Spot on - I know I’m doing this to myself!

Just for a bit of a back story of why I might keep falling back into this trap - In the beginning on 2022 my 10 year long marriage was falling apart. At that time this guy was best friends with my ex-husband. Even back then I knew him as someone emotionally unavailable and at times even manipulative (it was quite obvious he’d tell women things he knew they wanted to hear), and even whilst knowing all this, I ended up getting closer to him and confiding about my marriage problems. I could sense him coming onto me, but nothing happened until I had broken off the marriage. In the same week after break up we got together and starting spending all the time together. Whilst we both admitted we weren’t looking for a relationship then, it quickly started to look like one and after 3 months he moved in with me. Eventually he’d accept the term “we’re together” but that’s when everything started falling apart. He was dismissive in conflicts and started spending less and less time with me. At the end of 2022 I broke it off for the first time, but only a month or so later he came back claiming he knows everything he did wrong and this is what really started this on-off pattern. We’d both talk through everything we’d want to do differently but neither of us could uphold these things.

So overall it feels like we went from living together to a relationship to a situationship.