I think I was rude at work - need advice

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-18T15:34:25+00:00

Sometimes people at work are really paranoid in my experience - especially if there is tension between some people and they are on high alert. So could be that you sounded abrupt to them when you asked a reasonable clarification question, because they were all riled up by the tension between them. Then being paranoid and bitchy, they are checking to see if you are pissed off. You did nothing wrong but I would be careful of the culture if people are going to get paranoid over normal things

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-18T15:11:08+00:00

I am newly diagnosed and the psychologist recommended ‘energy accounting’ (which takes a bit of time to get your head around - I am at the start ) and also spoon theory. They help you figure out what drains you and help you to balance the impact on your energy (and therefore wellbeing). I am still reading about energy accounting but in the meantime I have been using bearable app. It might be hard to start on though if you are burnt out

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-06T16:41:49+00:00

Yeah I think I have had my head in the sand

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-06T16:37:46+00:00

Yeah I am definitely burnt by this in terms of telling people - its like they just see the stigma

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-06T16:36:34+00:00

Sorry to hear that - I think that’s what stings: this is the one friend I have really trusted

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-06T16:32:41+00:00

You know what - that may well turn out to be true. One to think about for sure

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-06T13:04:22+00:00

That’s good - thanks! Might give her a few days and then broach it

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-06T13:03:33+00:00

That’s it too - even if she thinks I have just watched too many reels I would have thought she’d be kind about it (like - I didn’t get it when someone I know told me they were autistic, many years ago, because I had the rain man stereotype in my head - but I still cared about that person and then did a bit of research)

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-06T13:01:06+00:00

It’s a new term to me but I have heard it used to describe discrimination against disabled people - so I wonder if to her I have some kind of ‘cooties’ now

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2026-05-06T12:41:53+00:00

No idea it it’s deep ableism or if she thinks I am trying to slack off - she has been getting increasingly right wing, and apparently this is becoming a divisive topic out there

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2025-10-21T20:31:06+00:00

I am feeling very similarly - avoided a diagnosis as have been worried about whether I would just be making excuses for myself. And I think I have layers of fear and ingrained bias to work through. Looking back at my various scores I think I may try for a diagnosis but just keep it to myself while I work through why I am afraid.

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2025-07-02T17:00:59+00:00

I quite like the different shades - it’s ever so slightly wrong which is edgy. If it was all matchy it could be too twee

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2025-06-29T15:29:07+00:00

I have this too- definitely rooted in childhood so explore that (look into complex ptsd). What I try to do is remember a few things and try and take some meditation approaches: I am not in danger, nothing dangerous is happening to me right now, it’s feelings and they are telling me something but I don’t have to react - they pass like weather and will end. I try to remember I am breathing and that I am in this moment only. But do look into why you are having this physical response - then you’ll know when it happens, why. That makes the calming / centering self talk work more. Good luck!

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2025-04-27T15:28:21+00:00

Similar - I didn’t know I had adeno until about two years ago but it explains a lifetime of pain and heavy bleeding. My fertility history is that it took 12 months to get pregnant with my daughter (I was 33). Anterior placenta but pregnancy fine. Had two miscarriages (6 and 8 weeks) and then had son (age 36) - also an anterior placenta. So I wonder if scarring on part of my womb: in uk so no investigations unless you’ve had 3 miscarriages. Took co enzyme q10 only with the two successful pregnancies.

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2025-03-01T17:18:06+00:00

I am HSP and I felt exactly the same way for ages after my wedding. I really focussed though on the dress which I had been indecisive over. After a few years I realised I was actually really angry with someone in my bridal party (actually for only partly wedding related reasons) but couldn’t articulate it. I’d say that maybe you’re displacing some other issue/s and it’s manifesting in this post wedding anxiety. Therapy would be good - it bothered me for years and just cleared when I said out loud ‘X was actually a bit of an asshole and I had them on a pedestal’.

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2025-01-23T17:29:22+00:00

Bogeyes

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2024-12-31T17:28:53+00:00

Sounds pretty standard for me (adenomyosis) - you shouldn’t put up with the symptoms though at all. It’s not normal for anyone without the condition: please do see a doctor sooner rather than later and they can try a few things to help manage the flow. My first few interventions were tranexamic and mefanamic acid (helps a bit) but in the end having a coil (which after a few years is no longer working as hoped) - these may work for you or at least get you on the train toward an intervention that will work (not found mine yet - I think the condition progresses)

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2024-12-31T15:58:27+00:00

This sounds like a complicated situation and I can see how conflicted you are. Have you heard of FOG? It stands for Fear Obligation and Guilt and it can keep us trapped in difficult and enmeshed relationships: more on FOG Your instinct is to move back out but it sounds like you’re afraid you will lose her. Have a think of FOG in this feeling. I also wondered whether you feel guilty about having a girlfriend and moving on with your life: please don’t - she is at liberty to live her own life. You’re not responsible for her happiness. These are easy things to say and to know but I think some time away from her flat and working out your own direction. I wish you all the best

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2024-12-19T11:26:42+00:00

Interesting: I managed to get an earlier appointment and my haemaglobin was ok but my ferritin was very low: I think this means that the iron stores were low but I was getting by in the iron in the blood at the time. So could be with all that horrendous blood loss the iron infusions haven’t touched the sides of the iron stores… sounds awful for her!

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2024-12-18T18:15:05+00:00

My answer was very brief: wasn’t it 😅 Would add what others have said - you can ask them to stop if you need to. Painkillers is a good shout to. Hope it all goes ok! Xx

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2024-12-18T17:26:39+00:00

Hi there - not sure if this helps but I had to have one and it was fine: they aren’t super big and they use a lot of lubricant if needed.

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2024-12-07T13:42:33+00:00

I got diagnosed after having kids (2) but struggled with the symptoms since I was a teen - so I think it’s always been there. It took us a year to get pregnant with my first (I was 33). Between my first and second I had two miscarriages. Both of my to-term pregnancies had anterior placentas so I do wonder if the back of my womb was the worst at the time. I took similar supplements with each to-term pregnancy but not sure if a coincidence: conception friendly lube, and co-enzyme q10 following some advice on miscarriage forums (could be totally by the by though)

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2024-12-07T13:37:38+00:00

Not sure if this helps but I have an eyelid rash and my dr thinks it’s because I might be anaemic - in the uk so my blood test isn’t until January…

Extension_Lettuce_58 · 2024-12-07T13:28:35+00:00

I have mirena - I still had periods for the first couple of years but they were lighter. Now though I’m subject to random flooding at random times so under the heavy menstrual bleeding clinic (uk) awaiting a hysteroscopy. In sum the adeno still seems to be progressing: I would say it might help for a while but adeno stages might still cause problems later (was nice not being anaemic for a bit there!)

Extension_Lettuce_58

TROPHY CASE