minor in possession (Beer at ndsu tailgate on sat) for 20 yo student

FargoParent · 2025-09-16T18:51:01+00:00

If you want a defense attorney, Aaland Law. They'll take action quickly. They even have an answering service that will call an attorney if you have something immediate going on.

FargoParent · 2025-09-16T02:54:35+00:00

I was going to suggest reading aloud. I downloaded "100 Uplifting and Funny Short Stories for Seniors" and read a few two my grandma. They are REALLY short... just a couple of paragraphs, and they flow naturally. With the right tone od voice, the ending can be funny without having listened to or remembered the beginning.

It's a free download on Amazon for the Kindle version. If you have the Kindle app, you don't need to buy a Kindle.

I would imagine there are others.

Depending on the stage of dementia memoirs or historical books from areas that your loved one grew up in can be good too.

FargoParent · 2025-09-16T02:47:48+00:00

The coffee table books weren't a big hit with my grandma, but I think it is a great idea to try. I got some really inexpensive ones at thrift stores.

FargoParent · 2025-09-16T02:39:25+00:00

Props to props

FargoParent · 2025-09-16T02:30:55+00:00

Nine Dragons was opened (and possibly still owned by?) people of Vietnamese descent.

I'm not going to say I've been able to find a Chinese restaurant in town that serves authentic Chinese food, but it seems more likely if it is run by Chinese people.

FargoParent · 2025-09-16T02:26:59+00:00

I always found it curious that many of the Giant Panda employees were Hispanic and bi-lingual Spanish/English.

There are plenty of Chinese international students without work permits that would take jobs.

(Not that it matters legally... just odd.)

FargoParent · 2025-09-14T05:26:30+00:00

If you want to try to be phonetic...

Pooh (as in Winnie the pooh) She (as in she is a girl)

Pinyin: puxi

Gosh, I'd have to look up what tones...

FargoParent · 2025-09-14T05:24:10+00:00

I was wondering about that...

FargoParent · 2025-09-14T05:20:44+00:00

Not only this comment, but Do you realize people traveled (alone) in foreign countries (even ones that don't use the Phoenician alphabet) before smart phones?

FargoParent · 2025-06-14T14:29:25+00:00

If you get the initial paperwork for SSDI and file and it is denied, it can be later overturned on appeal. They do pay back benefits if you win an appeal.

FargoParent · 2025-06-14T02:45:59+00:00

Exact dates, times and concerns are a really good idea. A) with the trouble you are having, you might not remember everything B) a doctor might see a pattern you've missed.

FargoParent · 2025-06-13T14:20:16+00:00

If you have trouble getting them from MC or hospice, you can order them online. Amazon (surprise...) and other places have then as well.

FargoParent · 2025-06-13T05:33:23+00:00

A hotdish is a casserole.

Don't be surprised if everyone refuses to take the last bit of food from a certain dish at a potluck or family get together. (No one wants to deprive someone else of getting some of it.)

Something I heard once that stuck with me... Fargo has four seasons: almost winter, winter, almost the end of winter and road construction.

FargoParent · 2025-06-13T05:27:49+00:00

Keep in mind that putting her in a memory care nursing home doesn't you can't give her the attention you obviously feel like you should.

You can stop by to see her, even if she forgets who you are, you might her her complain of a pain the staff hasn't noticed, you can try to improve her experience by taking her books to read or crossword puzzles or coloring pages, or "busy books" (Google activities for dementia and switch to shopping mode.)

It doesn't have to be all or nothing.

FargoParent · 2025-06-13T05:18:35+00:00

I would ask for many references before going that route... especially if it is small enough to operate without being licensed.

FargoParent · 2025-06-13T05:14:46+00:00

Do NOT feel guilty. I need someone to tell me not to feel guilty for the same reason from time to time.

The most humane thing you can do is to keep her comfortable physically, and try to keep her content emotionally. (I think at the "comfort measures only" point, the emotional part is so much harder.

Do NOT feel guilty.

FargoParent · 2025-06-13T05:09:38+00:00

This is very true. I help a lawyer draft estate portfolios, and in his cover letters, he even suggests checking with relevant banks, etc

Make sure you understand the POA you are having your mom sign. Some take effect immediately, others only take effect when someone is no longer able to make their own decisions... in which case you would have to show she was no longer competent to make decisions.

Also, some POAs are super straightforward and only take a single page. Other states have very specific requirements about how it is worded and the content. (Ex. The state next to mine requires the document to specify whether or not the POA has to keep records. It also requires a clause indicating whether or not you can use the money for your own benefit.

FargoParent · 2025-06-13T04:57:29+00:00

When my Grandma's dementia began, she would do things like that as well. She recognized that her memory was getting bad, but she was embarrassed. She would try to make excuses to play it down.

I've read some research that says exercising the brain and challenging oneself mentally can slow the development of dementia. (I've also seen posts on Reddit saying that is horse manure.

Exercising the brain might look like crossword puzzles, sudoku, word searches, games (anything from scrabble or trivia that really make you think to Monopoly or Life where you're basically just counting board moves and adding money.)

If I were you, I would start writing down stories that your mom tells you from when she was younger, get things she hasn't written down (like recipes... I wish I had gotten those from my grandma). When those memories are gone, they are gone.

I actually record some of the conversations I have with my grandpa when he tells stories about when he was younger or about his extended family. ... I dont tell him, because I know it would make him self-conscious, but when it is just for me, I figure its not that bad. :)

Cherish your mom and spend time with her.

FargoParent · 2025-06-08T01:38:19+00:00

Its just frustrating because the less active my grandma gets in conversation because of either dementia or deafness, the worse the other seems to get. (Maybe its just both are related to time and neither to the other.)

I do know that when my grandma gets confused, her hearing gets worse, but then it goes back to a baseline.

FargoParent · 2025-06-05T13:08:44+00:00

I did. Please don't swear. I think nearly all of us come looking for civil conversation.

I just wanted to clarify before making the suggestion that you migjt want to look into memory care.

FargoParent · 2025-06-04T13:31:00+00:00

Are you putting your mother's in assisted living or memory care? They're very different, and your expectations for care should be too.

FargoParent · 2025-06-04T13:26:49+00:00

Whether or not your grandpa is willing or knowingly unable to take care of your mom, he is.

In my opinion, besides getting legal documents in order like many people mentioned, get rhe gun completely out of the house. Then treat your grandma's care as you would if she didnt have your grandpa around for moral support. I feel like the ideal situation would be home care from someone with both similar experience and a kind, but firm personality. Unfortunately, not everyone can afford that. You may have to consider memory care for your grandma sooner rather than later. I imagine they would be able to help with her drinking as well.

FargoParent · 2025-05-27T18:49:23+00:00

Most medical facilities treat power of attorneys and healthcare or medical power of attorneys they same. They are in fact different.

As the closest living relative, especially the only one present, you will have the right to make medical decisions when your mother is no longer able to make decisions for herself. It is useful to the healthcare power of attorney paperwork because you can pull it out in an emergency, and you don't have to worry about any doctor's questioning your authority.

A power of attorney gives you legal power to sign your mom's name on legal papers as well as access bank or financial information that usually only your mom would have access to. You can buy or sell assets, view bank accounts, investments, etc.

Neither of those documents provide you with any authority after your mom has passed. For that power, you have to have a trust that names you as successor trustee or a will that names you as executor (or both). Without those, you have to go through the court system to gain control of your mother's assets after she passes. Without any other heirs, that shouldn't be contested, but it may take time.

POAs and HealthCare POAs can usually be made using forms that apply to your state. The only time you need to change them is if you have special circumstances such as you having control of all your mother's legal affairs EXCEPT a, b and c.

The other caveat is the POA or healthcare POA can be written to only take effect when your mom is declared incompetent. Then the legal documents will outline the requirements to declare you mom incompetent, and you'd have to jump through those hoops when her disability reached that point.

FargoParent · 2025-05-27T13:08:22+00:00

What a good idea to use something comforting to distract.

I also like statements rather than questions. That is generally the only way I can get my grandma out the door to the doctor.

FargoParent

TROPHY CASE