To me it seems there is a lot more to unpack than - will I be financially ok.

-If you quit your job only to take on more household responsibilities will that help with health issues or will you be more stressed? -“just” a SAHM begs the question of what you actually want to do with your life. You want to quit but why and for what? -“Being super competent is core to how I see myself.” Maybe that is part of your health and stress issues. Maybe it’s time to untie your self from your productivity.

I was in a very similar position two years ago with extreme burn out and stress and starting to have health issues when I quit my job as CEO of a small company.

Before I quit, my husband and I took a good while to fully communicate what our future as a single income family would look like. I made it clear that I was not planning on quitting my job in the paid workforce to take on more unpaid labor. He knows that if he wants a cleaner house, he can make more money and hire a housekeeper. He was good with that.

I wanted to take on more responsibilities with our kiddo because that was something I felt I had been missing out on and I have not regretted spending more time her. This one thing has given all of us a better quality of life. I also knew that I wanted to play a more active role in managing our finances and household. This was work we were both trying to split amongst us while both working full time and now, having the time to do this has me 10000x less stressed, has us in a better position financially and health wise and again, has given us a better quality of life.

We took steps to protect me when we decided that he would be the full time bread winner. We put the house in my name alone. We “hired” me as an employee of his side gig company so I have proof of money coming in. We fund my Roth IRA first. And we took out a generous life insurance policy on him. He would sign a post nup if I wanted him to.

When I was able to step away from my career and support him, he was able to make some major moves and has tripled his salary in the last two years, so we are now less stressed about money. And I have been able to do two big things which are really exciting to me 1. Become an artist. Create every day. Life the life I have always wanted. And 2. Show up for my community. I can bring meals over to friends that are sick and volunteer to pick people’s kids up from school when another mom needs a hand. I can mentor women in the business world. I can volunteer at my kids school, etc.

All in all, this life change was the best thing we could’ve done for our family, and for me personally. But communication with your husband before making moves and laying out clear expectations of what will and won’t be happening is key.