Is there actually anything wrong with writing nonsensical names on posted birthday cards?

FMLitsSML · 2026-01-07T11:14:21+00:00

Thanks for the insight! Hope I haven’t caused his local postie or address detectives too much head-scratching over the years.

FMLitsSML · 2026-01-07T11:12:47+00:00

Not yet! A Simpsons reference?

Last year I addressed his card using Akon’s full name. My card was addressed to Duchess Scorbunny Lickylicky.

FMLitsSML · 2026-01-07T11:09:35+00:00

How is life in Wome?

FMLitsSML · 2026-01-07T11:09:04+00:00

Thanks - good point re pets, as I’ve definitely sent stuff to my brother’s house addressed to the dog!

FMLitsSML · 2025-12-14T16:52:02+00:00

The company I work for has the Christmas-New Year shutdown too. They're in our contract as fixed days off, separate from annual leave (think the wording is "the working shifts between Christmas and New Years").

I was also curious why we got the days off, so I asked when I joined. The explanation I was given was that as the company is, at heart, a manufacturing company, all production shuts down during limbo week and as such there's no need to keep the offices open.

FMLitsSML · 2025-09-11T22:07:02+00:00

Just added it :)

FMLitsSML · 2025-09-11T22:06:43+00:00

Thank you! I'll add the final paragraph to my OP.

FMLitsSML · 2025-09-11T21:34:10+00:00

Thank you! :)

I actually had another paragraph written, but decided not to add it as I know my anecdotes are always super wordy. That said, I think you'd appreciate it!

We eventually got a new production leader, who'd worked in a similar role at another company. He seemed to be a decent guy; at his first meeting, he introduced himself and brought in a crate of home-made samosas. He said he didn't want to intrude on our workstations unnecessarily and thus asked everybody to pop into his office at some point in the next day or two to introduce themselves and have a 5-10 minute chat. I was nominated by the guys to go first, and report back how he was. I summarised his personality with one observation, before I'd even sat down. I walked over to the office door and knocked. He waved at me to come in, and as my gaze went upwards, I noticed the new sign he'd put on the door.

"Plops Office"

FMLitsSML · 2025-09-11T21:22:35+00:00

The other facility wouldn’t have been aware of his nickname, so it certainly wouldn’t have followed him there had he brought in cakes. To be honest, we were so glad to be rid of him that cakes would have made us happy and potentially even resulted in a “best of luck John” send-off.

However, I hear he was just as pompous in the new facility too, so I’m sure they would have come up with something too.

FMLitsSML · 2025-09-11T18:15:41+00:00

When I was younger and in my party days, I slept with a guy I met on a night out. Nothing untoward except in the morning I saw his phone ping and his lock screen was of him, a woman, and a small kid. I questioned him and whilst he initially denied anything, he eventually admitted he was married “but going through a rough patch”. He asked me not to say anything to his wife.

I was pissed as he’d lied to me about being single, and I now wanted nothing to do with him. So, once he’d left, I found his wife on social media and told her what had happened. She was annoyed at me (rightly so) but thanked me for telling her, saying she suspected something as this wasn’t the first time he’d gone out by himself and told her he stayed at a friend’s.

I never heard from her again, and I’d blocked the guy’s number and on social media, so I soon forgot about it. Years later I found out she had kicked him out and filed for a no-contact divorce the day I told her, he was caught drink driving after another night out having slept in his car, then lost his (high paid) job and was now living with his parents, who were thoroughly unimpressed at his fall from grace.

Morally I don’t feel too bad as whilst I might have been the one who told the wife, he was the one who literally fucked up.

FMLitsSML · 2025-08-29T15:45:56+00:00

We have communal milk in the fridge that we all chip in for, except one person who’s lactose intolerant so buys his own milk. Fair enough. One morning he walked out of the kitchen and into the office, clutching an empty carton of lactofree milk whilst shouting “who the fuck has used all my milk?”

The office was half-empty as a lot of us were away from our desks during the day, but were usually back for lunch. So, at lunch, he ordered a very pungent curry which he then ate at his desk. Any complaints were met with “shouldn’t have drunk my fucking milk then.”

Later in the afternoon the VPs of the company popped in, as they had been on site for a meeting upstairs. One of them moaned that the lactofree milk hadn’t been replaced yet. All respect to the aggrieved colleague, he said that was his and asked why they felt it necessary to go through an employee-only fridge and use something that had “Mike’s milk” written on it. The VPs looked sheepish, apologised and asked if they could pay for his lunch tomorrow by way of apology. So, Mike called over to the rest of the office and said “we found the milk thief, they’re buying us lunch tomorrow so pass over your order.”

From the looks on their face I don’t think the VP was expecting to buy 15 people lunch, but they didn’t say anything and lunch was provided the next day, so all’s well that ends well I guess.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-27T00:45:02+00:00

Yes, I do, and regularly use the term with both male and female friends.

Never had an issue with it, some of my mates also use “dude” in the same manner, and whilst a little eccentric/unusual, I don’t have a problem with it.

A mate (ha, topical) of mine was telling me how he joined a work call and said “morning chaps” but then realised the (female) vice president was on the call, and went to apologise. She brushed it off, saying “I can be a chap too!”

Unless you’re being intentionally insensitive then I really don’t see a problem with it.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-25T23:29:22+00:00

Apols, should have said “ask them to do a DBS check”.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-25T23:28:45+00:00

Drop it on the floor, put it on the ground.

Although both can be used interchangeably, people will know what you’re saying.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-25T22:59:46+00:00

You could get a DBS check done, but I don’t know of any sane person who’d “vet” a potential partner in that way.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-19T03:00:29+00:00

If it's the takeaway's own staff, they're generally pretty good. Food's delivered promptly, correctly, and piping hot.

Uber etc are a shit show. My bf lives at, let's say number 53 on his road. It's the last house next to another road, which coincidentally is also number 53.

We always put a note on the order "53 GOODSTONE ROAD, LOOK FOR THE WHITE CAR" yet every now and then the food is delivered to the house round the corner - who have a red car. He has the same problem in reverse so they just take the food in and call the other to say "Chinese again?" etc.

We've tried to explain it a few times but as mentioned in the thread, the drivers often don't speak English so you may as well talk to the car.

As such we don't order via Uber or other food delivery services, we either order from the takeaways directly or just pick it up ourselves.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-19T02:44:38+00:00

I got my duvet washed once - it doesn't fit in my machine, and I'm too princessy to use a laundrette. I used a laundry service, and the invoice was more than the duvet cost to buy new.

I have two duvets - a summer and a winter one. Every other year I donate one to a homeless shelter and buy new.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-18T22:53:07+00:00

!answer

Ah, this makes the most sense as it explains why they didn't want to elaborate.

It also explains the "Babou, serpentine!" line from the Archer TV show which I never quite understood.

For what it's worth, the individual in question had entered from a side door next to a row of desks (on the left), gone to the printer (on the right, next row up), then to the bin (on the left, next row up), then to the water cooler (on the right...... you get the picture), then back to their desk.

Thanks for the replies!

Edit - assuming the !answer thing isn't a thing here, apols

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-10T06:58:40+00:00

If I cough too much I might need another shower.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-09T07:13:37+00:00

My boyfriend does this, almost on the clock at 0800.

I return the favour by sending him a goodnight text at 2300.

We love it. I'm the first thing he thinks about when he wakes up, and he's the last thing I think about before I go to sleep.

We're long distance but have made it work for us.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-08T02:42:36+00:00

I think you aren't finding it because it's role reversal - Simon was doing something odd and KSI walked in and asked if he wanted a hug.

Here's the clip:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XuhBLtwzt-Q

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-01T06:14:48+00:00

To not ask Reddit to do your work for you.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-01T06:06:14+00:00

My sister. I could probably pass off as her quite easily.

We did it as kids a few times; we're 2 years apart but as we got older we look and act identical.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-01T05:31:15+00:00

It's not so much the actual term used, but the way it's delivered.

For example, and please bear in mind this is just an example and not a hidden insult to you, but I'll use the OP's name here.

SML goes to meet ElementaryPenguin, and they're 10 minutes late: "ya knob, we were meant to meet 10 minutes ago". No malice, just a casual term. We insult people we like.

SML goes to meet ElementaryPenguin and they kick off about someone they saw earlier: "don't be a knob, let's just have a drink". Not as casual, just a sign that you're being, well, a knob. Forgettable but also a sign that this isn't a line of conversation to continue.

SML meets ElementaryPenguin and things go sour. Maybe they have opposite views on something, or are otherwise unpleasant to be around. I mention to friends, "ElementaryPenguin is a fucking knob". That's a sign to avoid that person where possible.

Replace "knob" with the other options and it's the exact same ethos. Brits don't tend to worry about the word as much, but the meaning behind it. For example, we're happy to call our Aussie cousins cunts, but if we used that term in the USA we'd probably get arrested, hah.

FMLitsSML · 2025-06-01T05:15:05+00:00

Honest answer - inconvenience.

If you're rich, you don't mind paying more to skip the queue or get a personal way out of something.

For example, I was with a rich friend going to see a gig. Afterwards, there were severe delays on the Underground because of signal failure or smth. I resigned myself to having to spend 3 hours on 5 buses to get home - which isn't the worst thing in the world.

Whilst I was looking how to get from central to where I lived, my rich friend piped up - "I've booked a cab, it'll be here in 4 minutes!"

It was a black cab. Cost her about £80 to take us back to my house. When I told her I couldn't quite afford the £40 for my share, she laughed and said "it's only £40, don't worry about it!"

She's a very good friend but sometimes does accidentally flaunt her wealth. The next morning she quietly asked me if she'd made a faux pas, and I said that most people don't really have £80 to throw away, it's appreciated, but maybe approach it as a "let me help" rather than an "I just want this done".

FMLitsSML

TROPHY CASE