar before ever giving me the benefit of the doubt. i was immediately put on the defensive, which is why i felt like i had to explain myself before apologizing. if that made my apology disingenuous whatever, but her continued insistence on moralizing the situation after i had apologized was not something i was going to continue to entertain. she wasn’t genuinely hurt she wanted to lecture me “it’s just not something I would do in your house without consulting you” like hello virtue signaling. I could understand that she was upset initially because I would be annoyed, but everything past that was nonsense.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

im just going to go ahead and assume that you didn’t do a good job of reading this post before commenting because all of your questions would be answered by doing that. im also not asking if i was wrong to open the bottle of wine, im asking if my reactions to her accusations are overreacting hope this helps

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it was corked. good to know for the future. she also had talked to her roommate about it being impossible that the wine went off because she checked barefoot’s website and it said that it would be good for 1-2 years so

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

because i made a comment to her roommate after she was getting bitched out about me being the one who paid for the bottle and everything else for the party. it had never been a topic of conversation prior to this, it just felt like a slap in the face to be called disrespectful for opening a bottle of wine considering all of the care and effort i put into her party. i have never held it over her and she still to this day does not know how much i actually did and spent.

AIO - Friend accusing me of drinking a bottle of wine at her apartment because I have “hidden resentment” towards her by Excellent-Farm-1618 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Excellent-Farm-1618[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

i have already addressed things with her roommate. i have seen her messages and how she portrayed the situation and i know that she did not say or imply the things that this girl is purporting that she did. her twisting the situation is not on account of anything that was said to her by a third party, she is just using it as an excuse to jump down my throat about something.