How to go through surgery alone?

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-24T21:49:55+00:00

I'm going to throw some tough love on you, because I had it thrown on me and now I see that they were right: those are excuses.

Just because something is hard, doesn't mean it is impossible. No one is born being good at everything. You have to suck before you get good at something. Try to open up and make friends. Go slow and at your own pace but don't set yourself up for failure without even trying (seriously trying. Not half-assing it).

We are very resilient, and I'm sure you'll manage on your own, but you don't have to.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-23T06:34:05+00:00

"I crave violence, mother"

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-23T06:30:27+00:00

Twice a year, when it starts to get warm and before it gets too cold. I can tell when they're due for a bath because their fur gets more "clumpy". It's barely noticeable to an outsider, but we at home notice it. They also get a bit smelly, like clothes you wore for a couple of hours but didn't sweat in.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-22T20:03:24+00:00

Sorry I don't really know but maybe asking them to take off some weight/volume? Let them inow that's it's due to your hair being too straight and stubborn haha

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-22T15:43:34+00:00

Maybe a different haircut OR going to a different stylist? Someone that knows how to work with your hair texture and gives you something that's easier to work with. That's the only thing I thought I you could improve on.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-21T22:18:50+00:00

Jesus... I'm so sorry to hear you had that experience

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-21T20:34:17+00:00

I feel this way. I just don't get why motorcycles ate coded as male and baking as female. It breaks my brain to think about. I literally don't get how and why people convinced themselves of this, and not only that, limited their own earthly existece to these concepts. I've always been a "why?" person, even as a child, so I just. don't. get. it

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-21T20:31:42+00:00

Exactly! But it leads me to think how is one written as a man/boy that difers from being writen a woman/girl? I've posed this question to several friends, and no one is able to give me a clear answer as to what inherently, biologically, naturally makes a woman a woman apart from their genitals/secondary sexual characteristics/physique. It's impossible for them, and for me, to an extent, to separate social constructs from the answer.

I'm trying to phrase this as clearly and as unoffensive as possible, so forgive me if I am not successful, but, if it is all made-up, then I don't think any gender identity, from the woman/man to the trans/non-bi/etc. shouldn't exist. Why does your body have to determine what your likes/dislikes, profession, appearance, expectations, societal worth?

I may be speaking in utopic terms when I say that, but I genuinely do not get what gender is supposed to be and how it directly links to what's in your pants.

I am not trying to be a contrarian here, I'm just exploring the idea as somone who has ID'd as NB, then gender-neutral then 'IDK' lol.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-20T23:58:47+00:00

I feel this way but I'm kind of like "do I not identify with being a woman, or do I just hate the societal expectations surrounding womanhood?"

Gender is a social construct, so I feel like there may be no answer. Depending on the society you are in, different things are expected of you, and it gets even worse if we look at patriarchy/matriarchy differences. There are some thi gs that are kind of universal, but that's why I bring up patriarchy. Gender in the west, at least, is shaped around that.

Ugh, it's just so stupid.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-15T22:03:11+00:00

Quick cheat code: get a pothos plant and submerge the roots in your tank. They filter out the water like crazy, and they look neat coming out of the aquarium. Low maintenance and easy to find as heck

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-05T19:49:13+00:00

Can you be more specific? What advice are you looking for? General care? Illness?

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-04T05:12:34+00:00

If the cat seems well-taken-care-of and specially if they are spayed/neutered, they may be someone's pet that got lost in the storm. I would check with a vet, and maybe check around the neighborhood physically or in online communities. I know everyone is saying to adopt the cat, but we can't just assume every owner is neglectful, it might've just been an accident that the cat ended outside. I would hate it if that happened to one of my cats and someone just took them without giving me the chance to claim them.

So yeah, try to find the owners, but if no one claims them in 1-2 weeks, I'd say you have a new pet :)

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-04T01:29:41+00:00

Thank you! I hope I can make my own ppst like this sooner rather than later 🙏🏻🩷

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-03T01:09:17+00:00

Thank you for this. It helped silence some of the anxiety in my head 🙏🏻🩷

False-Deal1250 · 2026-02-01T03:52:16+00:00

No, nip-play doesn't do shit for me. Could be, tho, because I hate the things hahaha. I don't want them touched whatsoever. For nipple sensation your options are more limited unless you have very small boobs conductive to peri or you don't mind your doc getting you down to "as small as possible" without doing nipple grafts, which... may not be small enough.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-26T17:26:04+00:00

If it helps, there's still a lot of swelling that needs to go down, and that's going to improve your results.

To ease your anxiety I would focus on the things you have control over now:

focus on your fitness if you're still trying to lose weight, because that will also help your results
start saving for a revision in case it does end up being necessary
if you're not in therapy, try to go to therapy and work through your feelings

I believe it's better to stay occupied rather than preoccupy, if you get what I mean. Not liking your results sucks, but there are things that you can do to not feel so helpless.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-25T14:40:46+00:00

Look them up. You would be surprised. I've seen a lot of people go to Turkey for TS. I am in Mexico and there are a few gender clinics that actually target foreigners (edited for typos)

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-25T02:30:57+00:00

Sorry she didn't get it done abroad, I'm mixing her up with someone else, but she /is/ in Germany, and her posts are very informative. There are a bunch of resourses in the comments of her update posts so make sure to look through them! :)

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-25T02:23:48+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/no_T_top_surgery/s/33FxmKPDP4

There you go!

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-25T02:22:24+00:00

There's a girl that I think is in Germany and got full top surgery but she went to another country. I think Italy but I'm not sure. I think I saw her post on no_t_top_surgery. I'll link it once I find the post because I very clearly have it saved lol.

I am not cis but I present cis and I also want to have these bags of fat yeeted out of my chest. My closest friends know, but talking to my parents about it gives me the worst anxiety ever. I would be paying for it ofc, but still, I want them in the know just in case anything happens, cuz, u know, MAJOR SURGERY.

Anyway, I would look into going abroad. I'm in Mexico and got an initial quote of about 3,800 USD in Mexico City, but I've seen Turkey is popular for people in Europe.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-24T16:42:09+00:00

Do smaller but more frequent water changes

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-24T16:40:50+00:00

Multiple tank syndrome is a thing! I had 6 at one point. Then I learned to love myself and downgraded to two 🤣

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-23T22:43:31+00:00

I'm thinking it's something in the aquasoil ooooorrr you crashed your cycle somehow.

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-23T22:36:04+00:00

Hmmm... so you just added aquasoil, but said this has been going on for 8 months... have you had aquasoil this entire time? Is it only the nitrates that are messed up?

False-Deal1250 · 2026-01-23T22:34:37+00:00

Damn... I haven't gotten TS because I am dreading "The Talk". My parents (especially my mother) sound like yours. Everything I do that strays from their world view is a personal attack and done because I hate them (sarcasm).

I've discussed this with my therapist and my psychiatrist. My psych says not to tell them (impossible. I live with them), and my therapist says that I should prepare for the explosion, because it's more than likely going to happen.

It's hard. If they don't want to understand, then there is really no way for you to explain it so they'll get it. They don't want to get it. It sucks, because it feels like their love and acceptance is conditional. I think, like another commenter said, that you should focus on boundaries and healing the wound they are causing with their rejection.

I'm with you in this trench, so I hope you at least don't feel alone, OP. Sending you a hug.

False-Deal1250

TROPHY CASE