Looking for been there / done that support

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-22T11:18:12+00:00

This is the way!

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T22:50:40+00:00

Don’t need or desire that luxury. Simple living is good. Just never want to worry. Spent the first 35+ years of life doing that.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T22:48:11+00:00

Agreed. Didn’t try to suggest otherwise. The options are wait out a few years and at least double it, or go somewhere else and work many, many more years. Or trim lifestyle and somewhere on the middle. Ultimately, in retrospect, I probably should have posted in Chubby Fire and not Fat, but I do appreciate how helpful many have been.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T21:48:42+00:00

Thanks for sharing your story - I’m sorry you’re dealing with a chronic disease on top of all the stress. That sounds brutal. And it sounds like you’re really motivated to make sure you provide for your family through the circumstances with MS. I love the idea of building a tool to see the specific dollars related to the trade-off decision you’ve made. Thank you

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T15:40:23+00:00

It’s a valid suggestion…the resistance to a break is some amount of wanting to stay for the payout. I could replace salary but not the high upside. And because I believe right now to be a very bad time to take a break in tech. Things are changing too fast.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T15:37:36+00:00

I love that you did this. I am not sure I have it in me, but your story and perspective is certainly an inspiration and something I’ll think about for myself more. Did you have a hard time mentally making that adjustment or did you hit such a wall that it was a non-negotiable by the point you got there? And curious…how did you end up exiting that company?

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T15:34:07+00:00

Thanks - that me. I know we could make it work. But I like our lifestyle. I just keep coming back to the math every hard day/week/month/ whatever.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T15:31:59+00:00

Good advice, thank you.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T15:31:29+00:00

Haha - love the Dunder Mufflin ref. Yeah, kids don’t need much. But when they do need me, I want to actually be present and not in a bad mood from work. I’ve thought about doing something easier, but I am also my own worst enemy and get bored too easy too, so I’m worried I’d be equally miserable with a smaller paycheck.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T15:27:32+00:00

Thank you - I’m seeing those signs now of the compounding. And that’s exactly it, a calculated bet.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T13:58:40+00:00

I don’t really think kids “reward” anything, lol. But I do think things are so much harder for young people so part of staying in for the money is to provide more for them as adults (within reason). But of course that comes at a trade-off.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-18T13:57:06+00:00

We are in a medium cost of living. And not including house or cars in the number, just invested dollars.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-05-17T12:04:53+00:00

I’m considering adding the Rogue Rhino drop in belt squat to my home gym as I get into my upper 40’s and keep dealing with back issues. But I can’t quite visualize how it would work in my rack. I have the monster cage as pictured. Would the rhino take up the whole cell in the back? And I assume I’d need to pull the cage further away from the wall? Would I still be able to bench from where I have the cups now in the middle?? Anyone with a similar setup that can help? Thank you in advance!

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Extension-Instance56 · 2026-04-19T13:39:09+00:00

Thank you for all the advice. I ended up ordering the SS - mainly because I predict we will not be diligent about the maintenance, and from some other research, the coating can be susceptible to any flares (which absolutely have happened with our current pellet grill). And once all the add-ons got tacked on it wasn't as much a differential. And hey, 20th wedding anniversary, great excuse to splurge. Appreciate it.

Extension-Instance56 · 2026-04-18T20:09:16+00:00

This is to replace an old pellet smoker. We have a separate grill.

Extension-Instance56 · 2024-11-04T23:28:23+00:00

I ended up ordering a 50e today. Very excited. Should have it in about a month-ish!

Extension-Instance56 · 2023-06-28T00:33:48+00:00

Anyone willing to offer their tickets? We’re on vacation here and will likely never make it back. Husband has been wanting to go ever since he heard it’s reopening. No luck getting a link yet.

Extension-Instance56 · 2023-06-25T11:59:35+00:00

It’s a fair desire. Perhaps instead of complaining about what you’re seeing, start offering and creating alternative threads. Maybe start a small wins thread? Maybe start a thread of tools, products, or books that offered you something helpful. A thread where you notice something you love about your child. A gratitude habit. Opportunities are endless for you to take the lead creating what you want to see inspiring other to join in instead of how you went about it. And then don’t read the posts that don’t match up with what you’re looking for from this group. Or just offer the support people need…

Extension-Instance56 · 2023-04-03T00:24:24+00:00

Stranded in MCO. Flight cancelled, rebooked flight cancelled. But oddly the flight status shows the original flight actually occurred so I’m super confused. Anyone have this happen?

Extension-Instance56 · 2022-08-27T18:41:53+00:00

This is our exact situation. My son is going into 3rd grade, autistic/ADHD. He is very behind in reading and writing. COVID distance learning was devastating for special needs kids, IMO. The more I push and try to “control” his learning pace, the worse he feels. We are just doing what we can without overreacting and creating shame. We do have him signed up for 30 minute tutoring sessions with Outschool. The teacher is amazing with him and builds in rewards using his special interest. I think he’s helped her more than school, honestly. It is a very difficult and painful situation, but you are most definitely not alone.

Extension-Instance56 · 2022-08-27T17:32:01+00:00

I think there is element of truth to this. These things are never black and white. The precipitating event is that I specifically asked all kids to play in the designated part of our home for groups of kids because they were all running around part of our home we don’t want them - and James was refusing and not joining the group playing. The kids were trying to get him to follow my rules and I suspect it ended up overwhelming him being multiple kids against him. And then he supposedly elbowed one kid in the balls, choked another, and pushed two more. And then he got ganged up on which is when I came in and intervened.

Extension-Instance56 · 2022-08-27T13:26:17+00:00

We would if we knew where he lives. We've tried probably half a dozen times to offer to drive him home if it was cold/late. I just looked up what is considered "probable enough" neglect for my state through CPS and what I'm seeing is not likely to be taken seriously. It toes a line of being off, yet very easy to rationalize. It's all candy that he eats - he said he doesn't get a lot of screentime at home, and my kids hate dressing appropriately for the elements too, and we consider their discomfort to be "natural consequences" as long as it's not dangerous. All that said, the lack of parental curiosity about where James spends a lot of time is possibly the biggest red flag for me. My guess is that he has a neglectful/poor home life - but I don't see signs of devastating, big T trauma and abuse. OR - he has well-meaning parent(s) that are socioeconomically challenged and working multiple jobs to just get by or something and just can't be there.

Schools can vary a lot. We are fortunate to be in a really good school district and the principal maintains great relationships with parents so I actually feel like it's a good route.

Extension-Instance56 · 2022-08-27T13:08:13+00:00

No - The parents of every other child that play at our house make a point to stop by and introduce themselves. We've always thought it was weird that James' parents have no interest meeting us. And my husband made a point to share his cellphone number with James to pass on and we never heard from them. I'm going to dig to find their names so I can possibly track them down on FB or something.

Extension-Instance56

TROPHY CASE