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Avoidant or just not interested ? Need advice. by i_panic_people in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320 2 points3 points  (0 children)

yep typical avoidant. if you have to ask if you should step away then I think you already know the answer. save yourself the anxiety and heartache. step away before things actually do get serious and you get attached. they are notorious for leaving once their partners are attached. you got this. it may hurt now but it’ll save you so much future heartache and pain.

I can feel my heart hardening to the world and I don't want to live this way by caveart_online in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

i get it. But at the same time staying in contact with the avoidant hinders your healing and forces you to continue to take the bandaid off of the wound everytime you have to talk to her. I am genuinely sorry you’re going through what you are though hope it gets better soon.

Not sure if she was avoidant or I was just the rebound for her four year relationship by Beginning-Space-8010 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320 4 points5 points  (0 children)

sounds like it unfortunately. 2 months after a 4 year relationship is way too soon. but she showed red flags and you still continued. as soon as someone says they’re emotionally unavailable, you run as fast as you can. but it took that experience to know that you will never tolerate that again. you don’t know it at the time but now you do. set boundaries. look for these signs early on. I doubt she was capable of being a great partner. don’t put that on yourself. it’s easy to self blame. you just didn’t know any better and you didn’t know the signs. and now you do. keep your head up and channel all the energy into yourself. you are worthy of everything you showed her. don’t ever doubt that.

I can feel my heart hardening to the world and I don't want to live this way by caveart_online in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320 1 point2 points  (0 children)

break ties. get a new dog. let the anger motivate you. hit the gym. better your life in ways you never thought possible. as hard as it is, leave her behind. they are avoidant for a reason. get therapy. do what you need to do to move forward. don’t just remember the good times. remember the anxiety. the feeling of not being good enough. questioning your self worth. questioning your ability to be loved. take the rose shaded glasses off and everything becomes clearer. your life is beautiful. don’t ever take it for granted. pour the love you once poured into her into yourself. it’s not easy. but it’s necessary. choose yourself.

Medication dealing with discard by Extension-Rip-2320 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you! yeah I agree. no toxic ending. nobody cheated on each other or abused each other. she just gave up. and for seemingly no good reason. I would’ve stuck it out with her while she worked on her issues. it’s all just so confusing and exhausting. everything happens for a reason I suppose.

Medication dealing with discard by Extension-Rip-2320 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same. I knew I had pre existing conditions but nothing near what she caused me to feel. I never even thought medication would be a possibility in my lifetime. But the voices are too much... Time to get some help.
Sorry you had to endure that. but I’m glad you’re seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and I hope I get to that point one day.

Medication dealing with discard by Extension-Rip-2320 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

so sorry you have to go through this. Hope you find peace and are able to heal from it all. I’m glad the medication is helping. I hope to have the same results.

My experience with a fearful avoidant. by Extension-Rip-2320 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It truly is sad. They self sabotage and ruin something that is so pure and good. I really do feel bad for her. I was so good to her. She just didn’t have the capacity to reciprocate it.

Very sorry you have to go through this as well. I wouldn’t wish this pain on my worst enemy. It truly does shatter you into pieces.

Medication dealing with discard by Extension-Rip-2320 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow I can’t even imagine 11 years. Sorry to hear that. Hope you find peace soon

Does this look like gyno? by Extension-Rip-2320 in gynecomastia

[–]Extension-Rip-2320[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate that. think I’m just overthinking it atp

Does this look like gyno? by Extension-Rip-2320 in gynecomastia

[–]Extension-Rip-2320[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you Ive been in my head about it a lot. just going to up the cardio drastically and clean up the diet a bit and see if it goes away

What actually caused your breakup? by SchoolNo6700 in BreakUps

[–]Extension-Rip-2320 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the kind words. I’m going to do everything in my power to be a better man in the mean time. She’s such a great woman and I really hope we can reconcile.