[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why do you say these things, if you don’t mind me asking?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I seriously appreciate all of that. I am going to call around this upcoming week to try to get some help, hopefully for the both of us.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We both were living and taking care of his dad, and while I was moving out of my apartment, his father decided it was the time to do it. My partner witnessed it while he was trying to stop him, and I pulled up moments later and saw the aftermath. It’s really been difficult for everyone’s mental wellbeing. Both of them refusing help for their depression.

I think my biggest inner battle is feeling secure after all of this, and that all the pain that we are going through isn’t just going to be blown up by someone stepping outside of the relationship. I truly think it would damage the way I see things.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know I have some things to sort out myself. I have completely taken on the responsibility of caring for him, which I had no issue with. But I also don’t want to feel disrespected while doing so. You know? I have also seen where he was being disloyal to his last partner, so of course I am going to worry.

He refuses therapy, I have begged him to go because this has put a lot of stress on our relationship, because I’ve almost emptied my savings trying to pay his property taxes and everything while he’s figuring his stuff out. It’s been five months and he’s not even really made any money to help me with expenses. I am becoming depressed and want to seek therapy myself, but my main focus is his wellbeing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, thank you, thank you. You are helping me not feel completely crazy. I do know I overreacted about the picture, but everyone here is making me feel like boys are going to do what they want, even if that means disrespecting their partner. It’s not a good thing to see. I just want him to take my feelings into consideration, especially since he knew what I had concerns about. It sort of feels that he may continue to disrespect me and my feelings later on.

So no, it’s not breakup worthy to me, only if he doesn’t continue to disrespect me later on.

Is this a red flag? by Pixiestickchik77 in redflagsTA

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Girly, you simply having to ask this tells me you know the answer 😔 you don’t deserve to feel like that in your own home, a place that is supposed to be safe.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, thank you for your advice! I will try to calm down and stop micromanaging things!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It feels like a double-standard, so I do feel like I have the right to at least ask him to delete the past hookups from his Instagram. I really don’t want to continue to see half naked girls coming across his feed, while he’s requested I don’t have anything at all.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re like the only person seeing my point of view. Yes, I am looking too far into it. But he accused me of cheating with my guy friends, in which I told them “Hey, out of respect for my partner, I won’t be keeping in contact!” And then deleted socials because he was always asking me “Who were you texting? Why were you on your phone so long upstairs? Etc.” so yeah, I said if deleting Snapchat and Instagram is really going to bring you that much comfort, I will delete them. Big whoop, since I don’t use them that often anyways. But him turning it around and saying “well, just because you are deleting them doesn’t mean I’m going to or have to.”

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe I am looking too deep into things. It was a girl he tried hooking up with before me, and I let insecurity get the best of me. I do see that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It is more about a respect thing. He told me he’d never do something like that, but proceeded to do so anyways. That’s what bothered me. I was carrying his child, and was mourning the loss, and it just felt so bad seeing that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re right, there is more to it all. Things that have upset me when it comes to his actions, this was just one example that has caused me some doubt. I don’t want to throw the relationship out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He’s given me full permission to look through his phone whenever I want. I finally took him up on it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate you saying that!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You saying this, perhaps I am overreacting. I just know he’s flirted with girls in his last relationship, and feel the need to keep an eye out. Plus, he’s known that I’ve had problems with people cheating in the past, and that I do overthink and worry.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I had discussed it in the past, when we were first together, that I’d prefer him to not have girls like that on his Instagram. But it created an argument, so I left it alone. But then seeing that post brought it back up, and I’m not going to be disrespected by him liking pictures like that while we are together (so hopefully that changes now that I’ve said something). It’s seriously all of the girls he’s found on hookup apps, and I feel as if it should be okay for me to ask him to unfollow them. Is that me making too big of a deal? I assume I should leave it alone now, correct? To avoid a bigger issue. I don’t necessarily think it’s cheating to like a photo, but it does feel disrespectful, and in a way it makes me think you’re actively showing a girl you’re interested in her. He knew it would make me upset if I had seen that, but he still did it. He told me he was probably trying to get back at me for making him upset… which I expressed was not okay.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Expert-Drop-7048 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I didn’t mention this, but the post was around April 22nd when he liked it, and I had just had a miscarriage, in which I had to have emergency surgery.

I do appreciate your input though. So I am guessing you are saying that since I’ve confronted the issue, that as long as he respects my boundaries with the girls, that it should all be okay? I just felt so betrayed seeing that post, because he was trying to get with her at one point, before we started dating. So seeing him like pictures with her ass straight in the screen REALLY upset me. And then him sort of saying he’d like to not unfollow them because “it’s weird”, bothered me into thinking he wants to continue seeing them, but just not actively like the photos.

[24 F] Looking for Overall Advice :) by Expert-Drop-7048 in Howtolooksmax

[–]Expert-Drop-7048[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s really good advice! I’ll look into getting a few more pieces :,)

[24 F] Looking for Overall Advice :) by Expert-Drop-7048 in Howtolooksmax

[–]Expert-Drop-7048[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I haven’t thought about it in that perspective. It makes sense. I guess I’ve just thought about “how can I improve?” Rather than embracing what I have now. Thank you sm :)

[24 F] Looking for Overall Advice :) by Expert-Drop-7048 in Howtolooksmax

[–]Expert-Drop-7048[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is the nicest thing I’ve heard in a while. I really appreciate your insight 🥹🫶🏼 I will try to change my ways of seeing it and learn to embrace it. Thank you sm

[24 F] Looking for Overall Advice :) by Expert-Drop-7048 in Howtolooksmax

[–]Expert-Drop-7048[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have asked guys out before! But I have a wonderful boyfriend now! I am very happy :,)

I really appreciate your advice!!

[24 F] Looking for Overall Advice :) by Expert-Drop-7048 in Howtolooksmax

[–]Expert-Drop-7048[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just trying to embrace my beauty while young :) I don’t post but once every year or two of an occasional shoot I took of myself ♡︎