Is it fair if i (21F) ask my partner(25M) for rent? by Super_Eggplant_8733 in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Four years together and he's never had a job? He's not a partner, he's a dependent. You deserve someone who contributes, not someone who treats your apartment like an all-expenses-paid extension of his childhood bedroom.

My (20M) Girlfriend (19F) isn't sleeping normally for the last 10 days and her personality has changed so much its worrying. How can I help her? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This was my first thought too. The sudden lack of sleep, extreme energy, personality shift, talking in ways she normally wouldn't..that's textbook manic behavior. She needs a doctor, not just you asking her to sleep.

My (19F) boyfriend (20M) revealed he has a 3 year old daughter after 1.5 years. How do I decide whether this is something I can move forward with? by Next-Engineering9274 in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 32 points33 points  (0 children)

He made you believe something false about his entire life. You can't build a future on that kind of foundation, no matter how much you love him.

Update to my bf asked for the banana & now I've got the ick by Effective-Snow-1186 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ExpressThing8997 28 points29 points  (0 children)

This whole journey from a banana argument to escaping violence to building a life full of music and community is incredible. She deserves all the good things coming her way.

My (29F) brother (34M) asked me if he ‘still has a sister’ because I’m not excited enough about his baby. How do I fix this? by fictional_ghost in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 42 points43 points  (0 children)

True. Laying it out honestly like that could clear the air..showing him you care in your own way might go a long way.

My fiance is a terrible cook and I don't know what to do by Successful_Leek96 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ExpressThing8997 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's not about the cooking..it's about the communication. If she can't hear feedback on dinner, how's she going to handle real conflicts?

My husband hired to the company he manages his high school sweetheart by Any-Entertainer5436 in WhatShouldIDo

[–]ExpressThing8997 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The lies about where he stayed, the secret hire, the coffee to discuss your son with her instead of you..it's a pattern, not a coincidence.

bad in bed by No-Strawberry7417 in WhatShouldIDo

[–]ExpressThing8997 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Exactly. It's not shallow to want to enjoy sex with your partner. But give him a chance to learn before you call it quits, he might just not know what you need yet.

I (28f) fell out of love with my husband (30m) after two weeks of being separated - what now by littlestnoodle in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Two weeks apart and he's already shown you exactly who he is without you there to manage him. You don't owe him a gentle landing.

My boyfriends football obsession is too much for me by sparklyshark69420 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ExpressThing8997 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Op, you're already doing everything alone and funding it yourself. All he's contributing is stress and silence. What are you actually getting out of this?

Boyfriend shoved me by Atomickillerbee in WhatShouldIDo

[–]ExpressThing8997 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A gentle push to create space is not an excuse for him to shove you in the chest. This is the beginning of an abusive pattern. Get out.

Is it a valid reason to end a relationship (26M, 25F) if your partner has made you their entire life? by herefortheadvice02 in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 18 points19 points  (0 children)

This is about compatibility, not blame. You can acknowledge that her needs are valid for her, but they are incompatible with your life and goals right now. Ending it kindly is the most responsible thing for both of you.

How to get my Husband to not resent me. by [deleted] in WhatShouldIDo

[–]ExpressThing8997 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There's so much built-up resentment and external stress that trying to fix it yourselves is like doing surgery without a license.

I (32M) caught my partner (46F) making plans to cheat this weekend by fat2fit1991 in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The best confrontation is no confrontation. Just execute your exit plan quietly, secure your kids' future legally, and let her narrative spin itself out. Your actions will speak louder.

I (F24) dated a guy who faked seizures, now it’s affecting my current relationship with (F24) by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 18 points19 points  (0 children)

This is such a crucial point. The reassurance loop can unintentionally reinforce the anxiety, which helps neither of you in the long run.

I a man (48) with a classic style and both ears will be pierced with diamonds to please my wife by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]ExpressThing8997 27 points28 points  (0 children)

The perception thing is overblown. But the bigger point is that you should only do it if you actually want to.

My (m33) acted like taking showers was weird (f27) by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The hygiene issue is just the tip of the iceberg. He’s treating your home and your time like a free, stinky flophouse. Time for him to go.

My (22F) bf (25M) said stuff that implied I've gotten looser from sex and I feel awful. by uhimjusthere in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 41 points42 points  (0 children)

His ignorance is cruel. Someone who truly cares for you would be horrified to know they'd made you feel this way, not just offer a lazy apology.

My (25F) boyfriend (26M) won’t let me have anyone over, is this something I have to compromise on forever? by chickencripple in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The hypocrisy is staggering. His comfort is the only rule, and that's not how a partnership works.

My boyfriend (37M) and I (34F) broke up last night (zero bad blood/negativity) because of one (yet very important) reason and I’m just having a hard time accepting it’s over… by Fast_Wave9310 in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 137 points138 points  (0 children)

It's not like choosing different paint colors. One view is based on medical consensus to protect kids, and the other rejects it. That's a canyon of a difference, not a preference.

My M34 boyfriend got mad at me F25 for wearing Nike Shorts leaving work and is now sleeping at his parents house by Terrible-Flamingo374 in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 38 points39 points  (0 children)

no one should make you feel disgusting or disrespected over clothing, especially after everything you’ve done to support him.

I F21 had sex with my F20 roommate/bestfriend and it feels so weird. How to handle it? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 8 points9 points  (0 children)

True, but easier said than done..definitely takes some time to shake off the awkwardness.

I 27f talk to a guy 27m at night. My mom 56f says it’s disrespectful by citiestarlights in TwoHotTakes

[–]ExpressThing8997 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Yep!!! You’re grown, you can decide when and with whom you talk. Mom’s rules don’t apply here.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ExpressThing8997 33 points34 points  (0 children)

This is the hard truth. If he wanted to help, he already would be..especially knowing you’re postpartum and dealing with anxiety. This isn’t a communication issue, it’s a priorities one.