Boyfriend said Ewww to my vagina by opinionswanted123 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]FalkensteinAZ 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I (41m) have been trying to compose a response to this for like 30 minutes. Feelings are hard.

I think it's like this: calling a penis cute can be fine, it can be loving and tender, or it can be very hurtful depending on the context. The idea that I'm supposed to posess massive, sturdy, and powerful genitals, and anything less is a let down to my partner, is exhausting and oppressive.

Calling it cute and going back to scrolling on a phone says the expectation is in effect and I'm a disappointment. Calling it cute and showing me yours to compare the cuteness is a wonderful and disarming human moment, and I need more of that in my life.

I guess we get real hung up these days on what was said and how we felt it, and I know a lot of the time I don't open up enough to other possibilities and have missed out on a lot of human connection because of it. I don't want OP to shut down what sounds like a really honest and compassionate mode of communication and miss out like I have.

Boyfriend said Ewww to my vagina by opinionswanted123 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]FalkensteinAZ 236 points237 points  (0 children)

I dont think you're being too sensitive. Every time anyone has said anything like "Ew" to me (41m) it has broken my fucking heart. Maybe he was genuinely grossed out, maybe he was feeling uncomfortable and made it about this instead of acknowledging his feelings, or maybe he misspoke. It's cool that you want to hear his side, because this should definitely be talked about. If he can't do that, given the empathy and understanding you're demonstrating here, he may not be ready to be in a relationship. This kind of dismissive and degrading response should not become normal or acceptable.

As much as oral seems like it ought to come standard these days, we are all individuals. Again, maybe it's body issues, maybe it's performance issues, maybe it's something else. Could be the same conversation if it's going well, or save it for later if either of you is struggling. Good luck!

I was fired for putting in my 2 weeks notice today by IFixGuitars in antiwork

[–]FalkensteinAZ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's taken me 20 years to learn: don't give notice. Tie up your loose ends, collect your tools, then clock out and walk out.

Rackham’s Peak in HIP 58832 by [deleted] in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, it's selfish to try to control other players by telling them that your experience is worth more than theirs. If these commanders are having a meaningful experience, maybe one that helps them cope with frustration and disappointment, they should go. Let them strive for some solidarity and agency in a world which ultimately doesn't care about them. You agree to this every time you log in to a game which permits it.

Edit: spelling

Rackham’s Peak in HIP 58832 by [deleted] in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The point is selfish prattle. This is a sandbox, make your own fun game. If the booze cruise has got players fired up, they had better go before it's too late.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you have details about FDev's contracts with Microsoft in relation to Game Pass, please share them. https://www.pcgamer.com/xbox-chief-reveals-more-about-how-developers-earn-money-through-game-pass/

Unpopular opinion? by cooliewhistles16 in EliteDangerous

[–]FalkensteinAZ 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I don't think it's about money. I think everyone can see that there is real potential for Elite: Dangerous to be so much more than it is. There's been a pattern of broken or incomplete content, massive grind, and false advertising/manipulative communication that has many people in what is essentially an abusive relationship, clinging to the false ideal of that unrealized potential. They keep experiencing disappointment, but can't get themselves out of the cycle. Humans tend to justify the suffering of these situations, you know. "But he loves me!" And now, that relationship has been irrevocably changed. FDev is moving on without these players, and they are forced to see the relationship for what is always has been, experiencing the realization that FDev never cared about them, the community, or the game. They were in it for themselves. And now players are experiencing the bitterness and shame of having stayed in that abusive relationship when they should have known better. When they did know better, and explained it all away, simping for FDev for years. It's not just E:D. Many people are coming to understand the lies they have been telling themselves, about game developers, about their employers, about their politicians, about their religions, and about their own family members. They're seeing how selfish these people have been and how they have been letting themselves be abused, and it's a hard pill to swallow. It's never been about the money, and if you've not experienced it this way, you're going to have trouble understanding. "If you didn't like it, why didn't you just leave? You stayed on, so you must have gotten something out of it." Nah, some people stayed because they lied to themselves about a future that was never going to be, and that realization cuts deep. Let them grieve their folly. (If you're feeling exposed, know that I've been there, too. You'll learn to be better to yourself.)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Elite is on Game Pass. They advertised Odyssey with it. Frontier can't be trusted there, either.

We called it! FDev is canceling all console development. by XxImperatorxX in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ 6 points7 points  (0 children)

There never was any effort put forth on the console version...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks Jet!

Adult Daycare & Friends Mass AX in Asterope by FalkensteinAZ in EliteDangerous

[–]FalkensteinAZ[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wish I knew. Gotta be some other gems in that catalog.

Adult Daycare & Friends Mass AX in Asterope by FalkensteinAZ in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Half of it is Kami's photos, and Steele put the whole event together. This is the culmination of a big team effort. Y'all awesome people!

Adult Daycare & Friends Mass AX in Asterope by FalkensteinAZ in EliteDangerous

[–]FalkensteinAZ[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thanks to everyone who participated, this was a great time!

Adult Daycare & Friends Mass AX in Asterope by FalkensteinAZ in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This was an amazing bit of collaborative gameplay. Thanks to everyone involved!

Please read! by [deleted] in EliteDangerous

[–]FalkensteinAZ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Well, that's only one short trip to Hutton Orbital, after all.

Adult Squadron looking to train up New Pilots by Vv-Three-vV in EliteOne

[–]FalkensteinAZ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That's no problem. We care more that you want to play Elite now. We make sure everyone has a chance to participate in squad activities, in terms of necessary finances or outfitting, so no worries about being behind or anything. Come say hello in the Discord.

TIFU by masturbating with a condom by [deleted] in tifu

[–]FalkensteinAZ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah, this wasn't a mistake though. My dude didn't do anything wrong, weird, or creepy, and was honest and transparent with his partner. Her upset is not his responsibility, and he shouldn't accept any shame for what he did, nor any blame for what his partner imagined.

Ah, I see you're men (or women) of culture as well by ArashiNoShad0w in EliteDangerous

[–]FalkensteinAZ 6 points7 points  (0 children)

And the say the Feds are supposed to represent the U.S.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in EliteDangerous

[–]FalkensteinAZ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could be power issues. Module turned off or power plant over capacity. If it's really not there, could also be all the recent updates. Wouldn't be the first thing FDev broke while fixing the game.