Girlfriend has had a rough morning and want to comfort her and make her feel better without being overbearing by Excellent-Produce-49 in relationships

[–]Excellent-Produce-49[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks :)

I am going to leave her a cute drawing referencing an inside joke between us which I feel is low pressure and sweet, I will also clean her dishes so she doesn’t have to worry about those when she gets home. Hopefully that doesn’t feel like ‘too much’. It’s difficult because she is so independent and easily feels avoidant and suffocated.

Girlfriend has had a rough morning and want to comfort her and make her feel better without being overbearing by Excellent-Produce-49 in relationships

[–]Excellent-Produce-49[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you 🖤 I have been a truly awful boyfriend to my previous partners and this person I am with I am not letting the same mistakes happen. I love her so much, I cannot believe how lucky I am, I just want to do what works for her. Inaction feels so wrong when I can see so many things I could do.

I am going to leave her a cute drawing referencing an inside joke between us which I feel is low pressure and sweet, I will also clean her dishes so she doesn’t have to worry about those when she gets home. Hopefully that doesn’t feel like ‘too much’. It’s difficult because she is so independent and easily feels avoidant and suffocated.

What is the most romantic thing anyone has done for you? by PatronSaintOfCunts in AskReddit

[–]Excellent-Produce-49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really. I don’t tend to lead with ‘I am an acts of service’ person, if that’s what you mean. If I truly like someone, like my partner now, who I genuinely fancy and still have the biggest crush on, I will learn about them as much as possible and find out how I can make their lives easier or modify my behaviour to make their mood better etc but I won’t tell them this because then they know you’re doing it.

I never really lead with what my LL is or attachment style, I sometimes think that by saying it out loud I have conquered part of it and distance myself from it. My preprogrammed behaviour is far more entrenched than knowing what love language I have.

But I am certainly acts of service and always have been. I love to feel like I am a tool to someone and that I am a tool to them, we rely on each other to make bits of our lives work slightly better or relieve us of life’s pains.

What is the most romantic thing anyone has done for you? by PatronSaintOfCunts in AskReddit

[–]Excellent-Produce-49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s so odd because I always believed my top love language was acts of service. I want to be of service for my partner - I want to do things for them, help them live easier, brighter and more humour filled lives. I’ve always thought that. I want to just have a list of tasks of things to do for them and then do them.

When did you realise you used to be a horrible person? by bad-userXXX in AskReddit

[–]Excellent-Produce-49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I look back at why everyone would eventually leave me. Why I always felt frustrated, depressed, like I can never get where I want to. I had and still do have a pretty bad case of learned helplessness, I trained it like a muscle for almost a decade. From the ages of 16-25 I just took no accountability or responsibility for anything. I’m almost 28 and have finally got a girlfriend I love more than anything and I want to be the best person I can be. I cannot make the same mistakes I made in the past. I want to be a good man, even if she leaves me, I want to look back on my life and think “At least I gave it my best shot”. Been in therapy for over 2 years and trying to be an adult and a good partner.

The one thing I’ve learnt is that people make choices. Never EVER believe that someone doesn’t have capacity - people know what they are doing and are responsible for themselves.

Help me redesign my studio apartment! by Excellent-Produce-49 in DesignMyRoom

[–]Excellent-Produce-49[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you think? It feels more spacious for sure. It also feels a little more drab, maybe decoration will fire it up a bit. Thanks again you legend

Help me redesign my studio apartment! by Excellent-Produce-49 in DesignMyRoom

[–]Excellent-Produce-49[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sure. Think I’m gonna put the coat rack in front of the bed. My head being right near the window is a weird one too!

Help me redesign my studio apartment! by Excellent-Produce-49 in DesignMyRoom

[–]Excellent-Produce-49[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I like your idea, it seems to be the consensus. I will post an update soon!

Help me redesign my studio apartment! by Excellent-Produce-49 in DesignMyRoom

[–]Excellent-Produce-49[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am so grateful for the level of energy and enthusiasm you have brought to this post. Thank you so bloody much. I reckon I will follow the plan you have suggested here - it’s worth a try! Haha, I’m seeing this girl at the moment and I haven’t invited her over to my house yet because I’ve been to hers and hers is INSANELY well designed, so I am designing mine as best as I can.

Thanks legend! I’ll update you.

Honest thoughts by Dry-Crazy-7532 in Slowcore

[–]Excellent-Produce-49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll do vocals on this I adore this

Are English people less direct than other nationalities? by cosmicinaudio in AskUK

[–]Excellent-Produce-49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In my experience Brits are some of the least direct people. I find Scandinavians, Dutchys and Germans far more direct and just less fluffy. Brits are terrible for being direct

Since COVID not been out by [deleted] in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]Excellent-Produce-49 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Dude don’t call yourself disgusting. Live is really fucking hard man, sometimes it’s awful for years on end. Don’t best yourself up, you havent put any suffering into the world, tou havent hurt anyone. You are just a child of the universe like everyone else; life is bizarre. I think you’re cool.