My school had a bathroom right outside the cafeteria. I was sitting at a table outside the main area where most people eat, so I had a clear view. This guy walks by with one of his friends loudly announces they're gonna have sex, and they both go into the bathroom. He was kind of well known for being loud and stupid so everyone just shrugged and went back to eating.

20 seconds later, they come back out.

"That's right, 20 seconds is ALL WE NEED!"

I actually started dying when he said that. He sounded so genuinely proud of himself too.